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I am Not Trampis

about time Tones,

Another disastrous MCG wicket. Why do they have tests?

Any person who turns up to a test in OX and wears a suit should be shot.
I discuss this test and sandpapergate that is what has never been talked about at my place

I am Not trampis

A pitch which is not easy to bat on. I am worried about our batting on it.

I am Not Trampis

Christchurch or Centurion much better pitches than here. Why are we so poor?


The AFL dont care about the cricket, they rule in Melbourne, hence all talk and no action on the pitch
The sporting capital of Australia has a large vessel that fills with people one day, and 25% full hte next. I say rate this a poor pitch, so Boxing Day goes to the Gabbatoir.

I an Not Trampis

Can people involved in cricket ;learn what banter is.

It is communication between at least two people which involves mirth.
It does not happen in cricket as it RELAXES a batsman. Captains want to UNSETTLE a batsman.

We can't play at the Gabba, it is easily the best pitch in Australia

Tony Tea

The same curator who did the Perth pitch is now doing the MCG pitches. Apparently it took him 3 years to get the Perth pitch Test-ready. This was stated to the MCG hierarchy who then put a similar plan in place in Melbourne. Part of that was buying time with one or two more years of the current pitch.

I am Not Trampis

I would sak it as a pitcg next season.
How do the poms, kiwis and aardvarks do good itches and we cannot?

Tony Tea

I don't know much about pitch science, but I'm on board with making our pitches more like SA and NZ. Not so keen on the Pommy pitches, which are made to order for particular opponents' weaknesses.


Perhaps E Kohli ia planning to wear out our bowlers so they cant scratch themselves by the time SCG comes along. Might be the master of the long game EK

Tony Tea

Win here and they win the BorGav.

Tony Tea

As in, retain.

I am Not Trampis

We can only assume the Indians found it hard to score on the pitch otherwise it makes no sense


Nice to hear Mr Bird talking up the win. It took the no.1 test team 5.5 sessions to get their score. It will take us that long to reach it. That leaves 4 sessions for 20 wickets to fall. Hmmmm.


Actually for us to win we cant lose our ten wickets, so lets say we scrape home with 2 up or sleeve. That still means we have to take their ten in less that half the time it took first time around.

I am Not Trampis

We cannot win. India can only win IF all ball that do something take wickets which is highly unlikely.

This will be a boring draw.
I think I shall do something else today unless I hear wickets are falling

I am Not Trampis

tests are interesting in NZ and SA though.
I know the Sri Lankan coach and he must have been pulling his hair out at some of the non shots.

I an Nor Trampis

So the curator is Mitchell Marsh's uncle.
He saved his career last year and wanted to do the same this year!

Me thinks Redders, dougie and Chappelli must be pulling their hair out watching Lyons take so many wickets. Lyons has no arm ball so going down the wicket to him involves no risk at all. Why aren't the Indians doing this at al. ( sorry i have been tols a million times not to exaggerate.)

Meanwhile i have reruns of The Virginian to watch

Meritocratic Meritocracy

Australia 2018/2019
Order Name State Tests 1st Class
1 Marcus Harris WA 35.5 35.49
2 Aaron Finch Vic 33.37 35.95
3 Usman Khawaja NSW 42.8 43.87
4 Shaun Marsh WA 34.82 41
5 Travis Head SA 35.62 36.94
6 Mitchell Marsh WA 26.08 31.93 208.19
7 Tim Paine (w) TAS 36.91 29.95 245.1
8 Pat Cummins NSW 19.22 23.72
9 Mitchell Starc NSW 20.91 21.74
10 Nathan Lyon NSW 12.53 13.07
11 Josh Hazlewood NSW 12.65 12.38
Total 310.41 326.04

Prediction: Oz to make 250 to 300

Only instance where Test stats significantly better than 1st class stats is Paine.

Remarkable how 1st class stats predict Test stats.

Possible selection strategy: only select batsmen with 1st class averages higher than 40. The higher the 1st class batting average the better. Yes, it's counter all Australia Test selection criteria for the last several years but worth a try.

Meritocratic Meritocracy

For comparison:

India 2018/2019
Order Name State Tests 1st Class
1 Hanuma Vihari 26 58.71
2 Mayank Agarwal 0 49.98
3 Cheteshwar Pujara 49.77 53.89
4 Virat Kohli 54.23 54.39
5 Ajinkya Rahane 41.38 51.32
6 Rohit Sharma 38.89 54.11
7 Rishabh Pant (w) 38.75 50.2
8 Ravindra Jadeja (a) 32.44 47.12
9 Mohammed Shami 11.1 11.8
10 Ishant Sharma 7.74 8.38
11 Jasprit Bumrah 1.55 7.44
Total 301.85 447.34
Actual 443

I am Not Trampis

I am wondering whether the abomination of T20 has affected the preparation of test pitches

Meritocratic Meritocracy

To be fair, I just went through the Shield batting stats and only NSW's Patterson averages better than 40 (41).

It's possible we are also experiencing a glut of top class bowlers which is driving down the batting averages.

I am  Not Trampis

or the opposite

Meritocratic Meritocracy

Best Australia 2018/2019
Order Name State Tests 1st Class
1 Marcus Harris WA 35.5 35.49
2 David Warner NSW 48.2 48.63
3 Usman Khawaja NSW 42.8 43.87
4 Steven Smith NSW 61.37 57.27
5 Kurtis PattersonNSW 40 41
6 Peter Handscomb VIC 39 38.65
7 Tim Paine (w) TAS 36.91 29.95 303.78
8 Pat Cummins NSW 19.22 23.72
9 Mitchell Starc NSW 20.91 21.74
10 Nathan Lyon NSW 12.53 13.07
11 Josh Hazlewood NSW 12.65 12.38
Total 369.09 365.77

Patterson deserves a spot over Head but seeing as Head is incumbent him staying we still collectively average 299.

Current Australia team's collective average is 245.

Indian team is 301 though if we give Agerol a Test average the same as his 1st class then their collective average is 350.85.

Summary: Marsh brothers are selected under false pretenses and if we were to go to a stats based selection policy (meritocratic) rather than the current nepotistic policy we would be a 50 run better team.

Meritocratic Meritocracy

Correction: I was comparing the 1 to 7 batting orders including wicket keeper.

Current Oz: 245.1
Best Oz 1: 303.78 (with Patterson)
Best Oz 2: 299.40 (with Head)

Current India: 249.02
India with Agarol at 1st Class Average: 299

Conclusion: if it weren't for ridiculous media driven over reaction to sandpaper incident combined with a non-nepotistic selection policy Oz would be on par batting wise with India.

I am Not trampis

Only Australia could lose three wickets on a flat track whilst I was watching the Virginian. what an actor Doug McCure was

no point in bowling around the wicket. Foot points down the wicket and makes swinging the ball in very hard. no-one is swinging it so much away to bowl around the wicket also

Tony Tea

We are currently going through a shocking drought of good batsmen. It remains to be seen whether we can turn it around and build up another bank of good batsmen. The changed cricket landscape suggests we may struggle.

Meritocratic Meritocracy

Prediction: Oz to make 250 to 300


Prediction: Oz to make 200 to 250

Homer, try Shenandoah and see if that brings us better luck.

Tony Tea

Is that you, Pat? Merry Christmas to ya.

Meritocratic Meritocracy

Sean Mush just got the bum's rush.

Great ball, Bumrah.


Hiya Tones, 'tis I.

Merry Christmas to you and yours too, mate! Hope the tree change is bringing you cooling shade this summer.


What about if you look at the bowling averages. Should we be able to bowl out India for less than their average? In Australia you would expect so. I would imagine our bowlers would destroy our batting line up. Good thing they dont count the wickets in the nets. Still the bottom half of the order will put on at least 100, So Head/Marsh only need to cobble a 50 stand and we get passed the follow on.

I am Not Trampis

Good movie but the Tail is in now so might watch the cricket now. Can someone get rid of Mel McLaughlin


What about if you look at the bowling averages.

Good call and I was thinking about that but decided to crack a Clare Valley riesling instead.

Would be good to see all these sort of stats presented before and during games. There's a ton of variety of stats to apply but the base batting average is the benchmark.

I am Not Trampis

good decision more so if it is an aged Reisling. Nectar of the gods


Look at our batsmen averages in Australia and theirs in Australia. Should be pretty close I think.

I am Not Trampis

I agree our batsmen are average


If the tail bat at average we still fail to make the follow on.

What a shambolic debacle this Test has turned into.

So much for the MCG pitch being a road. More like a road on the outskirts of Kabul when we're batting.

I am Not Trampis

If I was umpiring I would stop the panting.

If the Umpire finds it hard to concentrate then the batsman would.

Tony Tea

Th pitch was a road on day one, and it played the team which lost the toss out of the game.

Tony Tea

One of the reasons I cut back blogging the cricket is that I would find distillations of my posts popping up in the MSM unattributed, but one thing that never really got into the MSM was that we've been smashing it about Australia's weak batting for 10 years, but it's only just become apparent to the rest of the punters. Why? If it was obvi to us fat heads, why wasn't it obvi to everyone else?

I am Not Trampis

151 on a complete road. I don't care how good Bumrah is that was a disgrace.

In my second comment I said I was worried about our batting on this pitch.
When the Marshs paly we have a long tail

How prescient. A Christmas prescient no less

I am Not trampis

From a bowling perspective Starc has rarely swung the ball dangerously. From a technical point of view his right foot is usually pointing at the WK not 1st slip.

He is not bowling consistently quick as he can.

I still think he is carrying an injury


Irrespective of the pitch we are a poor batting side currently, Its just that out bowlers can get us into the game when the conditions suit us. 2010 Ashes all over again. Then they wrote a big report. Perhaps someone should read it again. It should go like this
1. Stop the big bash
2. Start focusing on first class cricket.
3. Ban the toss, take it in turns to decide who bats first
4. Dont eber ban our 2 best players for 12 months ever again..

I am Not trampis

The Big Bash is an abomination. We apparently cannot change our techniques for rec ball and white ball cricket.

if you ignore first class cricket you ignore test cricket
the toss is part of cricket. Losing the toss does not mean losing a match IF the pitch is a test pitch.

suspension on all three were over the top as administrators who had no credibility punished the players with sentences never seen before.

Why have people noted out batting weaknesses. Perhaps because we understand and love cricket

Big Ramifications

2 down. Cummins on fire. We're gonna win this.

Big Ramifications

Haha. 3 down. Cummins got his 3rd about a second after I hit post.

Big Ramifications

Rohit Sharma with the oldskool 1970s pads to face Cimmins' hat-trick ball.


Well, this game - and this blog! - has just roared into life, hasn’t it? I watched the first two balls of the opening day and then my dodgy website went down and wouldn’t come back online, so I went to bed and didn’t bother staying up for day 2 or 3 given the scores. I might even stay up this evening, though.

We’re toast, obviously, but at least we’re not 2010/11 Ashes toast. And it’s good to see Cummins getting some wickets finally. He’s deserved his success. He dropped a sitter yesterday and still got a herogram article on cricinfo, and I’m sure not many begrudged it.


Jesus, that was a dog’s breakfast. I might try that again.

.... my dodgy website went down and wouldn’t come back online, so I went to bed. Didn’t bother staying up for days 2 or 3 given the scores. I might stay up this evening, though.

PS - Season’s greetings one and all. Good to see such a good turn-out for this match.


Just watched the highlights of today. Classic case of what comes around goes around; Cummins will never get luckier than he did today, with two dismissals at leg gully and then another strangled down the leg side. He’s deserved that luck given how he’s bowled lately without much reward, though.


Our sole objective should be to keep them bowling as long as we possibly can. If we do this a win will happen as there is time enough for that. We need another Dubai second innings effort.

I am Not Trampis


We could not get 200 runs let alone over 300. if it gets to 400 forget it.

I know the Ashes is a long way off but the addition of Warner and Smith might not be the Godsend a lot of people think it is. Warner is a flat track bully. My memory has it he only scored a ton at the oval where conditions were benign. Smith's technique gets found out if the ball is swinging and seaming around ( how come TV commentators do not know the difference?).

Anderson could bowl to 50 over there as well. At least they have batting problems as well

I am Not Trampis

terming some-one an allrounder usually means the person has no idea.

We have had only one allrounder in the game thus far. My memory might be suspect so I won't be dogmatic. That is Ian Botham.
An allrounder can hold his place in the team both as a batsman or bowler. he has consistently s won tests with both bat and ball.


Mark down the name Marnus Labuschagne in your black books. The Tonk hears the Queensland batsman remains firmly in the plans of selectors this summer and could even be a late addition to the squad for the Sydney Test.


With a 1st class average of 33.17 the best one can say about his selection is that at least the selectors remain consistent in picking batsmen in the low 30 batting averages.

Kurtis Patterson is averaging 41 yet can say goodbye to any hopes of ever being selected for Oz given this slap in the face.

Tony Tea

Everyone goes on about who should be in and who should be out, but while nearly everyone deserves to be out, no one deserves to be in.

I am Not Trampis

Can't disagree with that outstanding logic.

Australia now has pressure on it. Every batsman knows if they play a Marsh shot they wil be out. They also know a ball might do anything, more likely be a grubber and they are gawn


Everyone goes on about who should be in and who should be out, but while nearly everyone deserves to be out, no one deserves to be in.

Average of 41 vs average of 33.

The 41 deserves to be selected every time.

We the public deserve an explanation from the selectors as to why they keep on selecting this rotating cast of clowns.

Did Patterson do an O'Keefe?

I am Not Trampis

What is it about Shami.
He looked to be bowling at 160 in Perth and even in Melbourne he looks easily the quickest bowler BUT he is not

I am Not trampis

Why oh why would anyone review that when he knew he did not hit the ball.

That is almost cheating, no it is.

Only umpires should be able to use the DRS southwester it contradicts the spirit of cricket

I am Not Trampis

notice how many times the umpire at the bowling end is not watching whether the batsman has pout his bat past the popping crease


Ok, the selectors have had their fun with us but it's time to get serious and never select Mitch Marsh again.

I am Not Trampis

I prefer Groucho ,Chico or Harpo Marsh

Tony Tea

A suitable exclamation mark for this, yet another ignominious loss - would be to have day five totally washed out.


Apparently the last time an Australian batsman didnt get a 50 was against the Windies in 88/89. Thats 30 years ago. At the MCG. Time for a repeat dose. The good news is that the Ashes of '89 rose from that performance. Any bets on it happening again?

I am Not Trampis

Let us look at both teams future for say 4 years.
India are looking good. Assume their teenage sensation is simply an average test batsman then they have solved their opening batting problem. They can choose between 3 or 3 batsmen for no. 6. bowling Sarma will retire but they have Kumar who although medium pace can swing it both ways and is useful as a batsman. Pant, like Marsh before him can only improve.

Australia has a formidable attack but who will eventually replace Paine. Yes Smith comes back but he can never captain the team again so who will it be.
We also need batsmen. A lot of them


Here are the batting stats for Shield 2018/2019. I've only included those who've played 4 or more matches and have averaged 40 plus.

Count Name Age Matches Innings 2018/2019 Avge 1st Class Tests Position
3 Matthew Wade 31 6 12 "63.44 " 39.57 "28.58 "
2 Marcus Harris 26 5 8 71.57 35.49 35.5
4 Michael Neser 28 5 8 52 26.45 n/a Allrounder
5 KR Patterson 25 6 11 47.55 41 n/a
6 JA Burns 29 6 12 47.2 40.58 36.76 Opener
7 DP Hughes 30 6 11 46.2 39.76 n/a
1 Jake Lehmann 26 6 11 46.1 39.62 n/a
8 TLW Cooper 32 6 11 45.54 34.37 n/a
9 PSP Handscomb 27 5 8 45.12 38.65 39
10 MP Stoinis 29 4 7 42.57 33.61 n/a Allrounder
11 GJ Maxwell 30 2 4 42 41.1 26.07
12 CL White 35 5 8 41.85 40.38 29.2
13 MC Henriques 32 6 10 41.2 34.49 23.42 Allrounder
* M Labuschagne 24 5 9 28.22 33.17 20.25 Golden Boy
* Mitchell Marsh 27 4 7 37.71 31.93 26.08 Blessed

Most glaring stat is obviously Marnus Labuschagne in light of his 1) ever being selected to play for Australia and 2) that rumours say he's about to get another chance.

2nd most glaring stat: there are 3 vastly better "allrounders" available for selection.

I've let Maxwell through even though he's only played 2 matches. Gotta feel for Maxwell as he's another who's been O'Keefed in this era of the ACB in-club. Also in there is Cam White, another who's proven himself statistically but has never been given the opportunities the "blessed ones" have. He's probably too old now for selection but good on him and shame Test selectors.

Good to see Wade's still going strong should Paine stumble.

That leaves Patterson at the head of a handy bunch of batsmen. In order: Patterson, Burns, Hughes, Lehmann, Cooper and Handscomb. It's from that bunch the next Test batsman must be chosen and *not* Labuschagne.

If Labuschagne is selcted I want the selectors to explain how he will defy his career stats to now and suddenly become a 40 plus Test batsman. If he's in for his bowling as well then I want them to explain why he comes in ahead of 3 vastly better allrounders.


Smith can, and probably will be captain again. The terms of his ban say that he can’t hold a leadership position within a year after his ban, but after that he’s fine. It’s Warner who is barred from that.

It might be interesting to see whether they consider Bancroft with the bat again, and if so, when. As we’ve seen, no one’s really put their hand up at all in this series. At all - young, old, experienced or inexperienced. There could be an argument to replace every one of them. They won’t go that way of course, but there isn’t a single batsman in this side that has enhanced their reputation this series. I’d argue that it’s Marsh and Khawaja that have been the most disappointing, though - we needed more from them.

I wouldn’t get TOO carried away about our batting stocks, though. There isn’t a side in world cricket that wouldn’t suffer hugely from removing three established top order players, and particularly players of the likes of Smith and Warner. Where would India be if you took out Kohli and Pujara for a year? South Africa without Elgar and du Plessis? New Zealand without Taylor and Williamson? We were always going to suffer from that decision.

I am Not Trampis

I would not let smith anywhere near the captaincy.

He simply does not understand what the spirit of cricket is. Warner never has. how he was ever V/C is a complete and utter joke


March 2020 is a long time away. No one’s suggesting that he’ll just walk right back into the role, either - it could be that there isn’t a vacancy for awhile after that anyway. Looking at it though - who else is a candidate for the captaincy at the moment after Paine? No one, and er - no one.

If we can forgive Warne for all of his indiscretions, we’ll forgive Smith. I’m sure he’ll be back.


Cummins the hour Cummins the man. Buggers my prediction of next years Ashes though.
Also the talk of India's strength beucase of population is a joke. All Blacks anyone?
Starc needs a talking to. He cant keep playing those type of shots "because thats how he plays". Doesnt excuse the batsmen, but putting value on his wicket would asisst us presently.

I am Not Trampis

I have forgiven him but his behaviour as Captain on that occasion mean never to captain again. play for sure but never captain


Just caught the tail end of the ABC cricket commentary and they were talking about a "dearth of spin bowlers" in the Shield at the moment.

Don't know who they were but the expert/ex-cricketer was asked to nominate who's the best and on the fringes for selection. Agar was mentioned, but he then nominated John Holland as being #1 choice.

He then noted that, elephant in the room, Steve O'Keefe has "a phenomenal record at the SCG". I might add, he also has the equivalent 1st class bowling stats as Warne and Magilla. He also when finally selected almost single-handedly defeated India in the first test of a series in India.

Forget about the suspensions given to Smith, Warner and Bancroft, O'Keefe has suffered a sureptitious life-time ban from the In-Club/cognoscenti for telling it like it is when he's had a few. Big no-no in the pantheon of Cricket's elite wankers.

As the cricket expert on ABC noted as a positive attribute of another possible spin bowling selection, "he knows how the dressing room works".

There you have it.

We do not select the best cricketers to represent Australia. We select from a conga line of suckholes who "know how the dressing room works".

Tony Tea

Pat Cummins should be captain. He does all the work.


Uh-oh http://www.espncricinfo.com/story/_/id/25637246/india-furious-kerry-okeeffe-jalandhar-railways-canteen-staff-jibe

What is it with the name O'Keefe?

SB: "Hey Duke, Racism is not light-hearted and fun. Only if we stop this now, it won't pass on to the future generation. Racism is not taken seriously in‌ cricket like in other sports. People get away with it."

It's racist now to suspect a triple century was against sub-optimal opposition?

Btw, it's not often one gets to praise Melbourne for its weather but credit where credit's due. If only the top order could have hung about a bit longer.

I am Not Trampis

Tones how about a special name your own Aussie team article.

I think it should be a tram of Marshes. first test to be all over in a day

Tony Tea

A toilet of Marshes.

Tony Tea

What O'Keefe said is not of itself racist. It's just a jibe that Agarwal would have main a lot of runs against weak teams. But I didn't hear it, or the other thing abou Che-poo.

I am Not Trampis

Tonee right again.

O'Keefe's main problem is that he thinks he is funny and thus is always trying to be funny. He was this time but it wasn't.


Here's the tour batting averages compared to 1st Class and Test averages

Order Name State Tests 1st Class Tour Difference 1st Difference Tests
1 Marcus Harris WA 35.5 35.49 29.5 -5.99 -6
2 Aaron Finch Vic 33.37 35.95 16.16 -19.79 -17.21
3 Usman Khawaja NSW 42.8 43.87 27.83 -16.04 -14.97
4 Shaun Marsh WA 34.82 41 29.16 -11.84 -5.66
5 Travis Head SA 35.62 36.94 36.16 -0.78 0.54
6 Mitchell Marsh (a) WA 26.08 31.93 9.5 -22.43 -16.58
7 Tim Paine (w) TAS 36.91 29.95 28.16 -1.79 -8.75
8 Pat Cummins NSW 19.22 23.72 23 -0.72 3.78
9 Mitchell Starc NSW 20.91 21.74 17.6 -4.14 -3.31
10 Nathan Lyon NSW 12.53 13.07 27.66 14.59 15.13
11 Josh Hazlewood NSW 12.65 12.38 7.5 -4.88 -5.15
Total 310.41 326.04 244.73 -81.31 -65.68

Peter Handscomb VIC 39 38.65 17 -21.65 -22

Sorry about the formatting.

The team collectively is down 81 on 1st class averages and 65 on Test averages. The biggest failures against 1st class stats in order are: 1) #2 Son of Swampy at -22.43 2) Finch at -19.79 3) The Next Don Bradman at -16.79 4) #1 Son of Swampy at -11.84 and 5) Harris at -6

Best performers of the batsmen is Head at -0.78 and +0.54 improved on his Test average. His inclusion can be considered a success. Paine is 2nd at -1.79 on 1st class stats which is considered as expected in the normal world. In the normal world we expect a batsman to perform at or *below* 1st class average when stepping up a class. It's the same expectation as in say horseracing. A step up in class means better competition and naturally your average will suffer. So in that regard Paine overall has performed above and beyond expectations given his Test average is +6.96 on his 1st class average. Well done Paine!

The biggest disappointments with the same normal understanding in mind are Sons of Swampy and The Next Don who perform considerably below 1st class averages.

No one ever expected Finch to perform in his role as he's proven throughout his career that he's not a long format opener. His average attests to that. But, he actually performs just under his 1st class average in Tests and within acceptable range. So, also well done Finch. He performed within expectations.

Only in the world of TV and radio panels of ex-international cricketers as well as the Australian selectors are players expected to perform above and beyond the statistical benchmark those players averages indicate is the level of their talent.

We're looking forward to further squandering of opportunities to blood talent at the SCG Test since there is nothing the cognoscenti and selectors love more than doubling down on their stupidity and incestuous in-group behaviour patterns.

Tony Tea

I would love to know the selectors' thinking behind Finch.


A toilet of Marshes. Love it!

O'Keefe's main problem is that he thinks he is funny and thus is always trying to be funny. He was this time but it wasn't. I've completely given up on listening to the commentary. I turn the sound off and just listen to albums on spotify.

One thing I did like on the Fox broadcast when at my parent's who still have the commentary on was the live stump mic. Not so much for listening to the players but just the silence and just background ground noise. It was very relaxing and reminded me of the game when I was a lad and watching it at my grandparent's. Great innovation which we need more of.

I am Not Trampis

On Finch,
it made sense to open in UAE ( which is NOT the sub-continent) as the ball does not swing much at all.

Not here though. If it did wouldn't he open for his state.

seems to me you forget about people who have not performed and stick with new players whom you think will.

Take Chappelli . He did not become a test batsman until 1968/69. Risky did not until 1957 in SA

I am Not Trampis

I should add one positive byprpduct of India of Kholi being Captain given he is a fitness fanatic is that the Indian team are far more athletic these days. Much better at both fielding and running between the wickets

Tony Tea

The Victorian hierarchy were adamant the selectors were setting Finch up to fail. They said exactly what you said, Homer. Finch is good to spin, but rubbish to swing.

I am Not Trampis

I am no expert on Finch but he has a decent shield record batting down the order. Opening in white ball cricket is not the samw as red ball. You do not need a tight batting technique. Batting Sharma say no more.

Set up to fail sounds about right.

moreover with no large changes for Sydanee means most will play against the three Lankans and make a killing.
They go to england and the popms make a killing assuming same p itches as against India


It makes sense to set people up to fail if they’re looking ultimately to bring Smith and Warner straight back in. That way their “rehabilitation” - shit, I hate that word in connection with this story - is complete. They don’t only come back because their bans are up but because we really, really need them, they tried EVERYTHING to find replacements but no one was good enough. That would also explain the continued non-selection of Maxwell, which I really don’t get. He always seems to be the next cab off the rank, but then oh look, there are suddenly three guys in front of him when a spot opens up. Quite how Langer was able to push Marsh back into the side (and it can only have been Langer, it has his grubby fingerprints all over it) is beyond me.


I have now heard Allan Border and Ian Chappell advocating putting Cummins in a seven and playing an extra bowler. Which is just about the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard, particularly under the current circumstances. WE HAVE NO BATTING, and you want to lengthen the tail? Furthermore, we HAD the “extra bowler” in Melbourne in the form of Mitch Marsh, and look where that got us. Christ on a bike. Leave Cummins where he is, and pick an actual top 6!

The Mongrel

Carrot: they tried EVERYTHING to find replacements but no one was good enough.

The Simpsons: We’ve tried nothing and we’re all out of ideas!



If Gilly wasnt picked at no.6, how on God's earth could Paine play there and Cummins at 7. The best ever played no. 7. Paine is not better than Gilly. Who has the best batting average at the SCG. Pick him. Unfortunately its probably Smith or Warner. So pick next in line, not some pseudo all rounder whio hasnt taken wickets or scored runs.
Selectors should not be paid when we lose.Simple


Hah - Mongrel, I remember that episode and use that quote often! Gold.


Just reading up on the latest cricket news. A couple of points:

1) In the video interview with ChappellI at Crookinfo the subject of Ozzie batting woes he says:

"You are looking at replacing guys who are averaging in the mid 30s in first class cricket with other guys who are averaging about the same in first class cricket. That's when you know you've got a real problem."

[Nominates Finch and Mitch Marsh to be dropped for Sydney.]

But, ah, who you replace them with...well..pull a name out of a hat.

But this is not true. The Shield stats are readily available and there are 13 players averaging over 40 (some like Patterson and Burns with a standard 1st class average over 40). The best performing batsman in order are:

1 Matthew Wade 63.44
2 Marcus Harris 71.57
3 Michael Neser 52
4 KR Patterson 47.55
5 JA Burns 47.2
6 DP Hughes 46.2
7 Jake Lehmann 46.1
8 TLW Cooper 45.54
9 PSP Handscomb 45.12
10 MP Stoinis 42.57
11 GJ Maxwell 42
12 CL White 41.85
13 MC Henriques 41.2

No hat required: replace Finch with Joe Burns.

Wade to replace Paine the minute Paine returns to 1st class averages form.

Patterson in for Smarsh in answer to longterm goals re. this excellent article https://www.smh.com.au/sport/cricket/short-sighted-selectors-should-have-picked-team-for-birmingham-20181230-p50ou3.html.

2) Allrounder.

The best allrounder in the Shield is Queensland's Michael Neser. Currently averaging 52 with the bat this season and 32.46 with the ball. 1st class bat = 26.45 and ball = 30.15.

The 2nd best allrounder is Marcus Stoinis. Currently averaging 42.57 with the bat this season and 25.2 with the ball. 1st class bat = 33.61 and ball = 42.36.

There is daylight between these two and the rest. Mitch Marsh should never have been selected. Stoinis was my choice.

Now, here's the kicker: "Australia have added allrounder Marnus Labuschagne to their squad for the final Test against India in Sydney" (http://www.espncricinfo.com/story/_/id/25642372/australia-call-marnus-labuschagne-mitchell-marsh-slumps)

Marnus Labuschagne is not an allrounder. His current Shield bowling is 59.60 and doesn't even make it onto the Shield stats table for best bowling averages. His current Shield batting is 28.22 - 8 positions above Finch and 11 above Steve O'Keefe on 24.66. O'Keefe's bowling is currently 44.14, not great but vastly superior to Labuschagne. Furthermore, O'Keefe has great stats at the SCG and Tests against India!

Steve O'Keefe is not an allrounder and neither is Labuschagne.

Picking on form Burns replaces Finch and Patterson replaces Shaun Marsh.

Possibly drop Hazelewood and bring in O'Keefe and replace M Marsh's slot Lehman or Stoinis.

The two teams are:

SCG Australia 1 2018/2019
Order Name State Tests 1st Class
1 Marcus Harris WA 35.5 35.49
2 Joe Burns QLD 36.76 40.58
3 Usman Khawaja NSW 42.8 43.87
4 Kurtis Patterson NSW n/a 41
5 Travis Head SA 35.62 36.94
6 Marcus Stoinis VIC n/a 33.61
7 Tim Paine (w) TAS 36.91 29.95
8 Pat Cummins NSW 19.22 23.72
9 Mitchell Starc NSW 20.91 21.74
10 Steve O'Keefe NSW 9.55 27.52
11 Nathan Lyon NSW 12.53 13.07
Total 249.8 347.49

SCG Australia 2 2018/2019
Order Name State Tests 1st Class
1 Marcus Harris WA 35.5 35.49
2 Joe Burns QLD 36.76 40.58
3 Usman Khawaja NSW 42.8 43.87
4 Kurtis Patterson NSW n/a 41
5 Travis Head SA 35.62 36.94
6 Jake Lehmann SA n/a 39.62
7 Tim Paine (w) TAS 36.91 29.95
8 Pat Cummins NSW 19.22 23.72
9 Mitchell Starc NSW 20.91 21.74
10 Steve O'Keefe NSW 9.55 27.52
11 Nathan Lyon NSW 12.53 13.07
Total 249.8 353.5

Both teams are statistically 50 runs better than the MCG team and have several players currently averaging over 40 or more in 1st class, contrary to what ChappellI imagines the stats to be.

Tony Tea

This is Knoxy's top six: "Marcus Harris and Travis Head are on the right track. Those two, and Khawaja, ought to be joined in Brisbane by a group drawn from Kurtis Patterson, Matthew Renshaw, Alex Doolan, Joe Burns and Jake Lehmann, with Cameron Bancroft and possibly Jason Sangha."


The Alex Doolan inclusion threw me big time.

I am Not Trampis

We do not have allrounders. some are batsmen who can bowl and others are bowlers who can bat.

Tony Tea

Are all rounders more of an overseas thing? I mean with all the work load management and the very hot days on hard grounds just not not being conducive to Aussie all rounders. Keith Miller got by on raw talent. Richie was a spinner. Gilly was a keeper. Best pick four good bowlers who can bat a bit, unless they are so good with the ball that you needn't worry about his batting.

Tony Tea

Doolan's been pretty good in the Shield.

I am Not Trampis

Wade is not as good a keeper as Paine although he wasn't at his best at the G mind few were. Perhaps Wade as a batsman here but not in England.
Please just choose people who have a tight technique. I hear Burns has tightened up quite a bit since his sacking.

I know I rant on about technique but if it is not there it is leading lambs to the slaughter.

The other thing is I underestimated the Indian attack. I thought they would come to Australia and simply bowl short and get hit as usual. They did not. Bumrah is a great leader of the pack as well.

I am not a selector. They would or should have been poring over the series agin the Poms and Aardvarks. They obviously did not

I am Not Trampis

Keith Miler was not an allrounder nor was Risky. They were both bowlers who could bat. Miller could have been if he had batted at 6 and not 4. Remember under the Invincibles Lindwall and Tallon scored more runs.

Tony Tea

We were completely outbowled by the Indian quicks. Apparently district cricket, first class and international umpire have been told to crack down on ball shiners who chew lollies. As a result the Aussies are shit scared of any kind of maltreatment of the agate.


As i said before if we were batting against our bowlers we wouldnt reach 150. And clearly Warner was the greatest ball shiner of all time. Whatever he did before, its not happening now.

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