DR. RICHARDSON, I PRESUME

If you saw the highlights of last night's Richmond -v- St Kilda match you would have seen Jack Riewoldt smack his head into the deck, get up with jelly legs, be assisted from the field, shamble down the race to see the doctors for a concussion test, then re-emerge to crack the shits at the Tiger medical staff for not letting him return to play.

Whether Jack's tantrum was warranted is worthy of debate. Should he have carried on like a pork chop? Should he have sucked it up and accepted the medical verdict? How bad was his concussion? Could he have continued to play without impairment? How much residual damage is he likely to incur, if any? Was he in fact fine and cracking the shits with a clear head as he thought the medical staff were over-reacting? Was he totally addled to the point where he was oblivious to his dummy-spit? All fair questions which could have been debated on the 3AW pre-match when they discussed last night's match. Instead Matty Richardson jumped in with an alacrity that suggests he may have been previously worded up by the Tigers. I paraphrase:

"Jack's reaction was understandable in the circumstances, since emotional and angry responses are classic symptoms of concussion."

This was followed by a blithe acceptance from the other members of the AW footy panel and the debate ended right there. Richo, Riewoldt's friend and former team-mate, had neatly shut down the discussion via a statement of fact.

Now, I am no doctor, so following Dr. Richo's diagnosis I sought a second opinion from my local internet. Signs and symptoms of a concussion may include:

• Headache or a feeling of pressure in the head
• Temporary loss of consciousness
• Confusion or feeling as if in a fog
• Amnesia surrounding the traumatic event
• Dizziness or "seeing stars"
• Ringing in the ears
• Nausea or vomiting
• Slurred speech
• Fatigue

That list was from the Mayo Clinic and several other sites failed to list "emotional and angry responses" as classic symptoms of concussion.

That is not to reject Richo's medical expertise. One site listed irritability as a symptom, while Wikipedia mentions "crankiness" and "displays of emotion that are inappropriate to the situation."

But at least one question came immediately to mind: how often have you seen players blowing up after copping a concussion?

Comments

[m0nty]

Obviously a scientific study is required. A group of scientists should surround Robert Walls and hit him in the head repeatedly, to see if he gets tired and emotional. And video the results, to be played on OWAAT.

[Big Ramifications]

With Daniel Bell currently suing the AFL... there's your answer. And that's what should be parrotted with previously worded aclarity.

Doesn't matter what any doctor's opinion is, doesn't matter how unfaaaair the player thinks it is. The ambulance chasers are here to stay [watch this space] and it's ASS COVERING time.

[Tony]

Looks like Richo got his lines right:

Richmond forward Jack Riewoldt's spat put down to concussion

RICHMOND spearhead Jack Riewoldt was concussed and clearly unfit to return to action against St Kilda at the MCG on Friday night.

That was the verdict from Tigers coach Damien Hardwick and the club's elite performance manager, Matthew Hornsby, who fully supported the decision of the club's medical staff to sideline the reigning Coleman medallist.

"Being agitated and emotional are common reactions to concussions, and we've seen that on numerous occasions. The decision by the medical team to not allow him back on the field was absolutely the right one. In our view, he was not fit to see out the match."

Curiously Rod Nicholson was credited with writing that article in the paper, but Bruce Matthews was credited with the online version.

[Tony]

Biggy,

Aclarity?

But you are right about the lawyers/insurance companies/arse covering.

[Professor Rosseforp]

Tony the emotional level of your response indicates a high level of concussion.

[Professor Rosseforp]

http://www.aafp.org/afp/990901ap/887.html
This is an oldish article (1999) but looks like the kind of thing the AFL has just got a hold of. No mention of being tired and emotional as a symptom, but a handy chart summarises the action to be taken after concussion, according to various authorities. If the AFL or any other footie code adopts this sort of table, there won't be a club able to put an entire team on the field by about round 10. No union scrums will be packed from next weekend.
Importantly, there's no mention of how much the club paid for the player so get him back on the field anyway, "In my day we never even heard of concussion, bunch of nancy boys, just play the game".

[Professor Rosseforp]

Sorry, one more comment: in the light of the symptoms, Jack Riewoldt's shit-cracking episode may have been positive proof that he WASN'T concussed.

[Big Ramifications]

Aclarity?

[Sheepishly kicks dirt] Irregardless, for all intensive purposes you know what I meant.

[Tony]

It all goes well.

[Professor Rosseforp]

Maybe an urban myth memory, but I remember Bob Dylan touring Australia for the first time, and a reporter asked him if he was prolific. Bob looked a bit stunned and said, "Yes, I guess you could describe me as profilic". Not sure if it was a leg-pull, drugs, long flight or plain hignorance.

[Big Ramifications]

I recently read that "irregardless" is about to become accepted as a word. The morons have won.

[Big Ramifications]

Sorry, one more comment: in the light of the symptoms, Jack Riewoldt's shit-cracking episode may have been positive proof that he WASN'T concussed.

Exactly. Talk about hedging your bets by including the widest possible range of emotions. Why not add "overly polite," "unusually wistful," and, I dunno, "idiot savant."

[Tony]

I was going to use the phrase "catch all" but I knocked it out just before I pressed publish.

[Tony]

As in "displays of emotion that are inappropriate to the situation" seems like a bit of a catch all.

Without doubt that's the one the Tigers/AFL/medicos would cherry pick to back a point.

[Yobbo]

"I recently read that "irregardless" is about to become accepted as a word. The morons have won."

For all "intensive purposes" they have, yes.

[Tony]

You're on the same tact as Biggy Sizzle.

[Big Ramifications]

Gotta apologise for repeating that one - 2nd or 3rd time I've used it here. It's my "go to" malapropism and it's made me lazy. I couldn't think of another fitting example off the top of my head.

Yobbo, just like when "trait" used to be pronounced "tray." I tried to keep the flame alive. I remember an English teacher mum of a friend gave me a big verbal high five when I corrected her son and she over heard me.

But I notice the Oxford dictionary allowed the moron version some time in the 80s or 90s.

[Professor Rosseforp]

Tray used for "trait" was big in psychological circles at one time. When I first heard it I had no idea what was being spoken about -- not an unusual phenomenon in psychological conversations.
One of the best malaphorism goes back to the days of the TV show, "Number 96". One of the characters, Dorrie Evans, was very like Kath and Kim in picking up mispronounceiations, and used to say she was "going beresk". I still use it, and don't recall anyone correcting me or even noticing.

[Big Ramifications]

It's like "bereft" meets "beserk."

When in company I use "psychotic" in place of "psychic." eg. I'll predict a wicket and next ball there's a wicket and I'm all "I'm psychotic!" I nearly always get corrected.

I pinched it from a movie but I can't remember which one. A teenager refers to his mate as being psychotic.

[Tony]

So that is where "go beresk" comes from. I've never seen No.96. People used to say it back in the 70s and 80s and I always thought it sounded a little odd, but that thought never extended to wondering where it came from.

[Professor Rosseforp]

"People used to say it back in the 70s and 80s" -- Strewth, time to update my slang!
Biggers, I used to do a similar thing with "prophetic" and "pathetic", but I don't think anyone actually understood, or maybe it was not that funny.
One of my funniest experiences in this sort of area was trying to teach a Chinese guy about rhyming slang. He spoke English very well, and had migrated to Australia when he was in his 40s. I started out with the notion of "Captain Cook" or "butcher's hook" meaning "look", but he was never able to understand how it worked, and would come out with statements like "Let Captain Cook see what you are doing" or "Give the butcher a hook so that he can see". Probably marginally less funny than my attempts at Mandarin.

[Tony]

You could have knocked me down with a wether. This morning on AW they were talking about words that get pismronounced (and thank you to you, Ronnie Barker) and Ross Stevenson mentioned how Dorrie Evans from No.96 used to say "going beresk". The origins of berserk are QI.

Half an hour later on SEN Andrew Gaze described Andrew Maher's wife as being "in the 'throngs' of having a baby." Which I guess means she was in a crowded delivery room.

[Tony]

Someone (not sure if it was AW or SEN, since I was 'alf asleep) referred to Rory McIlroy as Roy McIlrory, which kind of works.

[Big Ramifications]

Cor blimey. Andrew Gaze was the first professional TV person I ever heard say "for all intensive purposes."

The circle is now complete.

[Tony]

Andrew Gaze is one of Australia's premier mal-aphorists.

[Professor Rosseforp]

"Ross Stevenson mentioned how Dorrie Evans from No.96 used to say "going beresk". " -- talk about synchronometry!

[Tony]

Saturday night's dummy spitting by Riewold makes last week's lame excuse mongering look ever lamer:

That's just slack, Jack

Damien Hardwick was less than impressed with Riewoldt's performance against Hawthorn at the MCG last night, in which he was seen yelling at a teammate and giving "the bird" to the Hawk bench when he left the field before halftime.

"(Attitude) is one aspect that Jack must work on. He has known that for two years now. Full-forwards come under scrutiny and they are a bit of an easy target. He was yelling at Dustin Martin at one stage and that is unacceptable. We will address that during the week."