THIRD TEST: ADELAIDE OVAL

Forget Australia's pathetic cricket in the first two Tests, the subsequent selectors' scythe and any prospects for the Third Test, the following article is 100% rolled-gold LOOK OVER THERE! I love it. Ben Horne, you win this week's internet:

South Africa captain Faf du Plessis hit with fine but free to face Aussies in Adelaide

The smug South African captain

smashed with a fine

Du Plessis... with his reputation now in tatters

the sooky Proteas

South Africa are filthy with the result

Du Plessis was already a self-confessed ball tamperer

ICC bizarrely treated lollygate as a first offence

damning television footage

tried to turn the hearing into a forensic case and force the ICC to prove that the practice actually made a tangible difference to the ball swinging

ICC skewered du Plessis based on his flagrant abuse of the spirit of cricket

umpires had no hesitation in branding du Plessis guilty

du Plessis looked ashen faced

South Africa’s arrogant and self-righteous attitude

The Proteas argument was not that du Plessis was innocent but that everybody else does it, so why should they be targeted?

“you see it daily with those type of incidences taking place on the field.”

South Africa’s only argument appears to be that everybody else in world cricket uses the tactics employed by du Plessis

Comments

[Tony Tea]

So, basically, mints don't work but everyone does it. Flaws, much?

[Tony Tea]

Barry Richards: “My bat edges were 18 millimetres and David Warner’s is 60 and no one says a word." #LookOverThere #SookySouthAfricans

[Tony Tea]

Actually, one question about the Third Test: Will the sooky South Africans be arrogant and self-righteous enough to tamper with the ball in Adelaide?

[Tony Tea]

South Africa's 20 year absence from cricket meant they missed the classes in which you learn how to invent convincing excuses.

[Tony Tea]

Read this, you c***s.

[Philsgone]

Good chance for a smart lolly maker to sponsor the non existent everyone does it ball ampering. "This inswinger bought to you by Mentos"

[I am and will always be Not Trampis]

This was a joke against Du Plessis. the Umpires are required to inspect the ball every so often. They do it after every wicket and they did not do a thing . In other words they saw nothing wrong with the ball.

how can the man be gulity then unless the Umpires were incompetent

[Tony Tea]

TV is king, Homer. The umpires had no hesitation in branding du Plessis guilty... when they saw the footage.

[I am and will always be Not Trampis]

The footage does not matter. What matters is the condition of the ball and they must have said it was okay. If not they could have awarded 5 penalty runs to Australia and asked for another ball.

They did not. ipsofacto the ball was not tampered with!

[Carrot]

Potential test of the day/night format coming up. We saw last year that a lot of wickets fell under lights here. If we knock South Africa over in the next hour or so, there's the possibility of a very tricky half session or so against the new ball under lights.

[Tony Tea]

None for at stumps. 3 off 39 and 8 off 34. Where have you been, my precious ones?

[lou]

TT, that article is very funny.

[I am and will always be Not Trampis]

Sensational strategy by Smith, Warner ans Boof. Why is the youg SA bnowler the onlt SA bowler able to swing the ball?

[I am and will always be Not Trampis]

I am with Keith Miller who thought a decent batsman in Australia should be able to play a finger spinner here with a toothpick!

Is there any wrist spinner on the horizon?

Having sad that Ali should bowl better in Australia as he uses flight a lot more. That doesn't mean he should take wickets though.

[Philsgone]

I like Faf's work. Bstted very well, then shows he is a cloever bastard as well. Lot to like about him.

[I am and will always be Not Trampis]

I agree with Chappelli. Faff should be captain even when AB comes back.

one hell of a test side!

[Philsgone]

Well if yesterday is the blueprint for the future. then we have a lot to look forward to,

[Bruce]

Bat all day to make a hundred.

Oh how I love Usman right now.

[Professor Rosseforp]

Brilliant opening bowling session on the first day by the Pink Ball. This is ball-tampering legitimised. When I saw Nathan Lyon get a massive swing going (not swing generated by spin on the ball, but paceman's swing, I know that lollygate was just all confection.
By the way, congrats to Faff for showing the benefits of sugar after Peter Fitzsimons had given it such a terrible serve in the media on the weekend (no doubt in time for the Christmas market and his new book).
Questions still linger, though.
Do the sugar-free mints have the same sweet spot that sugary lollies do? Do diabetics now have a reduced career expectancy in cricket?

[Carrot]

Come on, Stephen Cook! There's always something about a player with a slightly dodgy technique, particularly when they cop a pasting from the commentators - Kevin Pietersen, I'm looking at you.

[m0nty]

If only the selectors had picked that side for the first test. Apart from Maddinson of course, who is not fit for beach cricket.