SECOND TEST: ADELAIDE OVAL

So, the pathetic Windies were stomped by a dominant Australia at the Gabba. Are the Windies really that bad? Are Australia really that good?

Unlikely.

Several West Indian batsmen donated their wickets to the Australian bowlers. Had Bravo and Chanderpaul, among other culprits, not been so generous, the Aussie bowlers may have struggled to winkle them out. That continues to be the key issue for Aussie cricket since the retirements of Warne and McGrath. Bollocks to your rebuilding phases. Find another Warne - the greatest match-winner in Test history - and you will kick-start another dynasty. Until then we will scrap with SA, India and England for Test supremacy. Sure, we'll win more than we lose, the scrubbers will see to that as they feed our Test averages, but the glory days are done for now. Richie was right: "You won't miss Warne until he's gone."

Nor did the Australian batsmen set the world on fire; the West Indian bowlers regularly induced mistakes. How long has it been since an Aussie made a 200? Was Dizzy the last? The current line-up is steady without being great. Ponting seems less intent on making runs and more intent on making a point. LBWatson is a fine batsman, but can't continue to open if he keeps getting stranded plumb in front. There are as many questions about Clarke's back as there are questions about his relationship with La Bingle. Katich and Hussey are coming to the end. Could it be the North is our most important batsman?

As for the Windies' prospects, over to you Tony Cozier:

Undeserving abuse for Windies

NO ONE is more painfully aware of the rapid disintegration of West Indies cricket than West Indians themselves.

For all that, the abuse and scorn heaped on the team in the Australian press following its defeat in the first Test in Brisbane last week--by an innings and in three days-was undeserving. Much of it was simply beyond the pale.

(Via TCWJ.)

There are obvious flaws in Tony's case - the comparison between Australian cricket in the mid 1980s with West Indian cricket in the 2000s is invalid - but it's refreshing to read a passionate defence of West Indian cricket. The "whimpering exit from the captaincy" was a tasty barb, too.

Anyhoo, Straya aren't all that great, and the West Indies aren't as completely dreadful as Malcolm Conn, Ben Dorries and Kim Hughes make out; although, I suspect they know that, but why let perspective get in the way of a juicy sledge.

Comments

[Tony]

Good toss to win? Stupid question where Ponting's involved. Windies to bat.

Nicholas" It's the anthems when we come back." Can't wait. When, precisely, did we become obsessed with the anthem? I blame John...

Williamson.

[Tony]

Chappelli just made the sensible call: without Hilfenhaus, Gayle is a big threat. On the Adelaide track, against Siddle, Bolly and Johnson, Gayle will fancy his chances.

[Tony]

So, ummm, Bolly, how's that throat business working out so far?

Australia paceman Doug Bollinger won't show the West Indies any mercy

"I am happy to take five of their throats, if you like. It doesn't bother me."

Two overs, 0/18.

[Tony]

The the Heart Rate Gator Tracker is the stupidest graphic gimmick since the 3 Ball Tracker.

[Tony]

Barath gawn. Bolly strikes. Never in doubt!

1/26.

Scorcher from Hulley in the Gussey.

[Tony]

Gayle gone. Bolly again. Two throats.

2/39.

Caught Klutz. Lame shot.

[m0nty]

Such p1ssweak dismissals. What a bore.

[The Don has risen]

I am sure the Windies are my U/12 team. They play shots like them and ignore simple advice like them too.

There was no Gayle not even a breeze

[Jonathan]

Kim Hughes' problem wasn't that he thought the Windies are bad, but that he thought they weren't taking it seriously. Mind you, a few of the reasons he gives for that are pretty widespread outside the Carribean too. Gayle's comments seem to have stuck in a few minds.

[Tony]

Sarwan out. Studsy strikes.

3/84.

Soft drive to a good length ball. Did Studs take the pace off it? Hard to tell. Careless shot.

[m0nty]

Another unnecessarily uppish shot to an average ball to get out. Not so much drowning in honey as spreading the Vegemite.

[Tony]

Jonathan, that's right about Hughes' comments. But I reckon he's a red rag to the West Indian bull. Any time he critiques them, they have a ready-made comeback.

You know that joke about the bloke having sex with "only one goat"? Well, for Hughes and the Windies it's "but I only cried once."

[Tony]

Glenn Mitchell, just GO AWAY!!! please.

[Russ]

Just checking in. Rapid session of run-scoring and dodgy shots. But I have to ask: why is Studs bowling around the wicket to a right-hander?

[Tony]

Speaking of the mid-80s, all these leg-side balls are reminding me of our sloppy line of attack to Chris Broad in 1986/87. We've been spoiled by McGrath. Mind you, there seems to be a concerted attempt to get the ball swinging in to the batsmen.

[The Don has risen]

why can't the Windies manager garner their talent?

[m0nty]

The Windies can't garner, marshall or keep holding any talent because they keep walshing on the golf course while playing ambrose with the bishop on the croft outside Griffith, according to Craddock's opinion (i.e. Robert's). You could hear the patters on the tiles in the hall for weeks.

[Hangover Black]

Too good, Mont.

[The Don has risen]

I must signal fore

[m0nty]

That was a bit of a conversation stopper, apparently. Or maybe it was the soporificity of the day's play. Tell me again, why are they building a 55,000 seat stadium for a pitch that's so bland?

[Russ]

Adelaide is always bland for the first few days m0nty. I was about to comment that the Windies were a bit slow, but actually it looks like it is not them but our over-rate (again). -8 is pretty poor. Ritz might get a workout this afternoon.

[m0nty]

I look forward to Chad Cornes swearing at the fig tree and giving the finger to the hill.

[m0nty]

Oh, Paper Cut, what high comedy. Buster Keaton couldn't have made that Classic Drop look any funnier.

[Tony]

Been out all arvo. What's the story on Chanders' referral?

[Adsy]

Question: Are umpires more likely now to give close nicks not out because of the technology, whereas they were beforehand? I think both of those were pretty straightforward in real time, but like close to the ground catches the technology brings in doubt when it really shouldn't.

By the way, which ICC nuffy excluded Snicko for catches behind, but included Hawkeye for LBW's??

[m0nty]

Note to Australian batsmen: it is possible in the game of cricket for an individual's rul tally to go into three figures.

[Tony]

Well, that Watson/Bravo LB referral was never out. Always high.

[Tony]

Bravo beaten by an exploding straight one from the Ritzecutioner.

6/274.

Usually the ball turns to beat the bat. This time the bat turned to beat the ball.

[Tony]

Are the Classic Catches... sorry, Schweppes Classic Catches cheating by having Slogger Slatts include catches from 30 years ago?

[Tony]

76 overs so far. What time are they playing to?

[m0nty]

Half past four on Sunday, I think.

[Tony]

May as well be 6:00 pm on Friday. Bastard Channel Nine.

[Big Ramifications]

NO ONE is more painfully aware of the rapid disintegration of West Indies cricket than West Indians themselves.

I remember yonks ago [when the Windies were still kick-ass] reading in an esteemed sports column that West Indies cricket was doomed. Sorta the post Lloyd / Roberts era... and the next generation [Richardson / Ambrose] were 3 or so years from retirement.

The reason given was there were no youngsters coming thru because NBA was so farking huge at the time and everyone in the islands was playing basketball. Further, the column added, that this was a hate-whitey backlash and that the yoof of the region identified more with their black brothers in the USA and cricket was an ugly reminder of white rule.

Make of that what you will. I didn’t imagine reading it, and my English comprehension skills are without peer, so I certainly wasn’t reading too much into the racism angle. Or what ever word you want to call it.

[Big Ramifications]

...Pretty sure they didn't use the term "hate-whitey" but that's exactly what the column was implying. I added that for troll reasons because I am a troll in my spare time.

[Big Rammer's Mum]

Spare time?

[Big Rammer's Mum]

Several West Indian batsmen donated their wickets to the Australian bowlers. Had Bravo and Chanderpaul, among other culprits, not been so generous...

I think Tony's mentioned it in a recent post in his blog: an almost identical maawvelous cracking shot for 4 becomes a "rash" dismissal, depending on the outcome.

But Gayle's dismissal in the first innings of the first test was one of the most WOEFUL shots I've ever seen from a recognised batsman. And what makes it even worse from a personal PoV is that 95% of *ahem* technical dissection of batsmen from the commentary team [Chappell, Slats, Healy are the main offenders] goes completely over my head.

But even I'm going "Shiiiaaaaat! Damn that was ugly."

DISCLAIMERS:
Might have been the jetlag?
I've only seen the dismissal once.

[Big Ramifications]

Mum, if ya wanna jump on the computer and defame me could you at least log out so I don't post a comment in your name.

[Yobbo]

How long has it been since an Aussie made a 200? Was Dizzy the last?

Brad Hodge vs the saffers?

But I have to ask: why is Studs bowling around the wicket to a right-hander?

Because he can't swing it, and that's the only way he can attack the stumps. Otherwise a right-handed batsman can just leave literally every ball he bowls. He can't get an LBW because of the angle, and he can't get a bowled because the pads are in the way. So a patient batsman can just ropeadope him all day long.

The bouncer is the only dangerous ball he has, since the batsman *has* to do something with that.

[Vindicate]

Ab. so. lute. ly. PLUM!

[Tony]

That was even more plumb than Gayle in Brisbane.

[Tony]

Tubby called it a "frivvarous review".

[Tony]

Yob. Hodge made his 200 in December 2005; Dizzy made his in April 2006.

[pat]

I agree with KOK's post stumps analysis yesterday that anything shy of 400 was a failure for the Windies. But I'd also add that Oz not going on to wipe them for around 300 was a failure for us.

So not much really for either team.

Fruity should've been bowled more and Studdsy should be dropped. Why do we drop batsmen (like Phillips) who perform but not as expected but not bowlers who exhibit the same behaviour. I'm sick of Studsy being trumpeted as our best bowler, when the fact is he can't handle the new ball.

Anyway, back to blowing the roof gutters, edges and mowing the lawn. Should be a good drinking session this afternoon with....hmm, pretty sad when I can't get enthused about watching a batsman's performance. Really wish Phillips was opening and Paper Cut coming in later. Can't stand watching Kat and Punter's too temperamental. I hope North gets a ton and Klutz goes on the charge. Bout it really.

[m0nty]

Tubby to star as Kim Jong-Il in Team America 2.

[pat]

That's the thing about DoS too. He may have been an FTB but that's what I want to see this arvo when I get a chance to sit down with several beers watching the cricket. I want to see a batsman take it to the Windy bowlers and carve a big hundred. But it's more like we'll see a few blokes guts out some tons. Kat will ugly his way to one. Shouldn't complain but it's not only Warne I miss.

[Tony]

The setting is ripe for someone to drop a costly catch, probably Haddin.

[Tony]

"The West Indies, LBW, referral and plumb."

Discuss.

[m0nty]

I think maybe the Windies boys like to go to the club and do the YMCA dance. They seem to love making letters with their arms.

[pat]

Windies may have done enough now to shut out a result. Well done to them.

[m0nty]

Nah, Aussies are well within their capabilities to knock up 650 and skittle the Windies for 200 with a day to spare.

[pat]

That'd be good and it's exactly what I want to see.

[Tony]

Can I just ask a pertinent question? During the First Test Kerry O'Keefe, among others, loudly and laughingly took the piss out of Rampaul's batting. The consensus was that Ravi is a complete hack who would be lucky to last his first over at the crease. The question: had they ever previously seen Rampaul bat?

[m0nty]

Team Nash has been the highlight of the cricket season so far. Will be hard to top.

[Tony]

Windies all out 451. Eventually.

Another question: Is Johnson worth the effort? I mean, occasionally he bowls a jaffa, but far more frequently he bowls pies, tripe, and other shitful digestives.

[Tony]

Team Nash: a nice set of figures.

[Vindicate]

Jesus Watto, just get some bat on it!

[Tony]

LBWatson.

[Tony]

Old habits die hard, with a vengeance, too. (Get it? That's really quite funny, in a humourous way.) The referral system hasn't stopped bowlers appealing to elbee when the batsman smashes it onto his pads.

[Tony]

Is that real or merely professional unction the Dick is applying to Richie's feet?

[Tony]

1993. SACA. Aus v WI. Richie, Hair, Courtney Woltch, McDermott - ALL wrong. "One of the great decisions." Balls! Hair was guessing. McDermott missed that ball.

Bitter? You betcha.

[m0nty]

This is just the sort of flat track where PC can pull his Haydos Lite bullying act without challenge. Then get out for 70-odd when all the hard work has been done.

[Tony]

I used to play cricket on one of the ovals at Fawkner Park in Prahran. Or is it South Yarra, down there at Commercial Road across the road from the Alfred? Anyway, the short square boundaries at the SACA remind me of the short square at Fawk Park.

[Tony]

Why has Glen MITCHELL commentated EVERY moment of this Test? Or, what seems like EVERY moment?

[Tony]

A run-out would not make me happy. Nor would an injury to The Indestructible Paper Cut of Steel resulting from an ambitions run.

[Tony]

The driver of the giant Gatorade drinks dispenser should have a heart rate monitor.

[Tony]

Tell ya nuthin' for sumthin'.

We were robbed an international incident of controversy, bad manners and intemperate cricket warriors when the Windies decided not to appeal Katich's slap at the ball.

[Tony]

It's a beautiful day today; sun's out, light breeze, spring delight. So how come everyone's not inside, red cordial, blinds drawn, watching the cricket and blogging?

[Tony]

Ooo. Spite. Noice.

[Tony]

Why Australians are better than the rest: We don't touch gloves.

[Tony]

Put a SOCK IN IT, Glenn Mitchell.

[m0nty]

I applaud the innovation of ABC Grandstand putting KOK jokes in podcast form on its Web site. Hopefully he can eventually be moved there permanently, so that cricket broadcasts can be reserved for talk of cricket.

[pat]

Spot on Mont, the man is just not that funny.

I thought the game went to 1830 Eastern Seaboard but it goes to 1730 SA time. Is that a new thing?

Thought I could get a half hour in but the radio can't pick up ABC (sounds like a good thing), Nein have shown how much they respect the game by going to the news and in any case there's 2 overs to go. Damn!

[pat]

Bit selfish of Krab not to hand the strike to Paper so he could get his ton.

[pat]

"Another question: Is Johnson worth the effort? I mean, occasionally he bowls a jaffa, but far more frequently he bowls pies, tripe, and other shitful digestives."

I said @ 11:46 "Fruity should've been bowled more and Studdsy should be dropped. Why do we drop batsmen (like Phillips) who perform but not as expected but not bowlers who exhibit the same behaviour. I'm sick of Studsy being trumpeted as our best bowler, when the fact is he can't handle the new ball."

[Tony]

That makes two votes. Now, if we can just get Hilditch on side...

[Tony]

Haa!

I was halfway through a comment about how Watson was a certainty to get out before he got a hundred.

Goose.

[Tony]

That comment was going to be in response to the Herald Sun's stupid back page headline: "Watson's unbeaten 96 answers his critics MONKEY OFF HIS BACK"

What was that I was saying about perspective? Idiots.

[Tony]

When does "CATCH IT!!!" break the rules, sorry Laws? For just about every scoring shot this morning one of the Windies players has yelled it out, even if the ball went along the ground. The thing is, the time gap between the shot and the shout is getting shorter and shorter. It can only be a matter of time - literally and metaphorically - before the bowler starts using "CATCH IT!!!" to distract batsman as he plays the shot. It certainly happens at club level.

[m0nty]

I was 20 runs short in my comment yesterday at 4:05pm, but it came true anyway.

[Tony]

Glenn Mitchell: "Fancy the West Indies bowling two spinners; you wouldn't have seen that in the 1970s and 1980s."

Au contraire, SHOUT-GO-ROUND. Albert Padmore & Imtiaz Ali; Albert Padmore and Raphick Jumadeen; Larry Gomes & Viv Richards.

[Tony]

Mont, 20 runs closer and you get the MONKEY OFF YOUR BACK.

[Tony]

Blimey! The commentators are working overtime to sell the Adelaide Oval rennos.

There aren't enough words in the world to fill the myriad gaps where they used to say "Adelaide Oval is the most beautiful oval in cricket."

[m0nty]

Not to mention Roger Harper. Also Lance Gibbs played his last test in 1976.

[Tony]

Spot on. Harper bowled with I.V.A. and Gibbs would have bowled with a host of spinners between 1970 and 1976 and before the Windies decided on all-out mugging.

[Vindicate]

450 mill to redevelop a cricket ground? Are they building the stands out of gold bullion?

[Tony]

The main grandstand is a replica of Mike Rann's desk.

[m0nty]

I like watching Big Benn's face after the batsman gets lucky with a bad shot. He does such an expressive line of hurt, bemused helplessness.

[m0nty]

Punter, Punter, Punter.

[Vindicate]

Now we get to find out if Pup is overrated.

[Tony]

Ponting gawn.

3/233.

The WI bowling has been excellent this morning.

[Tony]

Lets see.

3/233. Still 218 behind. Australia batting last. WI have a handy spinner; an offie, who, despite commentary to the contrary, Australia often struggle with.

Some might say "game on", I say it's bordering on "game over".

I blame Paper Cut.

[Vindicate]

Coat of varnish in that.

[m0nty]

Have we had an upheld referral yet in the series? The umps are having a blinder.

[Tony]

The Watson/Chanders/Haddin "catch" was an upheld appeal. However, it could fairly be said the on-field umpires still had a blinder there, whereas Friday's third-umpire, Rauf Mauf, somehow slipped a howler past the howler-prevention technology.

[Tony]

One more run to avoid the follow on.

Aaaand there it is.

We rock.

[Tony]

Aaaand there goes Clarke with a loose shot right before a break.

Swipey.

[Tony]

Aaaand there goes Clarke with another loose shot right before a break.

Double swipey.

[m0nty]

Pup did his best to get out on that last ball before lunch, didn't he?

[Tony]

Aaaand there goes Clarke with a leading edge which dropped just out of reach of short mid-off right before a break.

Ugly.

[Tony]

Stakeholders on the ABC talking pies.