NON-CREDIBLE FRETS

Tommy "the Brain" Heenan at Back Page Lead:

But he turned up in Brisbane cranky, made a ton and picked a fight with the Pommie No.11. Yes, threatening to break Anderson's arm was a cheap shot but Clarke did lead Australia to victory, and that's all that matters. The Australians may have won ugly but at least they won.

Ugly is in the eye of the beholder. Meanwhile, Hackbeard the pirate at the Sydney Morning Herald:

The Clarke sledging thing? So shoot me, but I don't like it. Sledging that is banter is fine, but threatening bodily violence to an opponent is well over the other side of the line. As they say in the classics, it just isn't cricket …

Does Red Bandana really want someone to shoot him?

Anyone who really believes Clarke really threatened to break Jimmy Anderson's arm is kidding themself, or being intentionally provocative. Click. Bait. For a start, both verballed Clarke, who did not threaten to break Anderson's arm, he merely tried to scare Anderson that Mitchell Johnson would break his arm. Secondly, a real threat is when a grizzled old footballer says to a youngster "get a kick and it will be your last" then follows through on his threat. You know, the kind of thing we all celebrate and laugh at when it is said by Jack Dyer, Teddy Whitten, Mopsy Fraser, Carl Ditteritch and the rest of the justifiably famous hard men of footy. No doubt Union and League have their equals.

The Brain "lectures in sports studies at Monash University's National Centre for Australian Studies" and so probably knows how to kindle an issue. While The Bandana played international rugby and would have copped many an earful from bellicose Kiwis, Saffers and Frogs (some of which he would have approved of, if he thought it was funny).

Comments

[m0nty]

I thought I heard Anderson commenced the physical threats by sending one at Intangibles.

[m0nty]

I'm more scandalised by Bandanna Man using the word "slotted" to refer to Jason Day holing a putt. It's not a slot, it's a hole. If you're going to verb a noun, make sure it's the correct noun to verb.

[Big Ramifications]

Abso farking lutely, Tony. I was almost cheering when I read your post. I'm reading articles / discussions on the Clarke sledge and 95% of them can't even get the fricken back-story correct. I just switch off right there - why the hell would I want to know some moron's opinion on the matter?

Although I do pause and think "is this journalist REALLY that stupid, or is he just trying to whip up some controversy and sell a few more papers?"

I don't mind sledging, as long as it's not moronic. You know, the slips cordon just crapping on, finding 20 different ways to say "ha ha stupid head batsman missed the ball ha ha what a stupid head."

With regards to Clarke's sledge, it wasn't even close to being in the moronic category. It wasn't very polite, but dare I say, in terms of "getting in the batsman's head" it was top shelf. I wonder how much of Pup's fine was due to "oooh, he said the eff word!"?

Same with the Warner press conference CONTROVERSY. What the hell? What did he say wrong? "Scared eyes"? Trott hadn't announced his departure at the time. The only explanation I can think of is:

** People-in-the-know [eg. Warner] were aware of Trott's mental stress issues.
** "Scared eyes" was code for "these problems are starting to re-surface."
** People with mental problems should NEVER EVARR BE REMINDED OF THE FACT.
** Even if it's in code.
** Even if they knowingly put themselves in stressful situations.
** Therefore Dave Warner is a very naughty boy.

Look, I know he's a d!ckhead and he's dumb [eg. drunken Twitter rant] but in this instance what, exactly, was wrong so with what he said? Can someone point me in the right direction, please.

[Big Ramifications]

"so wrong" not "wrong so"

sorry

[Jonathan]

Big Ram, the official description of Clarke's fine makes it 100% about the f word and the "inappropriate gestures". The only thing there is to wonder about is whether the "threat" aspect had anything to do with the decision to charge him.

[Tony Tea]

“I have absolutely no problem about any of what the Australians were doing on the field.”

~~ James Anderson

[Tony Tea]

General agreement?

Roll the clock on some 67 years and there was General agreement Australia captain Michael Clarke had gone too far in threatening England No.11 James Anderson with a “broken arm” towards the end of the recent Ashes opener in Brisbane, which the hosts won by the crushing margin of 381 runs.

[Cameron]

Same article:

'Steve Waugh, when captain of the successful Australia side of the 1990s and early 2000s, made great play of “mental disintegration”.'

Waugh got that line from AB!!!

[Big Ramifications]

Bloody hell. I just double checked David Warner's exact words at the press conference, and did a quick click-around of news stories that followed. Just about every one I read got it wrong.

Here's what Warner said:

** England look like they have scared eyes.
** The way that Trott got out was pretty poor and pretty weak.
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Kim Hughes: http://www.heraldsun.com.au/sport/cricket/former-australia-captain-kim-hughes-launches-scathing-attack-on-david-warner/story-fni2usfi-1226768951939

** Warner said Trott was weak.

No he did not. He said THE WAY HE GOT OUT was weak. Massive difference. How many times have you heard a batsman's dismissal being described as "weak" or "soft"? Like, a million times? How often have you jumped to the conclusion: "OMG! That batsman must be a soft human being. And shame on the person who said it"?

** It is one of the worst things I've EVER heard in my WHOLE life.

Jesus wept.

** It's OK to sledge someone and accuse them of being a poofter, as long as it stays on the field. Saying stuff at press conferences is a no go.

They didn't have the media saturation and daily freaken press conferences back in your day, Kim. What do you want players to say? Sit there and do the "we'll take it one game at a time" "we gave it a red hot go" shtik?

I'm not even gonna grace his poofter comment with a response.
--------------------
Steve Waugh: http://www.aninews.in/newsdetail6/story142993/waugh-twins-slam-warner-for-039-weak-scared-039-comments-about-039-stressed-039-trott.html

** England didn't have scared eyes, but Warner probably smelt fear in England.

What the.. I don't even..

And in the same article his brother Mark [who, as a player, was on the payroll of an Indian bookmaker] lectures Warner on his morals.
--------------------
Nasser Hussain: http://www.smh.com.au/sport/cricket/david-warner-a-bit-silly-for-trott-comments-says-shane-warne-20131125-2y54n.html

** Warner suggested Trott was scared.

No, dickhead. He said ENGLAND were scared.
--------------------
The BBC: http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/cricket/25065458

** Warner described Jonathan Trott as poor and weak.

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong! He said THE WAY HE GOT OUT was poor and weak. Massive difference.

The Australian: http://www.theaustralian.com.au/news/english-cricket-team-revealed-as-closet-justin-bieber-fans-on-their-way-to-visit-australia-zoo-on-queenslands-sunshine-coast/story-e6frg6n6-1226768246436

** Warner said Trot was weak.

Right. That tears it!
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Check this for a laugh. Do a Google search for something like: "Warner" and "he had scared eyes" [remember, Warner NEVER SAID THAT]. Check out how many hits get returned. https://www.google.com.au/#q=%22he+had+scared+eyes%22+warner+ Hits from mainstream media outlets. The world has gone farking mad.

[Tony Tea]

QED:

claiming he had "scared eyes"

You can do pretty much whatever you like, as long as you put scary quotes around the tastiest words.

[Tony Tea]

Interesting.

[Rex Munday]

Bit rich coming from a renowned thug on the rugby union field