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Bare? Bottom? Guess who?

Hangover Black

From Spanky " Mark Taylor can serve as chairman assisted by thoughtful cricketing people such as Skander Malcolm (CEO of General Electric Australia), Steve Waugh, Eddie McGuire, John O'Neill, Waleed Aly, Patrick Gallagher (CEO of Allen and Unwin), Steve Bernard and Ian Chappell. No conflicts of interest allowed."

Is he pulling the piss? Seriously?

Waleed Aly?
CEO of government protected publishing house?


Good to see Arbib dragged himself out of one of those cocktail parties at the US Embassy to opine on the cricket.


I reckon it's Will Brodie who once again put together the best balanced assessment with his "Australian Test team needs bitter medicine" article.

Patard with a vengeance

Just read that list. Waleed Aly? How did he get in the mix?


When someone says something like "Andrew Strauss's side have the makings for their dynasty" as Derek Pringle wrote, you know it won't happen. Did Australia think they were embarking on a dynasty after beating the Windies in 1995? No. A significant set of circumstances aligned to enable Australia to gun it for 10 years: Warne, McGrath, Gilchrist, Steve Waugh, poor international bowling, good pitches, a head-start in technical methods and professionalism, to name the obvious. Dynasties are something you look back on, not something you predict. If you think you are set for one, you probably aren't.


If England think Australia, South Africa and India won't study and attempt to emulate all the good things they have just done they are kidding themselves.

Patard with a vengeance

Another thing about the Oz "dynasty" is forgotten factors:


The first 4 were class in their own right. The last 3 much better than anything we've got going around now.

In the batting stakes look at those like Stuart Law and Lehman who remained on the periphery for so long yet would waltz into this team today.

Does England have that depth of quality? Lets face it, take away their 3 Saffas and they're not so flash in the batting department.

Their bowling attack has been impressive mostly for their consistency and discipline which doesn't take anything away from them but points to a well coached and drilled team.

The Poms were a unit on this tour. I don't want to get all hackneyed but they really were on a mission whereas Oz strikes me as a divided team of big heads and solid gutsy types. All past great Oz teams have been exactly that - teams. I just don't get a sense of united effort from our team, as much as they talk about it. It seems the more they do talk about the squad, the group etc the more one gets the sense they are exactly the opposite.

A sign of the times.


I read on cricinfo that the stand-in skipper told everyone before the last innings to 'play their natural game'.

Ha! There's a surprise. Are there any players out there in Aus whose natural game is actually suited to batting out time? The English team has a few, don't see any in our lot.


'play their natural game' is code for 'have a tonk' and an absurd way to tell a player how to bat for two days.


The buck passing is something else.

I'm finding that far more embarrassing than any of the losses. God, no wonder the team is in a state and can't take responsibility for anything it does. Look at the behaviour of the individuals in the structure around it.


Stakeholders 1:

"I'm not discounting the fact we couldn't look at the way in which we prepared, but I think to point the finger to preparation is rubbish."

Stakeholders 2:

"Circumstances sometimes don't allow you for the ideal preparation - there's no perfect world situation with these sorts of preparations."

We can always blame the medical staff:

Wrong diagnosis ruins paceman's season

CRICKET Australia bungled a diagnosis on Josh Hazlewood's injured back and now one of the country's most promising young fast bowlers has been ruled out for the rest of the summer.

Nice to know our cricketers are in good hands.



So if this article is even half-accurate, Tim Nielsen was talking about discipline and suiting the play to the situation and Clarke is doing the opposite.

If this is what the youngsters are being told by their seniors in the team, we are in for a very long haul. I'm starting to really loathe the line 'play your natural game'.

The Mongrel

Perspective alert.

One of the features of being a mongrel dog is my father is English.

Unlike the imbecile Giles Coren, the old man is a good loser and a good winner.

He is as delighted as I was in 1989.

It's my birthday today. The kids sang me their version of Happy bithday to Me. http://www.justineclarke.com.au/music/3/track/36

I've just smoked a superb cuban cigar on the most beautiful evening.

I don't need to say God Bless Australia as we are already blessed.

Australia and Carlton- out time will come again. And when it does, the bad times will make the good times doubly sweet.

The Mongrel

Erratum: for "out" read "our".

And here's hoping it doesn't take 20+ years for the Aussies to reign again.


The Poms are already talking up dynasties, which means they are setting themselves up for premature disappointment.


Stuart Broad started that stuff last year after the Ashes, about how they plan to be the 'legacy' generation.

Fair enough, I'm sure everyone would like that, but as you say, no-one actually can plan that.


Stuart Broad & the Man-U of cricket.

Professor Rosseforp

Mongrel, I am in a quandary. I usually support the English cricket team and have never been a fan of the Australian approach to the game. However, I'm beginning to realise that I must just identify heavily with losing teams, as I have no sense of elation over the English victory in the Ashes. It's just plain wrong. On the other hand, I have little sympathy for the Australian team. Nielsen, Clarke, Ponting and Hilditch think they have done a great job. I think I'm a better guitarist than Django Reinhardt, but that only shows that -- like the Aussie coaches/selectors/team -- I'm delusional, in denial and perhaps stupid to boot.
I'm disappointed in the Australian team because of the manner of their losses. They have been almost inevitable, and the people in charge haven't acknowledged the errors that are plainly visible to the armchair pundit. Traditionally, the Aussies have been good at judging when to bring down the axe, but they have failed in this series. I think it's the manner of losing that has disturbed the fans.
Maybe Australian cricket has reached the stage that English soccer did after the last world cup. For years the English have stuck by the belief that their Premier League is the best competition in the world, but it's beginning to sink in that this may not be a sustainable belief 44 years after their last World Cup win.


Tony, it was obvious from about '93 that Australia was about to embark on a dynasty (though you can't know whether it will be great or merely very good). It was obvious from the depth of young players queuing up to get in the side. Remember, 94-95 was the year Australia-A beat England too in the ODIs. Noone could have known that McGrath would turn out to be a great then, but there was certainly the sense that the side to come was potentially better than the side we had.

England don't currently have any great players (particularly bowlers) to speak of, which will count against them smashing all-comers. But if the judgment of people who watch county cricket is any good then England may well be set for a long period of being somewhere between very good and great.

Many of the articles above are just bringing up old bug-bears, and blaming the loss on them. T20, in particular, can't be blamed for the failure of players who don't play it and the success of players who do, especially given it has existed in England for a lot longer than it has here. The simplest explanation that Australian cricket was incompetent at every level, and consistently managed to delude themselves into thinking nothing was wrong when things clearly were. If people aren't doing their job it doesn't matter what structure you have.


God there is some rubbish history bandied about. From Warne's telegraph column:

"I do not know how you enter an Ashes series which has been two years in the making without knowing what your best team is."

The 1993 Ashes side (in particular the opening partnership) was worked out in the last few days before the first test. The original 1997 Ashes squad didn't include Reiffel, who was later instrumental in the win; had a captain facing the axe, and shifted Bevan out half way through the series. The 2001 tour saw a reshuffle of the top three in the middle of a winning campaign. In 2005 and 2009 no changes were made to a flailing batting line-up during the series: both were lost.

"Look at people they brought in. Usman Khawaja, Xavier Doherty, Michael Beer, Steve Smith and Phillip Hughes. It was 1-1 only two Test ago so why have we had all this change?"

What change? Three of those came in because of injuries. North and Hauritz hadn't been performing, and were dropped - North after the series became 0-1, Hauritz after we lost 2-0 in India. The real question is why it took so long to make even those minimal changes?

Professor Rosseforp

I agree with Russ that T20 can't accept all the blame -- at least not without dragging in the 50 over game, too. Watson's regular 40s and the occasional wicket are ideal for the 50 over game, but haven't translated into the test format -- although Watson is one of the few Aussie players who can say he was worth his spot in the side.


Russ, Warnie is a thought bubble pundit who throws enough ideas into the air for the occasional one to make sense. Then, because he is Warnie, the noise of hat tossing celebrations which accompany his few pearlers drown out his many knuckle-headed howlers.

In more general terms - as I veer wildly into the deep woods of broad brush, stereotypes & generalisations - it is just possible Warnie, who has never had time for scholastic grooming, might just lack the intellectual rigour to nut out the kind of analysis you just outlined.

The Don has Risen

fist things first.

We got beqaten thre times by an innings.

Even Roberts, holding and Garner couldn't do that.

We are in a crisis.

Moreover talent goes in cycles. We are either going down ro have reached rock bottom.

We must rebuild.

In the game I umpired yesterday the new batsmn came in and defended the first ball. The fieldsman threw the ball to the keeper except the keeper wasn't there.

Easy way to get off the mark.

this is good


Back at the dynasty business. I don't doubt Australia thought they were going to have a strong team circa 1993, but I also think that the ensuing 12 to 14 years of dominance were enabled by a serendipitous set of circumstances. The West Indies falling in a hole. (Which was predicted. Tubby: "Once we beat them, everyone will.") Warne & McGrath. England remaining rubbish. South Africa relentlessly choking. A world wide dearth of strong attacks. It was not until 2005 that we faced a strong attack, although the Windies with Curt & Court in 1999 were a hint good pace could trouble us. CEO pitches, which enabled our batting to hit through the line with relative impunity. (Getting all Warnie: the dry summers, which allowed those roads to proliferate, and lessen swing.)

If England can guarantee all those advantages will fall into their lap then they might embark on several years as a powerhouse. In their favour, Australia have just fallen in a hole, India will soon lose TLM & Wee Wee and South Africa will soon lose Fat Jacks Kallis.

But it remains to be seen how long any Test side will maintain a position at the top of the wazza.

The mid 90s to the mid 00s was the time of incumbency in politics, due, in no small part, to favourable economic conditions. The future looks less propitious for long term government. I would suggest the same applies to cricket.

Patard with a vengeance

Not sure if this has been linked (it's hard to keep up) but it has to be a first: The One Test Diary by our greatest ever debutant.


Michael Clarke was great. He constantly reminded me to enjoy the experience. ''Pup'' said no matter what happened I should just go out there and have a blast. He said if I batted as I had in the Sheffield Shield, everything would take care of itself. He was insistent that I had fun - and I did.

Yayyyyy, FUN!! Go FUN!!!! FUN, FUN, FUN!!! I'm having FUN, Fun, fun, FuN, Funnny Fun Fucking Funn fun fun.


Tony, Tuesday, January 04:

This series has all the hallmarks of 1989, when Australia rolled England via a series of thumpings. Fingers crossed, very tightly, that it will not presage 15 years of English domination and Australian patheticness.

Tim, Sunday, January 09:

IT WAS a glorious Ashes triumph, the more so for being achieved on foreign turf. Through the course of the series the winner rose from underdog to killer. The anguish and frustration of an unfamiliar period of subjugation were, at last, expunged. A left-handed opening batsman, recently uncertain of his place in the team, produced the second-highest series aggregate by an individual in his nation's proud history. There were two epic innings totals exceeding 600 amid a veritable run-scoring orgy.

By the end, the home team had rolled over, whipped and humiliated. Its selection panel looked more ridiculous and less logical with every new attempt at a winning formula. The old enemy had been trodden on at last.

Sound familiar? Of course: it happened in England in 1989. An Australian team, restless for success, written off when it arrived, took all before it. Its lowest first innings total in six Tests was 424. Mark Taylor accumulated a Bradmanesque 839 runs; in the fifth Test he and Geoff Marsh batted through the opening day. By then a shellshocked England could offer only feeble resistance. And the near 20-year epoch of carnage that followed is etched into cricket history.

Patard with fun and a vengeance

My antiquated idea of fun: getting a ton, a five for and winning a test. But then, wtf would I know.

Brian W.

"And we'll have fun fun fun
til Pommy takes the Ashes away"

Patard with fun and a vengeance

Spongepup Lemming Pants sings his version of the team song before ducking out for a low carb cold one, leaving the adults to commiserate.

Patard with fun and a vengeance

The crowd was great. I was pumped to receive such a great reception and the roar when I scored my first run was amazing - it felt as though I'd scored a century.

Felt as though...felt? No son, no. You did score a century. Yes you did. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Those peoples r jars haters!

Smithy and I spent a bit of time together in the lead-up to the Test and during the game by watching movies and television in our room and ordering room service. It was good to have him around.

Awwwww, isn't that nice. Sounds like a lot of fun.

It was great to have Bobby Barter as our room attendant. He's an important figure at my grade club, Randwick-Petersham, and he can't do enough for you. He's full of energy and it was special to have him around for the Test because it added more to that comfort factor.

Pepsi for the debutant? Pillow? Blow dry and foot rub? How about a manicure?

Phil Hughes was out and I was to go in. [what a surprise that must have been]I don't often eat much when I'm batting or about to bat, and I skipped lunch because I.... hard as nails. What are your legs? Steel springs! What are they gonna do? Get me run out by Wato if I'm not farst enough.

I just kept repeating to myself, ''Watch it … watch … watch … watch as hard as you can.'' Right! Stop right farkin there. I can see errors creeping into your game already. What were you farken well told you incandescent debutant cunt?! FUN you idiot. Now say it a hundred times and that's what you'll get. 100 x Fun! And that's enough for any man (which you're not btw, just any man that is)

It was disappointing [to be caught by Jonathan Trott off Graeme Swann], especially on the last ball on the first day. I still felt disappointed when I woke up the next morning but I learned a lot from that dismissal. One of the most valuable things in cricket is experience. And fun. Don't forget fun. The experience of fun

I honestly feel the same as I did before Monday and I am happy about that. It's good to be level-headed and down to earth - it lets you keep moving forward. Yes, you're a role model son. And that's the greatest thing a role model can be. To be one. Without having done a thing to deserve it.


And back on Warnie & his article. Any chance his ghosty might point him in the right direction? Assuming he has one, which I am assuming.

Patard with fun and a vengeance

By Brian W: Pup's Song.

I wanna cryiayayayaiiiiiiIIIIIIIIIiiiiiiiiIIIIIIIII I


I think Australia finally hitting the bottom now (even when they should have started to rebuild two/three series' ago) is akin to the Dees in the AFL bottoming out when they did. Australia will hopefully be ahead of SA and India when they lose all their aging players. Whilst there aren't any drafts or such things to take into account, hopefully the curve back up will be at least similar to these other teams so we can have *some* good times coming up in the next few years.

Depends how this review goes I guess.


England have a draft - South Africa.


One wonders how much a process driven organisation like CA is amenable to wholesale change. I don't for a moment imagine they will swing the axe, so it will be interesting to see what, if any, change occurs. They have sat on the current system for more than ten years, so they must be reasonably happy with the direction. And major overhaul would be seen as an admission that the current structure has been a failure.


I read Warney's article, then wondered why I bothered.

He doesn't engage his brain too much, does he? It's the usual attention seeking crap.


The better AFL analogy is Essendon, with Nielsen in the Matthew Knights role.

Hangover Black

I'm in furious agreement with you, Mont.

Russ, Australian cricket is now at the position that Essendon was when Knights was first appointed - ie promising the board that the list was good enough, and they wouldn't have to bottom out to become a contender again. Richmond with Wallace at the helm is another apt example.

Posted by: Hangover Black | Friday, January 07, 2011 at 03:33 PM


Considering that Bangladesh is coming up, I don't see how anyone can tell whether we've bottomed out yet.

There are always other depths to plumb.


What I worry about, seriously worry about, is that we (CA, players, assorted press) will get triumphalist if we beat the Bangers. I can see an Aussie bowler going off as Australia just manage to beat the Bangers after dismissing a tailender caught in gully off a rank swipe.


Up top, just tacked on a link to a Ricky Ponting article which calls for a review of domestic cricket.


Who was it who mentioned a dearth of 24 to 28 year old Aussie cricketers? Trevor Hohns said just that on SEN this morning.

Hohns also replied to a question about a comeback, that he would be open to rejoining the selection panel if he was asked.


Why all the blame on domestic cricket. It's easy to believe that it isn't the best it's ever been, but the problems all seem to be with the people at the top - the one's who've been not playing for their states and those around them?


Are we even playing a Test against the Bangles?

ps : the PM's XI - more of the same...shit bowling, shit catching, shit fielding

Christian to Trott, 1 run, a fumble on the off side by Ferguson, gives away a single.

Christian to Trott, FOUR, terrible delivery down the leg side, the slower ball and Trott helps it on its way to the fine leg fence.

Christian to Trott, 2 runs, tucks it off his hips to deep backward square leg.

Christian to Bell, 1 run, works it through the onside to deep midwicket.

Christian to Bell, no run, almost gives a return catch, mistimes the shot.

End of over 23 (6 runs) England XI 143/1 (80 runs required from 12 overs, RR: 6.21, RRR: 6.66) IJL Trott 32* (41b 3x4) TA Copeland 6-0-44-0
IR Bell 72* (68b 7x4)

Copeland to Trott, FOUR, makes room and square drives to the backward point fence for a boundary.

Copeland to Trott, no run

Copeland to Bell, 1 run, dropped by Ferguson, miscues in the air and Ferguson misjudges the ball and misses the catch.


$900k for Dan Christian - it's a pity there's no IPL of Tests - we coud see how the free market competes against a clique. Dan Christian can't possibly put $900k of bums on seats (couches) so they must think he has something.


Cant Say I've read through all the links in this post (and a fine peice of research it is Tony), but there seems to be a hell of a lot of blame sheeted home to the players, coaches and selectors. Very few journo's are interested in potting the management of CA.

The very same management that
- gave us a rubbish prelude to the Ashes... ODI's vs. the Lankans, AND the low value test series in India (other than the $'s).
- advised players to keep on with T20 games before the tests in India, compromising test preparations.
- has dragged its heels on action about a domestic T20 series.
- has over the last half dozen years tinkered about with the summer schedule and fixturing.
- did not back its players in the post 'Wild Dogs' Sydney test.
- that promotes the game poorly (website is rubbish).
- that allows its key assets (players) into all sorts of silly promotional nonsense that lessens 'the brand' (i.e. silly adverts).
- allows its key assets (players) to do fashion shoots etc that 'positions' them as designer-clothes-wearing-trendies) and removes them from the 'good cricketer and common man' image that Australians generally prefer in their sportsmen/women (Tall Poppy syndrome anyone?)
- increasingly communicates in 'MBA-speak' that is out of touch with the general fan base.
- that is often accused of a NSW bias (baggy green in the brown paper bag with the Waler cap), yet changes the Australian teams warm-up and casual uniform to a darker shade of NSW blue.
- that accepts major sponsorship form the Commonwealth Bank that would (arguably) be Australia's most disliked bank (for big interest rate hikes and astronomical CEO salaries)

The management (and marketing, scheduling, CONTROL) of the game in Australia needs complete review.


Christian is a shit bowler. His PR agent has been working over-time on the conjobs as his bowling is invariably expensive, regardless of what wickets he takes. In other words, shit gets wickets like the rest of our bowlers.

He can hit though.

Khawaja apparently dropped a dolly as well.


When it comes to the lead-up to the Ashes, Stakeholders has been steadfast in his defence that CA "owed" tours to India and the Shrees, so I guess we have to take him at his word. What happens next time is key. If we have the same sort of bullshit build-up in 2013 the heads that haven't already rolled (if any do after the dust is swept under the whitewash), should also roll. Stakeholders also made the point that fixturing Australia is much more difficult than fixturing England because we have to accommodate SA, SL, Ind, Pak, Bang, WI & NZ, while England is the only side that plays in the northern hemi summer. Not sure how much water that holds, but, well, whatever...


*Daniel Christian (rfm) 6.3 0 66 0 10.15 (2nb, 1w)
Beastly numbers.

No balls. Why???


No no balls by the Poms. Wides aplenty though.


I hope CA does not look to the AFL for tips on how to improve its website.


Or the WACA.

It's like something an out-of-date parson would rig up to try and get the parish monthly news out.

I swear they provide their staff with Commodore 64's.

Big Ramifications

Anyone seen the infamous tree branch rooting scene from Evil Dead?


Yep. Not nearly as hardcore as the fvcking the Poms just gave us.


Re: the Shrees/India tours. They are additional tours on the FTP, so we didn't have to play them. With respect to being "owed", if this agreement is correct, the host of the longer tour has to pay the visitor US$200k for tests and $US150k for odis. So, as far as I can tell, we don't "owe" them anything, but they might refuse to tour (or be toured) if we don't play ball.


Does Punter plan on reviewing his own structure? Such as dropping down the batting line-up? There is such buck passing going on.

It's going to wind up finally being discovered to be the fault of some u12 team in Kalgoorlie.


The Foo Fighters, to resurrect an old battle, recreated Evil Dead in one of their early videos. Sadly, no tree rooting scene.

Patard with fun and a vengeance

The Buck wants to stop the buck passing. I say bring him back.

''They need to instigate a review and then they need to set out a terms of reference of that review and hopefully that will be a quite a broad-ranging review.

1st point of reference: two articles in the press now have indicated that CA does not like the fact that the country, Australia, is a majority White nation. As a result its cricketers are majority White. CA, as indicated in these two articles referenced in prior posts, has taken it upon itself to actively pursue discriminating against that base.

Questions: Why does CA have a racist attitude towards its support base? Who is driving this racist quest? Since CA despises those who play and watch the game it presides over then those at CA who have this attitude should resign or failing that, be sacked immediately.

Patard with fun and a vengeance

Addendum: CA should at least enunciate its policy with regard "the monoculture" of Australian cricket. CA should state why having a "monoculture" is wrong and negative for cricket in Australia, especially since its Australian market is by and large that very monoculture.

Once CA enunciates why it does not value those who play and watch the game then those who play and watch the game can likewise assess if we wish to continue to play and watch the game.

Parents, such as myself, can openly review with our own terms of reference whether we would like to get our kids into cricket, watch cricket and pay for cricket or whether we might divert our children down other avenues where our involvement is considered an asset rather than a detriment to be expunged from the game.


The same CA admin that...
- promotes to a young audience, yet accepted ODI sponsorship from VB.
- allows the broadcasting of its premier product (the Ashes) to be interrupted by its 'broadcast partner' for 'dog-on-surfboards' news stories.


A different write-up on Patard's link at The Age (here), that includes the quote from Buchanan, and this also from Stakeholders...

The future of Hilditch, whose contract ends after the World Cup, and that of Nielsen, will be discussed at CA's next board meeting on February 8. CA chief executive James Sutherland says the review will feature input from cricketing experts and those outside the sport.

I read the italic/bold part as "Stakeholders is following all the valuable input from the AGB website"

Either that, or Tony should write Stakeholders and recommend himself to be part of that review. The AGB and Tones can 'bring his value' as a member of the online cricket community (i.e. a resource for stakeholders... err, I mean fans), and the weight of many blog posts and further contribution from the cricket proletariat.

Get to it Tones!!

Patard with a vengeance

The same CA admin that...
- promotes to a young audience, yet accepted ODI sponsorship from VB.

I don't see anything wrong with VB being a sponsor since the Australian culture who pays for and plays the game is largely made up of VB drinkers, or at least beer drinkers. But I suppose in this age of fuss budgetry and moral panic pandemics alcohol advertising shall have to go along with KFC and the like (promoting obesity). Who will sponsor the team then, the Yoga Ashram in the Hunter Valley? Yoplait? Yakult?

But, I can say that there is an inconsistency, hypocrisy actually, in that CA hates the "monoculture" that pays and plays its game yet seeks revenue via sponsorship from that very base.

CA should, to be consistent, seek Halal Meat sponsorship. If we aren't good enough for them then neither is our money. CA can get fucked.


England having the easiest fixturing opportunities is blindingly obvious. Pointing to the Ind/SL contracts really just shifts the blame to earlier planning, but I'm not sure there was too much wrong with the preparations anyway. The rush to India for the CSK players was a bit much, and more players should have played the two Shield games before the Tests, but apart from that...?

The trouble didn't start with this series.


Pat, I basically agree. On one hand they promote heavily to the kids, so they should be mindful of that come major sponsor signing time.
Equally, the bread and butter base audience is the VB type, like me, who gets rankled seeing the Playing Group in fashion mags with $3000 watches on.
They lose touch with their key 'demographic', and they should have better things to do (than fashion shoots)... Like prep for a ashes series.


I used to feel sorry for David Hussey. Not too sad now hearing he pockets a cool $1.4m for 3 weeks work. IPL is as evil a sporting tourmament as I can think of. Player auctions, greedy owners, nutty corrupt administrators. Plus it strikes me as deadly boring. Evil shouldn't be boring.

Big Ramifications

Evil shouldn't be boring.

Pure win!

I started "watching" it a few games before the finals began last year. I found myself easily getting distracted. Like, NOT WATCHING and playing with the computer instead. I could even hear the cheers and the commentators pumping it up, yet often wouldn't even look up to see the replay of what exactly happened.

Another tonk out into the deep. Yawn.

Tad Testy

the VB type, like me, who gets rankled seeing the Playing Group in fashion mags with $3000 watches on

I get a tad testy when talk turns to tockley.


Tockley, Tad? You been reading some 1970s' Mayfair and Men Only?


Dunno why you blokes are knocking the IPL... "Wowee! That's another DLF maximum!"


I like watching soccer and non-Nine cricket because it's good background noise. You can get on with doing something more immediately interesting and only bob your head up when the noise levels peak.


Chucked three more articles up top: Buchanan and Hohns want back in; Kim Hughes says again Ric Charlesworth should get the gig; Hilditch says he plans to stay despite Klutzy Haddin having a lash and despite the word "beleaguered" being tossed in.

Beleaguered is an omen word. Works a bit like "We stand firmly behind the coach, he has out full and absolute support... and we will be appointing a new coach in the morning."


Oh, and I agree with Jonathon. The lead up was a fiasco, but it is not the reason we got belted. The reasons we copped a shellacking were evident well in advance: bowling, poor batting, poor selections, poor fielding, poor catching, poor captaincy, piss poor poorness. It was plain as the nose on your face during the 2009 WI series.


Yes, it was. Indeed. Verily, verily. Why don't the selectors and CA read AGB - then they would have had advance warning.

Though I'm not sure that CA care about having lost the series in truth. I'm sure they are hoping that the Ashes can be cut to 3 matches so they can add in 20 more t20's to the tour.

Big Ramifications

Were Bigthick Ric's achievements as Hockeyroos over rated from a coaching point of view?

I wonder if he simply was involved in a semi professional sport and just made our girls a lot more professional. And he did it first. I'm not 100% certain about this, it's just a feeling I get about the guy [and the era].

re: His coaching style. Do female and male teams respond differently to different coaching personality types? Serious question [I bet there's a study on it buried in some ANNAL somewhere]. Is his style more suited to coaching females?

He's had other coaching jobs. How'd he go?


David Hussey is back in the ODI team. And Nathan Hauritz.


I'm a big Charlesworth fan, but then I'm from WA and played hockey for a long time in my youth and twenties. He strides over that sport.

He has got a very good brain. That is probably enough to shoot down any chances of him doing well with the Aussie cricket team. I think he has a talent for tactics and strategy as much as anything when it comes to hockey. The Kookas appear to 'run over' teams and their passing at speed is something to behold. If you watch modern hockey, it is a ludicrously different sport to something like cricket, so I have no idea if his particular skills are transferable. I know one thing, he's never satisfied, no matter how well the team plays, I can't see how you'd get the guff from him that we are fed by all and sundry.

He also has a penchant for sitting out 'name' players from big tournaments to bring on youth so players don't get a chance to sit on their laurels. Plus he has introduced the multi-captain gig. Which doesn't make a huge amount of difference in hockey, apart from maybe calling plays at penalty corners, but the hitters might call them anyway.

But anyhow, I don't want him near the cricket team till the Kookas have won the gold at 2012 Olympics.

Big Ramifications

I think he has a talent for tactis and strategy as much as anything when it comes to hockey.

Thanks, Lou. That's what I wanted cleared up. I was wondering what % of his success was just him being a good organiser of people, and simple things like introducing weights programs and flexibility sessions, increased focus on fitness, regular testing etc.


CA spammed me twice today. Remember last year, how the ODI crowds in Melbourne were down because they had two games in 3 days, the second on a Sunday, and people said that was a bad idea. Can anyone explain why CA scheduled a T20 and an ODI on the same weekend in Melbourne, again? Will anyone turn up for the ODI?

The second was a survey asking what my favourite name for the new T20 franchises in Victoria would be, it was presaged by some so cringe-worthy it needs requoting:

Team A

This team will welcome the whole community of Victorian cricket fans, but it will, in particular, represent those areas that have historically been less affluent and are now undergoing an economic and cultural renewal.

Historically, these communities do not come from well-established cricket traditions – footy and soccer are generally their sports of choice – but the time has come to forge their own cricket team playing on the national stage. The new team will reflect the dynamism and energy of the people living in those areas of Melbourne and Victoria.

Fresh, multicultural, gutsy and hungry for success, nothing will stop it. The new team will be cricket’s new kid on the block. It will be the future of cricket!

Team B

This team will welcome the whole community of Victorian cricket fans, but it will, in particular, represent the community of fans who have cricket in their blood having played and watched it since they were kids.

This team will be inspired by the talent and style found in the most prestigious cricketing traditions, reinterpreted through the fast pace and irreverence of the Twenty20 format.

Dashing and talented, this new team will be the shining light in the new Big Bash League!

The prospective names for multi-cultural team A: Blitz, Renegades, Slam, Lightning, Crushers, Destroyers, Rampage, Rumble. And old-school team B: Hammer, Mercury, Majors, Maxx, Dukes, Guns.

Which apart from being generic and just awful, also appear to be slightly racist.

Originally I thought I'd go to games for both Victorian teams (unless they were in Geelong), but now I'm not sure I want to go to either. Perhaps I am not their demographic.

Big Ramifications

I like "Slam" coz it reminds me of a "shit slammer."

And agreed: cringe-worthy. I thought you were having a lend.

Patard with fun and a vengeance

Yes, I see what you mean Russ about Team B's names being only slightly racist. My suggestions: The Supremacists, Waften SS, Krown Kasino Kricketers (splendid sponsorship opportunity).

Team A's names seem mostly apt, though Tones' one for the Western Syd Team would be good; The Ramraiders. But also The Machetes, The King Hits, The Drive-Bys, Melbourne Diversity (awesome name), Incandescents, The Heevejabs, Bonza Burkers, Division, Scowling Menace, Never Satisfieds, Spankers, Whining Whingers, Grasbys etc etc.

Big Ramifications

The Unruly Habibs.

[not my own work - saw it as a comment once, describing a "courtroom steps" fight with the media]

Patard with fun and a vengeance

I like The Unruly Habibs. Certainly a team to watch.

Team B's uniform discussions.

David Barry

Team A: the Victorian Aspirational Voters.

It's definitely cringe-worthy reading the process of choosing a team name, but once they start playing it'll just be a name.

Big Ramifications

It's definitely cringe-worthy reading the process of choosing a team name, but once they start playing it'll just be a name.

Funny thing is, when the Dockers came on the scene they were marketed as WERKING CLASS. And, by deduction [or is that induction?] the Eagles were silvertails.

Even 18 years down the track, that's how a lot of people identify with them. Young bogans everywhere will be choosing to support the Dockers... because they wouldn't be seen dead going for those stupid Western Suburbs Eagles, and daddy bogan wouldn't let them anyway.

Erm. So I sorta disagree with you.

Hangover Black

Since the Dorkers have been mentioned - Ric Charlesworth was working with them in some capacity for a few years recently (mid 2000s maybe). They didn't improve much during his time there from what I can recall.

Big Ramifications

"Excellence coach," or something equally wishy-washy. Yes, HBlack, his impact was non existent.


I don't see how a hockey/cricket player turned coach would be much use at AFL. But then the Docker's struggled for ages regardless.

He's a good hockey coach, but he has at the moment some stonking talent at his disposal.


Like what Hilditch says in that article.

"I only do it for one reason and that is.. because I'm mad, ha, ha, mad as mad Bertha from Jane Eyre, I'm going to take you all down with me, leaping from the roof of a burning mansion that is cricket in Australia, ha,ha,ha,ha, wheeeeeeeeeeee" he told reporters in Adelaide today while running naked through the centre of the Botanical Gardens.


Russ, Kiki & Sassy are the demographic.


By the way, "blog" instead of a "post"? So, so wrong:

"Stay tuned for our next blog where we, you know, actually talk more about cricket".


I wonder if he simply was involved in a semi professional sport and just made our girls a lot more professional. And he did it first. I'm not 100% certain about this, it's just a feeling I get about the guy [and the era].

I've been banging on about this for years. It's not just a phenomenon restricted to hockey. We embarked on out own Little East Germany after 1976 but it was only a matter of time until other countries resolved to money up.

Mute as a button: And how about our mighty Aussies? With all those other countries now throwing booty at their own athletes, it can only be a matter of time until we fail to reach our medal count... sorry, medal tally from the Athens Olympics - Sydney? That's just so 8 years ago - and the athletic people start screaming for more money.

Other countries are now catching up:

South Germany: AUSTRALIA’s athletes set off for the Olympic Games in Canada in July 1976 in what were, even for the 1970s, horrible uniforms, but with high hopes. We had done well in Munich four years earlier, winning eight gold and seventeen medals overall, placing us sixth on the medal tally.

And since * cough * all the best sportsmen play AFL:

Maybe I'm amazed: "Maybe once mainstream sports have filled their quotas with male performers, then it's... you can't get the critical mass of elite male athletes to get a winning male combination at the Olympics. You end up with the kids who couldn't play footy, rugby, cricket or soccer."

Added another article to the bottom of the top which contains this doozy:

"We're [Poms] lucky to have guys who are upfront, who'll be visible, who'll take responsibility and if something's wrong they'll put their hands up."

Russ, I've googled that CA survey a couple of times, but it only shows up on a couple of blogs (one mentions Crikey) and big footy. Is it fair dinkum?


Tony: http://www.surveymonkey.com/t20victoria.


DB, to the extent that teams are marketing to particular groups, it never hurts to have a name that appeals to those groups. I quite like the Dockers as a nickname, it is representative of the area they come from without being completely naff: their jersey, theme-song and giant anchor suck, but they have a good name.

What I don't get is why the survey would choose names so bland and generic (the Tasmanian (t20tasmania) one is as bad, if not worse). If they want to appeal to a multi-cultural community, why not suggest a simple name like Melbourne Migrants. Which appeals to an aspect of Victorian history, and it isn't borderline racist.

Sydney Solipsists would work similarly - perfect for players from the current test team.

Anyway, shouldn't the team be named by the owning franchise? Isn't that the point of buying a franchise, so you can run it?


I was emailed/tweeted the same link. Bit of a waste of time, I think. Why not expand the T20 we have now, with a Canberra team, and bring in a few (say three) UnZud teams?
This would yield a 10 team comp. (QLD, NSW, ACT, Vic, Tas, SA, WA, Auclkland, Wellington and South Island), which is a nice number... Two groups of 5, 4 games per team (home or away, not home and away)... Best two from each pool into semis and then finals.

Not sure why you would need to tinker with the current Aust system.

Big Ramifications

You and me, Tone.

Another good example was South vs. North hemisphere rugby union. The North were jokes for a few years back in the 1990s [mainly size wise]. Remember when Jonah stomped thru the English back line like they were boys...

Or women's road walking. Kerry Saxby for GG!


Or Emma George, the girl who had 1,567 women's pole vault records before women's pole vaulting cracked a run in the Olympics.

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