NO-RAIN MAN

Today in The Age, Spanky Roebuck harks back to 2001 to preview the test series against New Z'Lund; see if you can spot what's missing.

Australians ready to blunt visitors' determination

Stephen Fleming's hopes of catching Australia on the hop seem slim. Last time around, the Kiwis arrived with a plan founded upon resolute batting and tactics that exposed dark corners of an ageing home side.

Fleming set the tone with astute field placements, a rousing innings and a declaration in Brisbane that obliged the hosts to respond. Chris Cairns led the charge towards victory on a gripping fifth afternoon. Australia was saved by an over from Glenn McGrath directed wide of the stumps.

Sustaining its challenge, NZ secured a draw in Hobart and almost won a topsy-turvy contest in Perth, only to be denied by poor umpiring and a withering innings from Adam Gilchrist.

Fleming and company left Australia with reputations enhanced and everyone realising that their high position in the rankings was not an aberration but a reward for consistent performances over several years.

NZ's achievement was founded upon the underdog's delight in tweaking the beard of a vast neighbour occasionally suspected of self-aggrandisement, upon the inclusion of many underestimated players and upon an understanding of the Australian psyche and strategy. Kiwis are inclined to think that Australians make a lot of noise.

NZ was at the peak of its powers and the host was taken aback. Fleming and colleagues forced the local pace bowlers to abandon their customary and conservative line of attack by the simple device of refusing to play anything not directed at the stumps.

Compromising fields were set for the Waugh twins and Damien Martyn and none of them had a happy time. Unable to recover its equanimity and sustained largely by its opening pair, Australia was lucky to escape with a drawn series.

If you said "rain" you win the prize.

Sure the last series was close, the Kiwis played some excellent cricket, but were it not for significant rain in Brisbane and Hobart, Australia would have been comfortably 2-0 up going into Perth's third test. There, after Enzed had TWICE gotten out of jail, Australia were ripe to be ambushed.

In Brisbane, the only reason New Zealand and Cairns, in particular, were able to mount an aggressive fifth day chase was that they were playing on a third day wicket (always the best at the Gabba) and within what amounted to a One-Day backdrop after (in my opinion) an overgenerous declaration from Steve Waugh.

Hobart was a bust, but Australia made over 500 and had NZ almost skittled for under 300 when rain washed out the game.

Then in Perth, where New Zealand played out of their collective skins, Australia counter-attacked and were heading for an unlikely win when Steve Waugh was dismissed courtesy of a unlucky run-out via a smack from Gilchrist that would have been four, but instead bounced of Vettori's hand and onto the non-striker's wicket.

I accept the series turned out close, but to suggest "Australia was lucky to escape with a drawn series", is OK if set within Roebuck's TYPICALLY selective context, but absolutely farcical in the wider picture.

For all the excellent articles Roebuck pen, he sure does write a whole heap of disingenuous nonsense.

Comments

[Scott Wickstein]

Yes, Mr Roebuck does, err, embellish reality sometimes to promote the idea that we're going to get some competitive cricket.

5 for 142 at tea. Here we go again.

[Emily]

Actually Tony I was going to say 'reality' but rain will do.

Scott don't be so mean, we can't help the fact that you are a far superior side. But I hope we can get some moments of genuine competition in the tests. There is nothing better than playing Australia in a test series in Australia.

Oh there's McMillan gone. Yep we are off to a great start :)

[Scott Wickstein]

Emily I like competitive cricket as much as anyone, but the fact is that New Zealands batsmen have thrown their wickets away under the pressure of what I must frankly say is very average bowling.

[Adsy]

It's all about providing copy for the newspapers and getting up the back of everyone who takes at least a half interested look at the cricket. Take the Indian tour for example. All the supposed experts pointed back to the sterling job they did in Australia and said they would do the same the next series in India. Bup Bah... wrong answer.

New Zealand put up a half reasonable show the last series vs the Aussies and the same experts are dribbling the same tripe. It's as if they are trumpeting up the visitors to get a half decent contest out of it.

[Dirk Thruster]

Off topic, sort of. Was listening on the wireless in the tractor today and Greg Chappell was asked about the new chucking laws. After much rigmarole the conversation turned to Murali's comments about the Oz bowlers and his statement that he was being singled out because he's Sri Lankan - including his statement that if he were Australian, no-one would question his action.
Chappell said (among several other, unusually vehement things) that "the only reason he's got 500 wickets is because he's Sri Lankan. If he was Australian he would never have played test cricket with an action like that."

[Emily]

Oh I agree with you entirely Scott, I just live in hope. I imagine that will be knocked out of me by the end of the series though.

[Scott Wickstein]

I'm still going to the Adelaide Oval next week though :D

[Tony.T]

Judging from what I've seen it's going to be a tight series. The Kiwis are bowling really well, and they've come with a batting attack guaranteed to eke out at least three hundred each time. Unless the Aussies can bat first in Adelaide and rack up a big score, I predict the series will be drawn.

IN fact, the way the Kiwi's are bowling at the moment and with the Aussies to bet last, I wouldn't be surpriesd to see them win this test.

[Scott Wickstein]

You what? Steady there Tony....

[Tony.T]

It appears to me we did it a lot tougher than the Kiwis, Wicky. None of our batsmen looked comfortable, whereas their's got themselves out, or looked fine.

If we want to win, we need to get at least 100 in front, and that looks difficult at the moment, then rip through their top order on day four. They bat very low and I can't see us rolling them easily which means they should be able to string the game out for, at worst, a draw.

Above, did I say "bet last"? A touch indelicate.

[Brett Pee]

Only we did not account for old Jacob Oram-Utang and his astute sheperding of the tail to see them through to a respectable 353. Is this the same Kiwi batting line up that received a severe spanking down in Pom land ? Tony, for christs sake do not, under any circumstances, state that we could lose to the Kiwis-it's tantamount to sacrilige. Now is the time for us to see what the Tyro Clarke is all about on the 3rd day, is he mentally tough to withstand some verbal barrage and go on to a valuable ton and a lead, we wait and see. The Kiwis are ALWAYS up for series over here but it's also up to us to show even more grit & determination.

Errrrr..... what the hell is Boofa doing in the side ?

[Tony.T]

The test in evenly poised and with the Kiwi bowlers going rather nicely, we'd better keep it together otherwise we'll be in trouble.

[Scott Wickstein]

I sense a 'mozz' coming on...

[Tony.T]

Wicky, the long answer is that after the flops of the eighties, the day five collapses, the continued failure to win close ones and the fact New Zealand nearly always play well against Australia, even when they're an inferior side, I am always circumspect when a match is tight and have experienced too much anguish to ever get ahead of myself. In fact, I find it excedingly hard to watch close matches because my expectation is we'll nearly always lose. I love watching test cricket, but I hate the fact I struggle to watch the better games. It shits me!

The short answer is, SPRUNG.

[Scott Wickstein]

Well, do you feel better now? McGrath 53 not out.. the world is off its axis...

[Tony.T]

McGrath 50. BIZARRE. That over where McCullum and Richardson dropped him will really hurt overnight. Richo's was just a mix-up, but it was very ordinary glovework from the keeper. Perhaps he's been taking tips off the Parti Boy.

I was panicking when Clarke and Gilly gave their wickets away. The Aussies, leading by only about 100, and with the pitch obviously playing well, were ripe to get stuffed by a fifth day chase of two hundred odd, but the mozz went to work. At least for the moment.

Now if the pitch plays to form, it looks like the Kiwis will lead by around 100 at stumps tomorrow. Then it's up to them to set a target on the fifth day, but I expect them to be conservative.

At the moment, unless we bowl way better than in the first innings (and set waaaay better fields), it looks like a draw because I don't expect us to scythe through them.

[Brett Pee]

Clarkie has lived up to the hype, we can now look forward to 12 years of consistent run getting. Now all we need is a young bowler his age to compliment him.

[Emily]

Fantastic, nothing like being a New Zealand cricket supporter. They bring so much joy.
But congratulations, especially to McGrath.

[Tony.T]

Condolences, Emily. That would have been painful.

[Scott Wickstein]

How'd you fancy being Daniel Vetorri? He's going to get a mighty serve from the Adelaide Oval crowd for being so crap that McGrath hit him for six.

[Tony.T]

Good. Give 'im hell, Wicky.

[Brett Pee]

76 all out ?? Well, that was an infinitely better bowling performance from the 1st dig. Still plenty of life in the 'oldies' yet, with McGrath looking particularly rampant and Warnie enjoying himself. I also want to give Vettori some good, old fashioned abuse-mainly for being the first bespectacled geek on the Test Arena.

[Tony.T]

What about David Steele? And Geoff Boycott wore glasses when he started playing tests. And Dirk Wellham? And David Bryant? No. Wait. He played bowls.

[Brett Pee]

Not sure who David Steele is, and bowls is the most mind numbingly dull 'sport' on this earth-most of the fossils who take part in it probably need speccies to see down the other end. BUT....Vettori is markedly overrated for a leftie spinner, don't know how he has taken so many test victims, are there any more spinners over there ?

[Brett Pee]

Well, anyway, there looked like some dodgy Umpiring today from what i could tell- their Keeper McCullum, what did he edge ? Thin air ? And Sinclair ? Even to a heavily partisan, pro-aussie anti Kiwi such as myself the ball was heading over the sticks for that lbeeeewww. Oh well, perhaps i might have given it after all !!! At least McMillan showed some spunk, verbal anyway when he engaged Gilly behind the stumps over a disputed catch, apart from that they wilted. Onto the next mismatch, sorry, test.

[Dirk Thruster]

Didn't get to see any of this match, but in the past I thought Vettori showed a lot of discipline and fighting spirit.

[Tony.T]

David Steele made runs against the Aussies in 1975. After the way he got out in the first innings and the way he got out in the second, there's only one conclusion; McMillan's a goose.

Vettori is better than he showed. Kiwis missed Bond.

[Brett Pee]

Bond ? Shames Bond ?

[Tony.T]

Nope, he likes sport; Games Bond.

[Emily]

With 2 steel rods in his back, perhaps Lames Bond?
This cartoon is quite funny.
http://www.nzcartoons.co.nz/_cartoonists_pages/tremain/241104.htm

[Tony.T]

Now, Emily. That's harsh.

Harsh, but harsh.