SOFTLY, SOFTLY, SPANKY MONKEY

Sachin Tendulkar has pretty much kept his opinions to himself. Apart from changing his evidence. But now he has a book to promote:

Sachin Tendulkar blasts Michael Clarke, Ricky Ponting over Monkeygate

SACHIN Tendulkar has launched an attack on the integrity of Australian captain Michael Clarke, his predecessor Ricky Ponting and Adam Gilchrist over 2008’s “Monkeygate” ugliness.

Oh, and there's a Test series against India coming up.

Comments

[Mattq]

Never brought into the Tendulkar cult. Great batsman and all, but ...

[gillysgone]

th elittle master spreading a little mischief. Looks like the PR team want to stir up some pre tour aggro by the Indians

[m0nty]

I like how TLM thinks that his contention that Harbajhan actually called Symonds a cvnt is somehow an argument on behalf of his side.

[Big Rammer's mum]

Charming non-hypocritical bunch, the Indians.

How old do you reckon the chief organ grinder is? 40? Look at him there with his whistle.

[Big Ramifications]

What comes after a launched attack?

I believe it's a furor.

[Oscar gone Wilde]

With the news that "AC/DC drummer Phil Rudd gets charged with attempting to procure a murder" I was surprised that no subeditor could come up with the obvious byline:

Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap

[Tony Tea]

What comes after a launched attack? Blow back: "Sachin Tendulkar book: Indian great has been revealed as a political animal with shameless attacks on former opponents, says Robert Craddock."

[Carrot]

It's interesting to read that they were serious about calling off the tour, and it only goes to prove what a bunch of self-righteous, shrill little arseholes they all were, from the board down (have I mentioned that I hate the BCCI?). That whole episode STILL gets me worked up. I think in hindsight I'm most disappointed in how the Australian set-up handled it though, and the way they played a completely smarmy "nice guys" card at the WACA - and lost! If I genuinely believed that an opposition player had used a word like that on one of my team-mates, I'd be struggling to even speak to them let alone visit the dressing-room and put in a big show of congratulating them for a win.

What I still don't get though, is how blokes like Sachin can't at least understand where we were coming from. Whether Rollerboy said "maaki" or not, there has to be room somewhere for them to understand that our guys genuinely thought different, and acted accordingly. Of course the gloves would come off - why wouldn't they? "Oh no - he's just racially abused one of our guys - AGAIN - but that's ok, we have to keep the SPIRIT OF CRICKET in mind. Well played, bravo, good shot!". Please.

SRT is right about one thing, though - the umpires did completely lose it. You can perhaps understand though, can you imagine what it would have been like to umpire a game when we were going for blood, with the backdrop of a racial abuse furore going on? I'd love to listen to the stump mike audio of the last afternoon, I'm sure it wasn't pretty.

[Carrot]

Oh, and another thing - the "how dare they question our integrity" idea, both then and now. Somehow we're just supposed to understand that Indian cricketers are a better class of human being, and above scrutiny on that basis.

The BCCI were going through a ridiculous period at that stage where they'd completely lose it if any of their players got sanctioned, seemingly with no more than the argument of "because he's Indian and he'd NEVER misbehave". Thankfully they've stopped threatening to call of tours and/or boycott matches, but they're still being dickheads when they can - witness the ridiculous episode with Jadeja and Anderson in the last English summer. Just ..... so fucking stupid.

WANKERS!

[Tony Tea]

That "he's Indian and he'd NEVER misbehave" is like when the commentators go "That is a MASSIVE APPEAL!!! They are ABSOLUTELY CONVINCED he got an edge. He MUST BE OUT!!!" Only for the replay to clearly show he's not out.

[Oscar gone Wilde]

TLM is a shrewd businessman. He and the Don share a lot more in common than their batting and mutual admiration.

[Oscar gone Wilde]

"the "how dare they question our integrity" idea"

You should try shopping in Delhi.

[Oscar gone Wilde]

Well, actually, you shouldn't try shopping in Delhi.

At the risk of offending m0nty and Rammers, that attitude you describe is an Indian trait in all matters personal and business. (Indians generally don't divide the personal and business. Everything is business with an Indian.)

The faux outrage and pretense at being personally offended is merely part of the toing and froing of their haggling system. Once you understand the gambit you can get some pretty good deals. Though it's better to use a local. They can see you coming a mile off - to them you're like a walking goldmine.

[Tony Tea]

"The faux outrage and pretense at being personally offended is merely part of the toing and froing of their haggling system."

Spot on, Oscar me old grouch. And not just their haggling. It's a KPI of everyone who wants something in this turf war we call the modern res publica.

[Big Ramifications]

Dammit. I got busted. Sorry mum.

http://www.outtraveler.com/destination-guide/las-vegas/2013/10/14/failure-downtown-vegas-gay-clubs-has-big-ramifications

[Oscar gone Wilde]

For your edification, Cameron and I have selected the best performed, statistically, Oz team:

1) Dave Warner
2) Phil Hughes
3) Mark Cosgrove
4) Steve Smith
5) Marcus North (c)
6) Peter Nevill or Chris Hartley
7) Mitch Marsh
8) Mitchell Johnson
9) Ryan Harris
10) Steve O'Keefe
11) Jason Paul Behrendorff
12) Luke Pomersbach (lured out of retirement)

Cosgrove finally gets his chance.

Sheffield Shield, 2013/14 _Highest averages

[Oscar gone Wilde]

Late mail from Cameron: Maybe one variation is Hughes at #3 and Chris Lynn opener, when fit.

[Hangover Black]

"How dare they question our integrity!" - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eoc_RqY6yws

[m0nty]

I lived in India for two years, Pat. I know what you're talking about.

We're all political animals. Some of us are wild dogs. Some of us like to think we're king of the jungle, or at least Maharajah of the Red Fort. Half their gods are half-animal. Brings to mind the Test Match Sofa blokes taking the piss out of Ravi Shastri saying "imperious". The Little Mouse That Roared, indeed.

[Imperious Tea]

Malcolm Knox, always straight as a die, speaks volumes without speaking volumes: Is Sachin Tendulkar rewriting cricket history?

PS: I was conceived in India.

[Tony Tea]

Then board member, AB:

“I thought we let the players down badly then. Australians have copped our brickbats over the years for being aggressive and in-your-face and playing that style of game that a lot of people didn’t like. We encouraged the players to clean the game up and report certain incidents but when they did report the alleged abuse it turned 180 degrees. The backroom deals were done, and I was out of my depth. They made the commercial decision, not the ethical/moral decision. We’d have a massive financial hole if the Indians went home, and we couldn’t afford it. As a board member I was really disappointed but the initial agitation dies down when you start getting those commercial realities. What price do you put on these things?”

[Oscar gone Wilde]

“I thought we let the players down badly then. Australians have copped our brickbats over the years for being aggressive and in-your-face and playing that style of game that a lot of people didn’t like. We encouraged the players to clean the game up and report certain incidents but when they did report the alleged abuse it turned 180 degrees. The backroom deals were done, and I was out of my depth. They made the commercial decision, not the ethical/moral decision. We’d have a massive financial hole if the Indians went home, and we couldn’t afford it. As a board member I was really disappointed but the initial agitation dies down when you start getting those commercial realities. What price do you put on these things?”

Christ Almighty!

It's as if I just read the epitaph on the Western grave after Stalingrad.

Lift Him up.

We salute you, AB.

[Tony Tea]

More from AB.

[Tony Tea]

This part has me scratching my head:

The downgrading of the charge enraged the Australian players, but Hansen criticised Symonds for misinterpreting the initial action by Harbhajan to Lee, the pat on the backside: ‘Anyone observing this incident would take it to be a clear acknowledgment of “well bowled”.’

How many batsmen hit a boundary then say “well bowled” to the bowler as is if they really meant “well bowled”? None. They are razzing the bowler. Firms up my belief Hansen was sent in to find reasons to hose down the findings.

[m0nty]

Steve Waugh speaks on the Test squad... and spruiks for four NSW (current/former) players: Our Phil Hughes (Macksville, Wests), Spearmint (born in Sydney), Josh Hazlewood (Tamworth, St George) and Uzzie (Randwick Petersham via Islamabad). You could knock me down with a monkey's paw.

[Big Ramifications]

I'm still trying to figure out the huge man crush he had on Gavin Robertson. Shield bowling average of 42.

[lou]

And Junior is in love with Sean Abbott, I'm sure if Marsh gets injured, he'll be spruiking to get him jumped in that pointless all-rounder queue headed by IPCoS.

Rod Marsh may end up giving him a baggy green just to shut up Afghanistan.

[Cameron]

Tendulkar is overrated. Selfish batsman, always filled his pocket, left the tail out to dry, horrible in the clutch.

[Cameron]

Lara is the best batsman i've seen fwiw.

Great clutch batsman. Could take a game way in a session.

You never feared Tendulkar, flat track 2-250 bully.

[gillysgone]

Agree, Lara, Ponting than Tendulkar. No argument

[Tony Tea]

I would have got him out.

[gillysgone]

On a green top in Brisbane or a bunsen in Chennai?

[Big Ramifications]

I've got de Kock out.

https://www.facebook.com/pages/I-love-de-Kock/376559992501679