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The WA Cricket Playing Group needed a coach who could stand up to the players, come down hard on them and bring them into line, RSM style. Gnome B.N. is possibly the worst candidate they could have chosen in this regard.


Picture the first training session.

Gnome: "Brilliant, Northy. Sensational, Marshy. Exceptional, Davo. Magnificent, Vogesy."

Hangover Black

You guys just don't like him, do you? I've met JL. He seems a decent bloke. After slumping to 7/52 in their second dig, it won't take much to see some improvement in the WA batting group.

Tony Tea

WA slumped to 7/52 to celebrate JL's arrival.


No one likes a suckhole.


I know a guy who played first-grade in the WACA competition in Perth for many years. He knew and played against most of the who's-who of Western Australian cricket, and said that Langer was a nice guy generally but had a shocking case of white-line fever. He also tells a funny story that he was playing in a match at one point when Langer got knocked out cold by a bouncer (yes, it happened in grade cricket too), and when he awoke they asked him what his name was and he said "Damien Martyn". After all these years of him worshipping Steve Waugh he wanted to be Martyn all along...


I love that, Carrot. It's probably bullshit but so beautiful if true.

Langer now has to bang on about how much 'talent' there is in the WA squad. Every coach they've had has said that. It's obligatory.

Voges, North and Davis are all averaging under 20 for the first class season so far. And none of their bowlers are averaging under 30. The Warriors are so fvcked it's not funny. And the only way Langer can take them is sideways, I really doubt that it is up.

Tony Tea

The WA team is picked based on who wins the skolling comps.


He says he was on the field at the time, and he swears it's true - but then again, every tall story involves a guy swearing it's true, so - yeah. You could imagine it happening, though.

Kudos on the spelling, Tone.

Hangover Black

I thought the "I'm Damien Martyn" story came from his first Test in Adelaide when Ian Bishop and Curtly took turns putting cherries on his helmet.

Tony Tea

Could have come from any of the countless times Gnome was sconned.


I read an interview with Langer and he really is saying the right things... and I don't mean about how talented they are. He said something about Shaun Marsh and his off-field stuff and how he can go and play for someone else if he isn't prepared to make the right decisions.

First time I've heard a WA coach say something like that about one of the Marsh boys. Thumbs up to the BNG.

Though how he's going to keep Mitch on the straight and narrow when he's cooling his heels with an injury is another thing.


Hi, I just wanted to tell you, you're dead wrong. Your article doesn't make any sense.


I like your comment, so I will leave it - without the links.

Joan Neilsen

Very interesting article. i like it.
Thanks & Regards
Free Live Cricket Stream in HD

Professor Rosseforp

This tall story could make a fabulous B grade Australian movie -- imagine if Damien Martyn was knocked out at the same time, and he woke up as Justin Langer, and the guy who looked like Justin Langer was really Damien Martyn.
Of course the only way to return them to their own bodies would be a simultaneous knock on the scone again.
Come to think of it, it would be a fairly crap movie, but would make a nice change from another telemovie about World Series Cricket, or the Bodyline series.


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