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Russ

Will they play Bird? They seem very wedded to Starc, Siddle and Pattinson.

The really really dumb thing would be to play five bowlers, because our batting is worse than useless. There is a genuine case for saying that unless Lord's is going to be fast (and something tells me we won't see fast this summer) the attack should actually be Siddle (or Harris), Bird and Faulkner.

I'm not sure there is much difference between Agar and Lyon, so the latter's batting is worth keeping him for. Actually he looked a good prospect; just needs to get up on his toe more, use his height, propel the ball upwards, instead of through. He had a tendency to just put the ball on the pitch, which is okay if he is bowling dry, but we'll need more at some point.

Batting? I'm still annoyed they didn't bring Cosgrove, because he is the perfect fit with Warner's implosion and Cowan's form. Best option (only option? Wade?) is to bring Khawaja in. Or hope Cowan can salvage something. But he looked bad, worse than normal, and that was already bad. Australia won in 97 with risible batting, but they had maybe the best bowling lineup they've ever had, and it was still 3-2. That 3-1 prediction is looking solid.

Tony Tea

I would love to see Bird in the side. Starc was sloppy in Notts. Pity he cannot be counted upon to bowl deadly in-swingers most every ball, then dip the odd one away.

gillysgone

Is this the test to take a risk? Drop Cowan, move them all up one, insert Faulkner at 6. Probably get similar runs to Trent Bridge, but bowling is stronger. Usman for Cowan is the safe move. will Harris or Bird get more sickets than Starc? Possibly. I guess dropping a batsman for an all rounder weakens he batting, and the Poms would love that. 2 fresh bowlers - Harris plus Faulkner, leaving Strc out, would leave the attack very fresh, as opposed to the Poms who are all backing up, assuming Finn remains.
Well coach and selector, time to earn your money.

gillysgone

wickets not sickets

Tony Tea

Out: Cowan, Starc. In: Khawaja, Harris.

RT

Makes sense. Would love to see Harris swinging it at pace.

flutey

On our side, I reckon Bresnan in for Finn. Highlights of the first test, Clarke coming out with the usual media trained "we can take a lot of positives out of our performance" rubbish, and England winning on a DRS after Haddin refused to walk - not much mention of that in the press after Broad's er slight nick to slip. England were good with flashes of crap, Australia were crap with flashes of good. There's a big difference. 5-0, feel my 90s pain.

Hangover Black

Taufel for Dar would be nice.

Tony Tea

Fingers crossed Dar over-corrects. Otherwise bring in the two umpires who have given Australia the best pro-howler record.

Cameron

Have to say i agree(d) with those selections:

He (Lehamann) got Khawaja to Qld mont so you'd have to guess he's a fan.

I'd say he'll replace Cowan at 3. Harris for Starc also.

Posted by: Cameron I Sunday, July 14, 2013 at 09:43 PM

Carrot

Surprised they didn't bring in Warner. I thought the story about sending him to Zimbabwe might have been a bit of mis-direction - same as them managing to convince everyone that Faulkner would get a run in the 1st Test, instead they picked Agar. I feel better about Khawaja at 3, but wonder whether it'll make any real difference.

Carrot

PS - 11:15 start? Why?

Russ

Her Maj is in da house. Apparently that means they need to move the start.

Russ

Bowling again. Our batting is so flaky it probably makes no difference. But I'm not complaining if the Lord's pitch is as flat as it normally is.

Tony Tea

Lucky to have the onus taken out if our hands. Mind you, Clarke would call "tails" with a double headed coin.

Tony Tea

Get it on the spot, knuckleheads.

Tony Tea

Review that?!?!?!?

Tony Tea

Hit the pad first.

Tony Tea

No Dar, no England.

Tony Tea

I love the big Spearmint.

Tony Tea

Where the bloody hell are ya?

m0nty

Boycs is talking about crossdressers. Carry on.

Tony Tea

And Warnie has discovered precise diction.

Russ

Good start to the session in the wickets column, good end in the runs. There isn't a hell of a lot in this pitch by the looks. Mind you, it doesn't need much to get our lot out.

Soups

Trott out. I'd say he was lazy in thought AND in execution of shot. He almost middled it to a waiting Ussie. A needed wicket. Let's build the pressure.

m0nty

If Pup doesn't score a ton on this deck we're stuffed.

food terroirist

I feel nauseous saying this... Pugsley with the massive breakthrough!

He softened up Bell with a juicy full toss the previous ball, then bowled a proper leg break. Just as the game was tilting towards England's favour.

Siddle's no ball, was again another decision that was so close to going our way.

But our bowlers over stepped in the first test too many times, they should err on the side of caution.

food terroirist

Back to his normal style of dismissals.

Pugsley gets the Ginger Ninja caught & bowled off a full toss.

game on!

p.s. if smith gets a five-for in the 1st innings, I promise to do a nudie run down the main street.

food terroirist

scary thought: if smith is getting this much grip on the 1st day, what will Swann do?

Nick

Lucky to get Cook and KP out cheaply. Absolute brain fade from Trott. Pattinson was shit - must improve tomorrow. Harris excellent. Smith - should have bowled earlier. Great day. Fucking hot!

Nick

No Balls.

It really irritates me that they only check for these using the replay when a wicket is 'taken'. Why not check every ball? Automate it. Free the on field umpire to look where the action is. I suspect the onfield umpires don't even look at the front foot anymore, and rely on the replay in the case of a wicket. This deskills the umpire and the bowler, who gets no meaningful feedback on when they're close to the line. It's also unedifying for the crowd when the dismissed player lingers half way between the wicket and the pavilion awaiting the call. Paint the line, put a laser across it, connect it to a light, and get on with play.

lou

Siddle's done that too many times now. You'd think he'd have sorted it out, he's hardly a novice.

lou

And thank fVck about Rhino. I hope he can play 2 tests in a row.

Rex Munday

Totally agree Nick. Was just saying the same thing to a Pommy mate over a pint

The Don has risen

I'm baack and how in the hell do you lot get this publicity?

I look up to see the best of the week and here you are?

I am surprise just how loose Cook is in batting. I'm figuring if you get him out we are a chance against England.

Russ

FT, Swann isn't that good. He has a good record in places that support spinners (Sri Lanka, UAE), he has had good and bad tours of places where spinners can do well or terribly (England, India, West Indies) and he has been rubbish where no spinner does well (Australia). Which doesn't make him any better than Lyon (who knows about Agar), and Smith ought to be able to make himself a useful bowler in reasonable conditions (or against Bell). Our batsmen might collapse to him, but that is their failure rather than something about Swann.

That's a reasonable day from the bowlers. The pitch was slow (again) but Harris used the new ball well (oh for Bird at the other end, we don't need Siddle and Patto with Spearmint there). If we can avoid being 5/40 with the bat a reasonable score might be possible.

Tony Tea

Went to bed early last night, so feel free to correct me if I'm wrong. Anderson came in as a nightwatchman for Broad, right? RIGHT?!?

Tony Tea

Bell: FTB?

Tony Tea

How many D'oh! balls have Australia bowled since the start of the 2005 Ashes?

lou

Smith gets more revs than Swann so it means that Swann... well, I don't know what the fVck it really means.

I liked the chagrin in Hussain's voice though when he was talking about it. After all the pontificating about it during the first test.

The Don has risen

wow,pontingfications!!

The ball is swinging so it will be interesting to see Anderson and Bresan tonight.

Cook's loose technique makes this a much closer series.

I just love it when Root is out for six

Nick

Anderson came in as night watchman for broad. He was roundly booed until the crowd realized it wasn't Broad.

The Don has risen

that is a broad statement!

Tony Tea

Big of Thump to vale out Haddin after Klutzy failed to go for the previous nick.

Carrot

Here I am talking about DRS again, but why would you review that? These are the sorts of reviews I have trouble with. It's all very well nicking it, being given not out and staying there, but nicking it, being given out and then reviewing it when you know you've nicked it is bullshit. I don't expect a player to walk, but I do expect a play to get on his bike when he's been given and he knows he's out. Chancing your arm reviews are not on, in my opinion.

Carrot

Hello - an ECB fielding coach in as a sub? Where's Ricky Ponting when you need him? Didn't someone point out that bringing in specialist, shit-hot fielders as substitutes is ALSO not really on?

Shep

Bloody Watson. He has no idea where his front leg is. That was as plumb as it gets

Tony Tea

Fark off, Watson.

Carrot

You'd have thought that he would be aware that he's an lbw candidate, wouldn't you? And that going across his stumps like that might get him out? And when he gets hit on the pads in those situations that he's going to get out quite a lot? So why would you review it, you prat?

m0nty

Boof should set him some homework.

I WILL NOT WASTE MY REVIEW ON A PLUMB LBW
I WILL NOT WASTE MY REVIEW ON A PLUMB LBW
I WILL NOT WASTE MY REVIEW ON A PLUMB LBW
* 100

lou

Watson never believes he's out, despite his horrendous record with LBs. He's such a self-obsessed man it's scary.

The Mongrel

And Mickeyleaks reckons Pup doesn't like Paper Cut.

I wonder why.

Give him a clip over the ear for me, Pup.

Self -obsessed poser with ADHD.

Tony Tea

Trouble is Clarke likes to pinch reviews too.

m0nty

What the flying fvck was that. Waist high full toss LBW. Isn't that a no ball?

Oh, it wasn't out anyway. Not even close. Should have reviewed.

The Mongrel

It's not just the waste of a review. Pup does that too.

It's losing your wicket on the stroke of lunch. Oh wait, that's known as Clarke Time for a reason.

Alright, it's for getting out LBW - again - and getting a start and failing to go on with it - again.

m0nty

I blame Paper Cut for that one, if Buck had two reviews he might have used it.

Hangover Black

Watson's wicket.

m0nty

Trott just dropped the... um... innings victory. They'll still win but.

m0nty

If only we actually had a National Batting Group Unit Army that stuck around for a while in a pinch, this England side is not all that good. But we'll make them look like #1.

m0nty

And again we get dudded on DRS. I didn't think that was out. Where was the hotspot? No sound either?

m0nty

Ah, Snicko says it was out.

Bloody awful shot. Hughes fails again.

Carrot

What the hell?? No matter WHAT we do with DRS we lose wickets.

What evidence was there that that was out? Crazy. I think I'm beginning to see the Injuns' point!

lou

It's got to b/w 20s slapstick funny now.

m0nty

Paper Cut is the new Fatty Arbuckle.

m0nty

Shambles. Ussie skies to mid off of all places.

m0nty

It's only disappointing if you had any hope in the first place.

lou

Twatto Arbuckle. I like it. WTF? Ussie shat himself about facing Swann. God, it's like watching a bad U19 team.

David

Thank christ I'm in barbarian France where cricket is ignored. I can't watch what sounds to be a complete joke.
Maybe both Clarke and Watson should be dropped. After all neither of them are doing anything at the moment.
Mind you on that basis the entire batting group should be sent home.
Actually I don't see how that could make things worse.

Carrot

So we're down to Clarke versus England. We always knew it would come to this at some point!

lou

Trigger happy umps now.

Rex Munday

Watson and Hughes are shockingly selfish

Nick

Awful. Every fucking Pom wicket we are treated to a review of whether it was a no ball or not. Maybe Broad bowled a no ball to Clarke, maybe not. We wouldn't know. They didn't show Rogers' dismissal at the ground either. Watson was sitting on the dressing room, alone, with the door shut. After it was pointed out on the radio, they opened the doors.

Shit cricket by Australia. A corpse rots from the head and two self obsessed guys in the leadership group doesn't work.

As I type, the Poms have declined to review an lbw. Solid.

The Mongrel

From Cricinfo:

It's fair to say that Australia's next rung of batsmen aren't exactly knocking the door down at the moment. Australia A are currently 151-8 against Zimbabwe. David Warner made 11 to add to his first-innings 6.

Tony Tea

Farce.

Tony Tea

Go for the fvcken ball, Haddin.

Tony Tea

Sadly, England is going to grind out this second innings and drag the match out to five days.

Russ

Thank god I was out and missed that. Glad to see the new coach is having the desired effect. Post 100 scores was what Boof called for, and that is what he has got.

Tony Tea

I went to bed at lunch with Australia one down and woke up a few hours later with England batting. The predictions pre-series about our batting were spot on. Not that there was any doubt.

Tony Tea

All that remains of this series is to see whether Australia can post an innings which will not make The List.

Vindicate

Bam, Trotty gone. Review THAT ya carnt!

Remain in Faith

Common Sizzler!

Cook has given us some hope by not enforcing the follow on. All depends on what they get of course, but, if we can roll them we are still in with a hope. If he sent us back out we'dve been five down by now and gone completely.

Remain in Faith

Not common Sizzler but Come on! Sizzler.

Though it is very common of Sizzler.

Tony Tea

I would prefer Cook sent us back in.

Remain in Faith

Your hatred of Australia knows no bounds.

Rex Munday

Surely scores of 6 & 11 will put Warner in the boxseat for an immediate recall

Tony Tea

What a dreadful innings by KP.

Remain in Faith

Tony, you have to look deep within yourself, in one of those dead quiet, silent moments in the dark of the morning, and find that spark of love still burning bright.

Sizzler has.

3 fa!

Tony Tea

Rex, are there ANY Australian batsmen - batsman singular - who might warrant a call up?

Tony Tea

We are filth.

Tony Tea

At least we can bowl out-swingers.

Tony Tea

At this rate, by the time we bat the ball will be grubbing.

Remain in Faith

One victory for Oz is that the Poms have learned from us and sent in their lower order to bat for time and runs.

Remain in Faith

Phew, saved from an innings defeat. Thanks Mr. Cook. Very gentlemanly of you.

food terroirist

Sizzle chest with 3 early wickets to rein the poms in. Makes it easier to digest the horrible batting by us.

what the fuck was Watson thinking when he reviewed the lbw? He is a liability at the top order, not only getting out at Clarke time, piss poor rotation of the strike and his self-entitlement means he always thinks he isn't out and instantly reviews.

Klutzy ran out agar, it was Agars call, Haddin just stood at the crease.

Harris has bowled well all match, I've missed the gap-toothed hulk. He gets his line & lenght right from the start of his spell.
Pattinson's done exactly the opposite, hasnt been able to land the ball consistently & struggled to control his swing with new ball.

Would like to see bird in for Pattinson in the 3rd test at Old Trafford.
Sizzler might need a rest, but I'ld like to see Harris, Siddle, Bird & Lyon. Play Agar or Smith as the allrounder. I still like Lyon.

The edge off Watsons bowling between Haddin & Clarke - hilarious

food terroirist

poor Rogers. Bizzaro way to get out

He would've reviewed that if Watson hadnt burned one already

food terroirist

This has to be the best summary of tWatto I have read.

http://www.espncricinfo.com/the-ashes-2013/content/story/653135.html

"But Shane Watson is a Test opener with an average of 35. He regularly gets out in the same way. He has tried to retire from bowling a few times. He was suspended while vice-captain. He has issues with his captain. He bowled in the IPL after stating he wouldn't bowl in Tests. And he uses reviews in a way that does not help his side.
It's hard to be on his side.
Shane Watson may have the natural skills and confidence to win Australia Test matches, but he has the behaviour and results of a man who virtually never has."

Carrot

We have a lot to thank Siddle for. I bet Clarke could just about turn for him about now - I'm sure his wickets made this evening's press conference that little bit easier! This was looking like a shambles of Melbourne 2010 proportions, but we might JUST still be in the game if we take wickets tomorrow.

If someone can score a run or two, we should be able to get something from this series. England's top-order has actually been worse than ours, or at least their opening pair has been, but their middle order is actually scoring runs. We've just got to pray that at some point (tomorrow?) their middle order falls in a heap as well and we can take advanatage. I think it's been said before here - they're not actually very good, but the problem is that we're worse. Cook's form has been a surprise, KP's to be expected I guess, I wonder if Trott might be playing himself out of it. Let's hope so.

Also - for the part-timer that he is (was?) Smith seems to be landing them pretty well! He's been quite impressive so far.

Dan

If you had 11 (or even another three or four) players with the character, skill and application of Siddle and Harris you'd be walking this series. Good blokes, very good players.

This is actually a pretty average England side - certainly, Bell and Anderson apart, these are average-to-very-average performances - but without weather or injury I actually can't see Australia winning a Test.

I hope we're not some way into a West Indies style fall? I genuinely want Australia to be a strong team (I'd like the Windies to be strong too) but at the moment they look chaotic.

I can't work out whether Watson is thick or selfish, or thick and selfish, but I wouldn't have him in your side, under the old 'no c*nts' rule.

Rogers - he should have referred that. The fact that he didn't is telling of the madness behind the scenes.

Khawaja doesn't look a Test player, to me. Ditto Hughes and Smith (at the moment).

Pattinson has all the Lillee posturing but can't back it up with the ball. I thought Starc was better.

Agar is OK and seems a great young lad, but he's obviously a long way off.

Haddin - I know a lot of you don't like him but I think he's a cracking cricketer. He's not the best keeper I've seen, he's not even in the top 20, but at least he fights.

Clarke - I actually feel sorry for him. His brain looks scrambled, and it's only halfway through the second Test.

If Warner is the answer to any of this I will be amazed.

Why are they not playing Bird?

And bearing in mind Smith can actually bowl, why are they not saying to him, you practise bowling like a f*cking demon practicer, because you are going to bat at eight, and be our frontline leggie for the next decade? If he put his mind to it I think he could do that. He is never going to be a Test no6 though.

lou

I reckon Cook and Flower were given the hard word by ECB execs about not enforcing the follow on. No reason for them not to do it otherwise.

The ECB don't want to refund 2 days worth of money.

lou

The List is getting a bloody thrashing 2013 and I thought 2012 was pretty fvcken bad.

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