THIRD TEST: THE WACA

Nervous. Too much hype. Too much "England are gone". Too much "foregone conclusion". Too much "5-0".

Comments

[Tony Tea]

Not much mention of "momentum" but.

[m0nty]

Wayne Newton's law of momentum says that the media only cares about momentum when they think it's changing.

[Russ]

As ought to be obvious from its derivation, momentum only tells you what is happening in the moment.

Anyway, let's talk pitch.

Traditional Perth fast pitch guff is in the air. I think it will start slow, because they'll be worried about the heat and left some moisture in it. Good chance to bowl if you do it right; will quicken and bat like a dream for three days and then? Remember the good old days when the WACA pitch cracked and the ball would go missing is some chasm? It isn't quite as hot as in 96-97 - then it was 42 - but I don't think this is a pitch to bat last on.

Broad is the worry (and Finn and Rankin if they play). If ever a pitch favoured height and pace it is this one.

[Tony Tea]

Since the WACA pitch was renovated in the mid-80s any talk about its famed pace is in direct contrast to its actual pace. The more you talk it up, the easier it plays. Barring the odd pitch malfunction, of course.

[gillysgone]

Harris fit = Harris not fit but we will pick him = a bowler short.
Need a spinner = dont need a spinner but we play one = not even Warnie got many wickets at the WACA.
Luck on our side = luck can change mighty fast = luck on their side
This test could be a nightmare or a glorious dream for us. Eaither way will not surprice me.

[m0nty]

??% of Spearmint, 100% of Doug the Rug or 100% of the National Coulter Network. Tough choice.

[Shep]

We bat. Unchanged line-up for Australia. Bresnan in for Monty for the Poms. Hopefully Harris gets another couple of days to put his feet up.

[nottrampis]

you guys are a bit late!! But I still got you in.

By the way Clarke didn't win the toss Cook lost the toss!

[m0nty]

Three tosses in a row, luck is being a lady of the night.

[m0nty]

Malfoy trying to pitch it up, but his line is filthy.

[m0nty]

Ah crap, that's the sort of thing that can turn a series.

[m0nty]

These Poms, they never miss.

[@Footy_Maths]

Someone stealing your stuff Tone...?

Oh dear... Time for #WattoLotto - name the number of runs he'll get. Of course the rule is it'll be under 50.. @abcgrandstand @TestMatchSofa

— Francis Leach (@SaintFrankly) December 13, 2013

[m0nty]

More luck for Cow Corner, if that was Cook it would have gone onto the stumps.

[m0nty]

Pitch maps and Hawkeye shows Neo is moving it ever so slightly and Malfoy not at all, but neither has any control, the lines are all over the place and way too short.

[Tony Tea]

Don't you just hate run outs.

[m0nty]

They'll relax the fielding restrictions soon and we can pick off the ones before the big push leading up to the 50th over.

[m0nty]

Watto's Waste.

[Russ]

Three choices of audio today. Gave up on the BBC because of Blowers.

Some rugged strine on the commercial channel.

Paper Cut, having a terrible series.

[Tony Tea]

About time to give up on Paper Cut and pick a proper batsman.

[m0nty]

And again the nation looks to Michael "Joe DiMaggio" Clarke to pull us out of the bog.

[gillysgone]

its the end of Paper Cut as we know it, its the end of Paper Cut as we know it, and I feel fine

[m0nty]

Clarke Time approaching and we're lacking concentration. Danger danger.

[m0nty]

Wait, it's not Clarke Time, still half an hour to go in the session.

[Russ]

It is confusing because they started at 10:30 and England are bowling at 11 1/2 overs per hour... in the morning no less. What will they do when they are hot and tired?

[m0nty]

Didn't know Stokes the Grey could bowl at 140kph. Nice bouncer.

[gillysgone]

why bring a few 2 metere tall bowlers and pick none in Perth? Are they saving them for the SCG?

[m0nty]

KOKhead is getting way too triumphalist. Long way to go yet.

[m0nty]

Clarke Time strikes again, classic example.

[Russ]

Still on commercial radio. Ads are annoying. But the commentary is actually largely good.

[Tony Tea]

Textbook Clarke time.

[Tony Tea]

Giving your wicket away to Swann who is bowling a couple of speculative overs before the break is a horrendous blunder.

[m0nty]

If we lose this test and/or series, that will become the archetypal Clarke Time example.

[Tony Tea]

Warner better not get himself out before lunch.

[M. Patard]

Well, it's all back to formula.

Sub 200 total in sight, possibly even 150.

Skin Folds needs to get a ton. If he does so he's cemented his place for a long time.

Paper Cut has to go, the only thing keeping him there his batting. Drop him back to six? Or get Jordan Silk in?

[M. Patard]

the only thing keeping him there his batting.

I meant bowling.

[Tony Tea]

We go to lunch at 2/107 and it's a gun start.

We go to lunch at 3/107 and it's a wobbly start.

It's a funny game, cricket.

[m0nty]

Is Silk ready yet? Surely he needs to hit at least 30 years of age before we'll consider him.

[M. Patard]

Haven't seen a wicket yet, but from what I've heard and the little I saw, we gave it all away. The pitch is doing nothing. It's a batsman's paradise. We are throwing away momentum.

[M. Patard]

Is Silk ready yet? Surely he needs to hit at least 30 years of age before we'll consider him.

Ha, ha. Good point.

[M. Patard]

Harris fit = Harris not fit but we will pick him = a bowler short.
Need a spinner = dont need a spinner but we play one = not even Warnie got many wickets at the WACA.
Luck on our side = luck can change mighty fast = luck on their side

One of the best summations I have read at AGB to this moment(um).

[M. Patard]

At this rate, 9/321 at stumps. I'd settle for that.

[2BarRiff]

The commercial radio is doing quite well. The ads are balanced off by better commentary and regular score updates.

Anyone thinking Aus were trying to push the run rate a little too hard?

[M. Patard]

Straight down his throat.

[gillysgone]

phuck Warner gone. We are stuffed. thanks M. Patard re your comment

[M. Patard]

This is it. This is the partnership that says we are back as contenders or just ran into some lucky hot form for two Tests.

[M. Patard]

Ahhhhh, shit.

[Russ]

Quite. Pat. Awful cricket today. Now need the bowlers to rescue things.

[M. Patard]

Not even halfway through the day and we're halfway out. Ridiculous, unthinking, emotional, hubristic and dumb batting.

[M. Patard]

Geez Squinty is in the luckiest form of his life.

[Tony Tea]

England set to retain the Ashes.

Mind you, we batted like shit on the first day of the equivalent Test in 2006. Oh, who am I kidding? This series is cooked. England will win enough Tests to retain the Ashes.

[Tony Tea]

I would listen to AW full time if it was not for the ads. Pretty good. Mickey Arthur is a batter commentator than coach. Come to think of it, what is Tim Neilsen doing now?

[M. Patard]

Goddammit Nein with these replays. Gonna give me a heart attack one of these days when I walk back on to the deck.

Still, 5 down. All looking good for a relaxing ad break.

[The Mongrel]

Time to throw to the video (NSFW)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6Vw7tQztpk

[Tony Tea]

Of course, when we lise we can blame 3AW. The last call I remember they did was the Windies in 1988/89.

[M. Patard]

Hang in there to Tea, lads. And, the rest of you, listen to that Iggy Pop album. Just right for the day's play, so many moods.

In the meantime, here's a channel Billed Cuckoo juvenile picking on its poor old misguided Magpie parents.

They're all around here at the moment. Monstrous birds that cuckold the parents, and when the other chicks are born chucks them from the nest. The unknowingly adopted parents starve themselves to death to feed the beasts.

Makes me feel right at home in modern Australia.

[M. Patard]

Sorry, the adopters are Currawongs.

[Tony Tea]

Bloody hell. It us an old school one day match.

[Carrot]

England looked like they were tiring and running out of ideas in the heat towards the end of that session. Warnie's right, the longer we can keep them out there the more easy runs we should get. By the way - over-rate???

How much does batting first and having your feet up for a day make a difference to a guy like Rhino? Is it that significant?

[M. Patard]

We will be all out by stumps, Carrot.

[Tony Tea]

Nothing dopey, please, Klutzy.

[David]

Careful Squinty

[M. Patard]

I don't want to preempt this, by God I don't want to preempt this, but, if Skin Folds gets a ton we need a maximum grandiose song to ring it in with.

Get one ready, Tones.

[Tony Tea]

That would have been utter SGW.

[Tony Tea]

I don't know from maximum grandiose.

[M. Patard]

grandiose x maximum.

Get one ready.

[M. Patard]

Just throwing this one out there, by way of build up.

[M. Patard]

66.2 Broad to Smith, FOUR, *tears up plan* too short and wide and Smith rocks back to thrash four through backward point

Thrash. Good adverb.

[Tony Tea]

Warnie hates Bowden. Warnie has too many pet animosities and grudge to be a truly good commentator.

[M. Patard]

I hate Bowden.

And I've got a truckload of animosities and grudges to go with it.

[Shep]

The team scoring more than 251 in the first innings in Perth has lost once in the last 34 years.

[M. Patard]

No ball!

[M. Patard]

Was that not a no ball?

[Tony Tea]

The Poms bored Haddin out. I hate dry lines, but they can certainly work against attacking batsmen.

Mind you, the way the Nine commentators are talking, Australia is 2 for 400, not six down for barely 250.

[M. Patard]

The TV is a long way off, but that looked like a no ball to me.

[Tony Tea]

England with some massive gamesmanship slow down. The umpires should give them a hurry up. #Ashes

[Tony Tea]

@Footy Maths, the spam filter gobbled your Watto Lotto comment.

Yes, I've noticed a few knock offs, but what are you going to do? Crack the shits and claim it and you look like a tool. Just got to satisfy yourself with knowing you are #1.

[2BarRiff]

All 6 Aussie wickets have been to crap shots and/or decisions. The Wobblies have returned.

[M. Patard]

For Skin Fold's ton.

[M. Patard]

Ok, I'm giving Skin Folds 15 minutes to hit the cannons.

[M. Patard]

Soft hands.

[m0nty]

Well done youngun.

[M. Patard]

PREEMPTIVE!!!

[M. Patard]

The New South Welshman saves the day, yet again, and all we've got is yawns and silence from the rest.

Fucken' top knock, Smith.

We need more of your cultural homogeneity to take this nation back again.

[M. Patard]

Gun innings to little or no aplomb. No kissing of helmet. A moment's celebration, then back to the job at hand.

[Tony Tea]

100 to Baby Huey Smith: maximum grandiose.

[Tony Tea]

Actually, I agree with that. Smith's celebration was refreshingly muted.

"When you score a touchdown, act like you've done it before."

Can't remember who said that, but it could be NFL coach, Bill Walsh.

[M. Patard]

Cam brought it to us, that quote, for his trenchant criticisms he's good for a quote.

Not sure at all what to make of your song tribute, Tones.

In all seriousness that was a top ton from Smith. All was gone till he came in.

[Tony Tea]

Jeez. Just seen our dismissals. All round Klutzes.

[Tony Tea]

Spilt Milk by Jellyfish is a terrific album.

[Tony Tea]

The shorter Heals: "I wish I could have retired."

[M. Patard]

With ten minutes to go, for anyone who's interested - and, Dan, you're welcome to come along - I'll be at each and every one of these concerts in 2014:

http://www.sydneysymphony.com/production-pages/2014/concert-season/absolutely-beethoven.aspx

7th symphony

STRAVINSKY Symphony in Three Movements
ADAMS Absolute Jest [AP]
BEETHOVEN Symphony No.7

Dates Wed 12 Feb, Fri 14 Feb, Sat 15 Feb Venue Sydney Opera House 8pm

David Robertson's first concert as chief conductor sets the tone with a high-octane program.

Sat 15/02/2013 20:00

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http://www.sydneysymphony.com/production-pages/2014/concert-season/beethovens-fifth.aspx

5th Symphony

VINE Smith's Alchemy for strings
*WIENIAWSKI Violin Concerto No.2
*BEETHOVEN Symphony No.5

Dates Wed 19 Mar, Thu 20 Mar, *Fri 21 Mar Venue Sydney Opera House

6:30, 13:30, 11am

*Tea & Symphony

Fri 11am includes morning tea

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http://www.sydneysymphony.com/production-pages/2014/concert-season/mozart-haydn.aspx

MOZART Symphony No.27, K199
HAYDN Sinfonia concertante, Hob.I:105
MOZART Symphony No.7, K45

Dates Thu 27 Mar, Fri 4 Apr Venues City Recital Hall Angel Place, Sydney Opera House

7pm 11am

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http://www.sydneysymphony.com/production-pages/2014/concert-season/beethoven-1-2.aspx

Piano Concerto 1 & 2

Dates Thu 12 Jun, Fri 13 Jun, Sat 14 Jun Venue Sydney Opera House

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http://www.sydneysymphony.com/production-pages/2014/concert-season/beethoven-3-4.aspx

Beethoven 3 & 4 Piano

Dates Mon 16 Jun, Wed 18 Jun Venue Sydney Opera House

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http://www.sydneysymphony.com/production-pages/2014/concert-season/tchaikovsky-5.aspx

Dates Thu 9 Oct, Fri 10 Oct, Sat 11 Oct Venue Sydney Opera House

STENHAMMAR Excelsior! - Concert Overture
PROKOFIEV Violin Concerto No.2
TCHAIKOVSKY Symphony No.5

**********************************************************************************************

http://www.sydneysymphony.com/production-pages/2014/concert-season/vivaldis-four-seasons.aspx

Vivaldi's Four Seasons

Dates Thu 16 Oct, Fri 17 Oct Venue City Recital Hall Angel Place

VIVALDI The Four Seasons
with music for wind ensemble by MOZART

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[M. Patard]

Well, not ach and everyone, but each of each concert.

[M. Patard]

2014 is the year of Beethoven.

[Tony Tea]

No Wagner?

[M. Patard]

That was 2013.

[David]

Might see you there. Gotta be in Sinee some time next year.

[David]

Decent position at stumps.
Much better than it looked like it would be earlier on.
Good effort from the young bloke.

[M. Patard]

David, make sure you do catch up with me and the mrs. There's also concerts up here in the Mountains but the dates are too close to be given.

What a breathtaking day.

Smith. By Valhalla you must feel good tonight. Save your thirst till the last day.

[M. Patard]

The chant of Stevie BlackSmith.