After Grog Blog

"Virutally unintelligible to non-Australians" -- Harry Hutton

UNDERBELLY: KNIFE & FORK

A member of the Carlton Crew comes clean:

Wayne Harmes admits to stealing cutlery from The Lodge

ONE of Carlton's premiership greats has admitted to stealing cutlery from The Lodge after a celebratory dinner 30 years ago.

"I think he (Mr Fraser) knew when I shook hands with him leaving that my top pocket was shaking like a cutlery cupboard."

Meanwhile, another member of the Carlton Crew is barred from the Lodge:

$10,000 not enough to get Mick Gatto a dinner date with the First Bloke

PRIME Minister Julia Gillard has banned Mick Gatto from lunch at The Lodge after he paid $10,000 for the privilege at a charity auction.

Mr Gatto said he had been looking forward to giving Ms Gillard some advice.

Advice is not the only thing Gatto was planning to give Gillard. Word on the street is that he was also planning to return the stolen cutlery.

Posted by Tony Tea on 27 August 2011 at 10:55 in Aussie Rules, Melbourne | Permalink | Comments (1)

BOOMER TISH

Footy Classified, Garry Lyon:

"North have built this side really well. They have been able to build this list on the back of some genuine bargains."

The graphic (there's always the graphic):

  • Michael Firrito - Rookie Draft
  • Scott McMahon - Rookie Draft
  • Leigh Adams - Rookie Draft
  • Matt Campbell - Rookie Draft
  • Nathan Grima - Rookie Draft
  • Cruize Garlett - Rookie Draft
  • Cam Pedersen - Rookie Draft
  • Aaron Mullett - Rookie Draft
  • Aaron Edwards - Pick 82 - 2006
  • Lindsay Thomas - Pick 53 - 2006
  • Brent Harvey - Pick 47 - 1995
  • Andrew Swallow - Pick 43 - 2005

Excuse my skepticism. The inclusion of Brent Harvey smacks of padding. "Look! Boomer was drafted at 47 - that will bolster our point." North built its 1990s list with Harvey. North already had Harvey when Dean Laidley re-built the list in the Noughties. Now, under Brad Scott, "this side" and "this list" merely inherited Harvey.

Posted by Tony Tea on 26 August 2011 at 12:05 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (2)

PLUS ÇA CHANGE, PLUS ÇA CHANGE, PLUS C'EST LA MÊME CHOSE

Someone is going to have to crack open a can of #FootyMaths to assist in the AFL's on-going struggle with unintended consequences.

Since the introduction of the current substitute rule, footy fans have been party to the following justification:

"The substitute rule works brilliantly. Late in games players are tiring dramatically, allowing the games to open right up."

Of late, conspiratorially as a distraction from GWS shenanigans and other inspired AFL hi-jinx, it has been mooted that the game is too long:

"At 30+ minutes, quarters are too long. Late in games players are tiring dramatically, putting their well-being and careers at risk."

In a nutshell: We can make the game better by making the players more tired; by making the players less tired, we can make the game better.

The AFL, through its rules committee, introduces a new rule or rule modification - "tweak", to employ the prevailing user-friendly vernacular. Mind you, Kevin Bartlett remains dogged (tiger-like, even) in his defence: "there are next to NO new rules." This change, in turn, precipitates another change, and another, etc, et al, and so on. Which is great for KB, who gets to oversee another tweak. See how it works?

Next step: two substitutes.

Posted by Tony Tea on 25 August 2011 at 09:45 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (3)

DUDD JUDD v SPUD BUDD?

I could not bring myself to hate Judd because he went to Carlton instead of Melbourne; he's just too bloody good. And anyway, recent events appear to illustrate why he might have chosen Royal Parade. That, and his cushy deal at Visy. I also wanted to mention that both Judd and Buddy barracked for Melbourne before they played AFL. And also that I had, coincidentally, had a multi on Collingwood for the flag, Judd for the Brownlow and Buddy for the Coleman.

THAT'S, or rather THIS! is what I am talking about!

Posted by Tony Tea on 19 August 2011 at 09:15 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (3)

YOUR AB

Austrian's wouldn't give a XXXX for "automated programming systems":

ABC pulls plug on VFL game

It was lights, cameras and suddenly no action for ABC viewers of Saturday's AFL match of the round between Port Melbourne and Williamstown.

With only a couple of minutes to go, at 4pm, Williamstown was five points down and storming home when the ABC pulled the plug on the live coverage.

It turned out there were only two minutes still to go in an extraordinarily long game, when the ABC announced that, unfortunately, it was ending its coverage and that the game could be seen later on the station's iView.

The station went to its next program - Treks in the Wild World: Trekking in Austria.

(From the Herald Sun's Sports Confidential.)

Posted by Tony Tea on 15 August 2011 at 09:05 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (2)

LOW WRENT

Collingwood, the club that Jack built, is proud to announce the appointment of a new powerbroker.

Posted by Tony Tea on 03 August 2011 at 10:05 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (8)

FAILURE TO LUNCH

Chris de Kretser & Daryl Timms in today's Herald Sun:

AFL rules bent to draft Jurrah

The persuasive power of former Collingwood player Rupert Betheras was instrumental in the AFL making an exception to its rules to enable Melbourne indigenous wizard Laim Jurrah to be drafted.

The revelation appears in a book on the Demon they call the Walpiri Warrior, which was launched by AFL chief Andrew Demetriou yesterday.

The Author Bruce Hearn Mackinnon, with whom Jurrah lived when he first came to the city and played four VFL games four Collingwood told how the AFL waived a couple of requirements for the 2009 pre-season draft.

Ignoring that Jurrah was taken in the 2008 pre-season draft - Jake Niall, March 19, 2009:

Red centre bounce: Jurrah makes a big leap in any language

[Jurrah] returned to Melbourne, but the Magpies, clearly mindful of the vast cultural distance Jurrah had to travel (Industrial Magpies supporters group member and Jurrah friend Bruce Hearn Mackinnon says Jurrah had never been in the ocean until a Collingwood recovery session), chose not to pursue him, and he did not even nominate for the national draft. Other clubs took a similarly risk-averse view, although he trained briefly with North Melbourne.

Former Collingwood grand final player Rupert Betheras intervened, lobbied the AFL and saw to it that Jurrah was permitted to nominate for the pre-season draft. While national draft nomination is normally mandatory for those picked in the pre-season draft, the AFL ruled that Jurrah had "exceptional circumstances" and admitted him.

Posted by Tony Tea on 28 July 2011 at 08:25 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (0)

TOP SHELF LIFE

What have the following players got in common?

  • Adam Thompson
  • Adrian Burdon
  • Alex Fasolo
  • Alex McDonald
  • Ben Allan
  • Brett Burton
  • Clayton Lamb
  • Clayton Lasscock
  • Daniel Menzel
  • Drew Banfield
  • Evan Hewitt
  • Harry Taylor
  • James Davies
  • Jared Brennan
  • Jason Gram
  • Jason McCartney
  • Lance Picioane
  • Llane Spaanderman
  • Matthew Laidlaw
  • Mitchell Brown
  • Peter Bubner
  • Robert Stevenson
  • Ryan Schoenmakers
  • Shane Crawford
  • Shane Sikora

All those players were selected with the first draft pick of that season's premier. For instance, Hawthorn won the flag in 1991 and selected Shane Crawford with their first pick in the 1991 (Insert sponsor:__________) National Draft.

Serious question: would a draftee be 98% happy to have been drafted by the flag holder. Would, and I am picking absolutely at random here, Adam Thompson have been chuffed to have been taken by Port with pick 11 in 2004? There is an outside chance he, like me, figured Port might have pinched the cup that year and the only way was down. True, he may have thought Port had the momentum to go further, but as Steve Coogan said in The Trip: "momentum is what you have when you go downhill." Port were good enough to make the grand final in 2007, you say. True. But that was an utter fluke, and in hindsight, Port probably wished they had dodged that bullet... howitzer shell.

Hawthorn in 1991. Like Melbourne in 1964, you could have be forgiven for thinking the Hawks had capped their dynasty with one last flag. And indeed, it took the Hawks another 17 modest years to win a flag. But Shane Crawford was good enough to last those 17 years to finally crown a pretty damn excellent career. If only it had taken the Demons a mere, microscopic 17 years to win their next flag. Sigh.

Or take Llane Spaanderman. To paraphrase Henny Youngman, take Llane Spaanderman, please. Taken by Brisbane with pick 18 in 2003, he have could certainly been forgiven for thinking a flag was a fair way off after the Lions had won the previous three premierships.

Adrian Burdon was taken by Carlton in 1995 at pick 61; presumably Carlton traded away their early picks. Burdon can hardly have expected to set the world on fire in the next couple of years, and in fact played no games for the Blues.

How many draftees, low level draftees in most cases, think they will be good enough to squeeze into a premiership side in their first season?

And yet, Ben Allan, Drew Banfield, Harry Taylor and Shane Crawford all played in premierships. Jason Gram, admittedly at another club, might have played in two. Jason McCartney was a fathead in the 1999 preliminary final, got suspended and missed North's premiership. Daniel Menzel and Alex Fasolo are both a chance to play in flags this year. As usual, I pose the questions, but have no idea what the answer might be. There may not even be an answer, conclusion or #FootyMaths extrapolation. Someone else can compare this list with the same season's wooden-spooner, I've got work to do.

Posted by Tony Tea on 27 July 2011 at 10:20 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (3)

KNOW SHIT!

Tell us something we don't no:

AFL players struggle with reading and maths, the AFLPA reveals

A QUARTER of all players who come into the AFL system have reading and maths skills lower than year 10 level.

In the following item on the SEN 7:30 News, Barry Hall didn't know the meaning of "prior".

Posted by Tony Tea on 20 July 2011 at 08:40 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (15)

CROWDY DOODY

Jon Pierik, The Age:

On a delightful winter's afternoon, in front of the second largest home-and-away crowd between the clubs, the Demons proved that could well be the case with a 27-point win in a game marred by several questionable umpiring decisions. (link)

Michael Horan, The Herald Sun:

So it was that in front of 61,000 fans - the third largest home and away crowd for a game between these two clubs - Melbourne is back in the eight and Richmond's chance is gone for now. (offline)

Posted by Tony Tea on 26 June 2011 at 11:45 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (2)

THE HUMAN LIGHTWEIGHT

If Derryn Hinch was the hard core Demon supporter he claimed to once be, there is no way in the known world he would have mistaken Jim Stynes running over the mark in the 1987 preliminary final at Waverley, with Jim Stynes running over the mark in the 1987 preliminary final at the MCG:

Banishing my Demons

Was back at the MCG with Ron Walker the day Jim Stynes ran across the mark and incurred the 15-yard penalty from which Buckenara scored and we missed out on the grand final.

Niggled? Didn't check?

HumanHeadline Derryn Hinch

@Jesse_Hogan Correct. Niggled me when writing. Didn't check. I remember Pat Cash abused me for no reason.

What real Melbourne fan needs to check that?

Posted by Tony Tea on 20 June 2011 at 10:50 in Aussie Rules, Radio | Permalink | Comments (20)

THE SLAPRUDER FILM

The post below and the heading/picture combo at left have more than a passing acquaintance with each other - viz: The Irrational, clause 1, sub-clause i. - but really, I just wanted to use the heading.

Chuck Klosterman's article at Grantland is a top read, but should be a must-read for any TV executive in Australia:

Space, Time and DVR Mechanics

When it's come to sports, it's live ... or it's totally dead

Why is watching a prerecorded sporting event less pleasurable than watching the same game live?

It doesn't matter how much I sequester myself or how thrilling the event is — if I know the game has finished, it's difficult to sustain authentic interest in what I've recorded.

It is different when you support one of the teams in the recorded match. And here in Australia - especially Western Australia where the blackout has been an item of faith since at least 1987 when Wet Toast joined the then VFL - we have become inured to the concept of delayed telecasts by cynical Official Broadcasters all-too keen to bilk their viewers to maximise their revenue streams. What is undeniable, though, is that often on Friday Night Football I check the score at half time, then go to bed.

Posted by Tony Tea on 17 June 2011 at 15:15 in Aussie Rules, Sport | Permalink | Comments (8)

YOU WOULDN'T HAVE WON IF WE OUT-BEAT YOU

Will Steve Johnson become the next Casey Stengel or Yogi Berra?

"We cannot rest on our morals."

~~ Steve receives the 2007 Norm Smith Medal

"Early on they out-beat us at every contest."

~~ Steve after last weekend's game against the Gold Coast Schoolies

Posted by Tony Tea on 01 June 2011 at 13:50 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (0)

GEELONG GOODBYE

I was genuinely saddened to hear about the death of Bob Davis, but the slow motion tributes garnished with saccharine pop-tart soundtrack slop would not do justice to the premature break-up of a boy band, let alone the melancholy demise of an old fashioned Aussie rules character like Bobby.

Elsewhere, Ashley Browne at BPL:

It was in the early 1990s on Sportsworld, the Sunday morning TV show that replaced World of Sport, that Davis paid out on a typically poor performance by the then Brisbane Bears.

When challenged by a fellow panelist to "name names", Davis promptly did, pulling out his copy of the AFL Record from the day before and verbally drawing a line through pretty much every member of the Brisbane side. Among the gems that day, were: "David Bain... too small.... Brad Hardie ... too loose... Roger Merrett... too old... Richard Champion...in name only"

AB left out the "catch a tram" part, probably because he, like me, could never work out what it meant.

Not that I am interested in nitpicking Ashley Browne. I am far more interested in nitpicking purveyors of Fractured Flashbacks. Repeatedly over the last couple of days I have heard commentators announce they saw the above performance on League Teams. Gerard Healy last night on 3AW: "I will never forget seeing that on League Teams." Or words to that effect.

There is every chance Healy did indeed see Bobby bag the Bears, but it would not have been on League Teams.

Once again we witness a virulent outbreak of OPMS (Other People's Memory Syndrome). Maybe not in Healy's case who worked for Seven and has probably seen the footage (although "I'll never forget" followed by the wrong fact is always highly suss), but certainly in the case of many other pundits and non-pundits who, keen to join the moment, blurt out something they have heard second hand, or second ear, as the case may be.

Posted by Tony Tea on 19 May 2011 at 10:55 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (5)

THE BILIAD

A one billion dollar Trojan horse is how Greg "Aeneas" Baum describes the TV rights deal in his excellent article in today's Age:

The Trojan horse has bolted

THE Trojan horse is through the gates now. The red carpet was rolled out for it. For two days, the people have danced around it, chortling to each other about what a glorious beast it is. ''One billion dollars,'' they exclaim, as if the words themselves are some sort of magic formula, certainly not to be lampooned, like that other popular mantra of the day, ''William and Kate''. The new television deal is the AFL's royal wedding.

[...]

Media become shy on this topic because many in the industry have television deals, free-to-air and pay, and the rest claim their subscriptions on tax. I'm as guilty as any.

[...]

Even as AFL fans coo and fawn over this horse parading so splendidly before them, perhaps one of them should take a moment to look it in the mouth.

"Be careful what you wish for."

Posted by Tony Tea on 30 April 2011 at 12:05 in Aussie Rules, Television | Permalink | Comments (5)

LOOK BACK IN CLANGER

Posted this on March 17, but given the number of times I have had to refer to it in the last month I thought I may as well post it here for easy reference:

The Demons have several problems. A couple, which you mention, are the transition and the youth/experience. The Dees' footy department have taken a major gamble by letting Bruce & McDonald go. They are banking on the young blokes coming through with an eye to next year (not 2011), but if Melbourne struggle to get their hands on the footy this season this will be held up as a root cause and the natives will get mighty restless. With that in mind it has been interseting to see Bailey & Schwab quietly massage Melbourne fans' expectations downwards. Another issue, which Gerard Healy & Mark Stevens mentioned, is the ability of good sides to pick apart the Demon defence. The way Essendon did it is similar to what Geelong (both with Thompson in the coaches box; and now three weeks ago with Sean Wellman providing inside oil) used to do: that is, spot up short targets in space just inside the 50, which is similar to a basketball team opening up the keyway by hitting threes. Draw opponents up the ground and you open spaces in behind.

My personal concern is size & aggression. Ever since John Northey left Melbourne have played "pretty" footy when they are on, but have not looked like winning when they are off. Why are they off? Because opposition coaches man up on Melbourne and force them into mistakes. Melbourne have barely won a match in the last 19 seasons where the other side has also played well. This is because Melbourne have lacked grunt under Bailey, Daniher, Balme & the two stand-in coaches. Until Melbourne realise that footy is about big blokes knocking over big blokes they will continue to struggle in big matches, simply because the opposition will knock them off the footy, block their running lines, scrag them into places where the footy doesn't go. This is why there will be games this year where Melbourne cannot get their hands on the footy at clearances because they will get muscled off the ball. Melbourne, despite Jones and Moloney's undoubted strength (McKenzie is important but might have OP and Gyzberts has not played enough footy) will sometimes get belted in close.

Malthouse, Sheedy, Roos & Matthews all understand that footy is a contact sport and that the biggest baddest sides usually win big matches. Go back through the years and you will almost universally find that the teams that win premierships do so on the back of big players, a solid defence and fierce man on man aggression. Northey knew that, Balme and Daniher never really embraced it, now it is up to Curley Bailey to instill in his players big game winning grunt.

Posted by Tony Tea on 29 April 2011 at 16:05 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (1)

REGAL EYED

Julia Gillard thought she would spring a surprise on Prince Charles by giving him a Mansfield Eagles football jumper because Charles had gone to Timbertop, a Geelong Grammar campus, which is near Mansfield:

Prince Charles given Mansfield Eagles footy jumper as gift after late dash involving Julia Gillard

THE Mansfield Football Club has made Prince Charles its number one ticket holder after Prime Minister Julia Gillard presented the Prince with a Mansfield Eagles jumper after a last-minute race to get it to London.

Upon hearing this on 3AW this morning, I put out a tweet to Mansfield Footy Club:

@MansfieldEagles Serious question. Were the Mansfield Eagles ever called the Mansfield Demons?

Channel Ten reporter Roger Oldridge replied:

@AfterGrogBlog @mansfieldeagles changed from demons in 1998 when they entered the GVFL. Shepp united were already the Demons

Thanks, Roger.

Even if Charles remembered there was such a thing as the Mansfield football club (he attended Timbertop for eight months in 1966) he would not remember the blue & gold jumper since Mansfield used to be the Mansfield Demons and wore the red & blue jumpers of Melbourne.

Gillard should have given, well, panic-rushed around the world to Charles a Mansfield Demons jumper, although Charlie was probably comfortable receiving an Eagles jumper on the same day that the Eagles pumped the Demons at Subiaco.

Posted by Tony Tea on 29 April 2011 at 13:25 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (2)

BILL' OF RIGHTS

Hats off to Andrew Demetriou who "twisted David Leckie's arm" for live footy, and still gouged the networks for more than one billion dollars for the AFL rights:

AFL rights bonanza announced

The AFL has announced its massive broadcast rights deals, to reap over $1.253 billion for the nation's leading sport organisation over the five years from 2011-2016.

Posted by Tony Tea on 28 April 2011 at 15:55 in Aussie Rules, Television | Permalink | Comments (3)

RACKET CREEP

When I first got Foxtel back in January 2000 programs generally had just one ad break per hour consisting of promotions for other Foxtel programs; for instance, were you watching the Simpsons, you would get an ad for the History Channel, a sport and The Simpsons. Several years later the ad frequency had increased to every 15 minutes. Now the ads appear roughly every 11 minutes and are full blown "retail opportunities" as Martin Brundell was wont to say when it was time to interrupt the grand prix. Try an experiment: flick around your Foxtel channels and see how often you lob on a station when there is an ad on. This happens for two reasons: one) there are more ads, derrr; and two) Foxtel subsidiaries puts ads on differrent channels at the same time to stop you flicking, just like the FTA stations.

Obviously the ads increased as Foxtel sought to pay for increased programming costs as it purchased more product. It was also loss leading. Foxtel was prepared to drop money as it tried to attract subscribers to cable television just like a drug dealer tempting a potential junky. "Go on, try it. A little taste won't hurt."

Foxtel is now set to shell more than half a billion dollars for the rights to just about all the footy. Where does it find this enormous chunk of change if it is not able to increase subscriber numbers? (It would be interesting to know how many new subscribers signed up for Foxtel when it had the footy from 2002 to 2006.) Stands to reason they will have to increase their advertising revenue. Betting promotion will increase. Cross promotion, too. There will also, no doubt, be an add-on cost for subscribers to access the Footy Channel. And then there are Foxtel's disguised ads: the pre-match half hour filler.

It is already mooted Foxtel will have ads during play for the four matches per round they will simulcast with Seven, while it is unlikely they will have ads for the other (soon to be) five games. The way Fox handles this twin coverage will also be interesting;  how will the simulcast matches with ads compare with the straight to Fox matches without ads. With the aid of an imaginative mind, that dichotomy prompts another question: will Foxtel ever have ads on their non-simulcast matches?

Rohan Connolly, be careful what you wish for:

Football on TV, you get what you pay for

Seven, and to a lesser extent Ten's, coverage of AFL today reminds me more than a little of the current political climate in Canberra. Trying so hard to be all things to all people that they end up standing for little and not pleasing anyone much.

That's Foxtel's advantage. It knows its market is serious hardcore football fans, and caters accordingly. Though, it has to be said, the sort of things for which we're now grateful should be a given for any network.

Like live coverage of games, for starters. Like no advertising breaks after every goal, so you can actually see the score replayed and analysed by the special comments men. Like panel shows that actually talk about football and not themselves.

I'll have to pay. But at least I'll get to see what I should, and know that I'm watching it on a station that appears to genuinely love the game as much as I do, not just as a potential ratings boost for its other programs.

Foxtel has always provided solid footy coverage. They don't have any great commentators (the pool of commentary talent is depressingly shallow), they don't employ any whizz-bang effects, but, as Rohan says, Foxtel treats footy as the main event, not the garnishing. Whether it stays that way is another matter.

All that and I have not mentioned sports viewers' least favourite two words: 1) official; and 2) broadcaster.

Posted by Tony Tea on 28 April 2011 at 12:05 in Aussie Rules, Television | Permalink | Comments (7)

PIES & MOLLS

In tune with the zeitgeist - a musical about sport, gambling and criminals:

Magpies musical on the way

COLLINGWOOD is on song, or soon will be, with Magpies - The Musical well under way.

Killer fact! Collingwood have won 13 of their 15 premierships illegally courtesy of Jack Wren's criminal gambling empire.

Posted by Tony Tea on 14 April 2011 at 07:55 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (10)

LARVATUS PRODIT

"He's been doing it all day! Well, since March."

Posted by Tony Tea on 13 April 2011 at 15:15 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (1)

LOSS BLEEDER

If TV networks made more money from running AFL matches live rather than on delay, they would already do it. In reality, AFL broadcasters bleed money so as to attract viewers to their other rubbish:

Channel 7 to lose $400,000 a weekend with live footy

A LEADING media analyst believes Channel 7 would be sacrificing up to $400,000 in advertising revenue a weekend if forced to show football live. Fusion Strategy managing director Steve Allen said Seven can make as much as $20,000 from each extra minute of advertising in its delayed football coverage.

When forced to show games live it cannot squeeze extra ads into the telecast between goals.

"The difference between Better Homes and Gardens and the AFL is that Better Homes is profitable and the AFL is not.

Networks such as Seven and Ten consistently lose money on their football telecasts, but being a football network helps with cross promotion and general ratings appeal.

Posted by Tony Tea on 07 April 2011 at 09:50 in Aussie Rules, Television | Permalink | Comments (6)

BARE-FACED LIVE

When I first read the following article I thought "pushed back 10 minutes" meant the Seven telecast would be delayed by ten minutes, which is not exactly live, and which would have been a monumental piece of skullduggery. But then I realised it meant the games themselves were to be pushed back 10 minutes, which apparently is a piece of skullduggery - at least according to Caro:

AFL's $1bn rights deal

FRIDAY night football would be televised live every week for the first time and pay TV operator Foxtel would get to show finals live under a landmark $1 billion deal being negotiated between the big networks and the AFL.

As the deal moves towards its ambitious $1 billion price tag, it has emerged that Seven is close to a compromise with the league to make all Friday night telecasts live - in return for match starting times being pushed back 10 minutes.

In what could prove to be a controversial change among fans who attend matches - particularly families with young children - Friday games would be shifted from their current 7.40pm start to 7.50pm.

Andy Dollars & his three amigos will have done a sensational job if they manage to get the TV networks to go live as well as cough up the famous billion dollars.

Still, the ink is not yet dry. It remains to be seen whether Friday Night Footy is absolutely live as opposed to almost live. There's always The Delay. The TV stations will not want to lose listeners to the radio broadcasts, so a little time-shift tweaking is likely to happen as the TV network tries to scramble the radio & picture feeds. If you don't want to listen to the ads, you can always investigate the effectiveness of a delay-o-tron or IQ it.

Posted by Tony Tea on 06 April 2011 at 14:35 in Aussie Rules, Radio, Television | Permalink | Comments (17)

DR. RICHARDSON, I PRESUME

If you saw the highlights of last night's Richmond -v- St Kilda match you would have seen Jack Riewoldt smack his head into the deck, get up with jelly legs, be assisted from the field, shamble down the race to see the doctors for a concussion test, then re-emerge to crack the shits at the Tiger medical staff for not letting him return to play.

Whether Jack's tantrum was warranted is worthy of debate. Should he have carried on like a pork chop? Should he have sucked it up and accepted the medical verdict? How bad was his concussion? Could he have continued to play without impairment? How much residual damage is he likely to incur, if any? Was he in fact fine and cracking the shits with a clear head as he thought the medical staff were over-reacting? Was he totally addled to the point where he was oblivious to his dummy-spit? All fair questions which could have been debated on the 3AW pre-match when they discussed last night's match. Instead Matty Richardson jumped in with an alacrity that suggests he may have been previously worded up by the Tigers. I paraphrase:

"Jack's reaction was understandable in the circumstances, since emotional and angry responses are classic symptoms of concussion."

This was followed by a blithe acceptance from the other members of the AW footy panel and the debate ended right there. Richo, Riewoldt's friend and former team-mate, had neatly shut down the discussion via a statement of fact.

Now, I am no doctor, so following Dr. Richo's diagnosis I sought a second opinion from my local internet. Signs and symptoms of a concussion may include:

  • Headache or a feeling of pressure in the head
  • Temporary loss of consciousness
  • Confusion or feeling as if in a fog
  • Amnesia surrounding the traumatic event
  • Dizziness or "seeing stars"
  • Ringing in the ears
  • Nausea or vomiting
  • Slurred speech
  • Fatigue

That list was from the Mayo Clinic and several other sites failed to list "emotional and angry responses" as classic symptoms of concussion.

That is not to reject Richo's medical expertise. One site listed irritability as a symptom, while Wikipedia mentions "crankiness" and "displays of emotion that are inappropriate to the situation."

But at least one question came immediately to mind: how often have you seen players blowing up after copping a concussion?

Posted by Tony Tea on 02 April 2011 at 21:10 in Aussie Rules, Radio | Permalink | Comments (27)

FIVE YEARS (MY BRAIN HURTS A LOT)

The new footy five year rights package has been disconfounding the footy media. Jon Ralph, belatedly, gets with the programming:

Why won't the AFL guarantee live football next year?

How much money is the AFL prepared to sacrifice if Seven says it will broadcast Friday nights, but only on delay?

Andrew Demetriou says his personal view is that live football is necessary for modern TV viewers.

Time to turn that personal view into the AFL's stated policy, even if it costs the league a few extra dollars.

Belatedly? Welcome to the pleasure dumb:

She'll Be Rights

The AFL are, allegedly, looking to push the price for the TV rights from $750 million to $1 billion. Currently marquee games are on delay: Friday night, Saturday night and Sunday. Yet the AFL want an extra $250 million as well as have the TV stations alter their current programming to run the matches live. Does this not smack of cake and eat it, too? Can the TV stations make up the extra dosh by moving from delayed to live broadcasts?

(Hats off, Leapster.)

Posted by Tony Tea on 01 April 2011 at 08:55 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (0)

OVAL OFFICE

Posted by Tony Tea on 10 March 2011 at 12:41 in Aussie Rules, Politics | Permalink | Comments (20)

NON SOQUITUR

A caller to SEN explains why Casey - and by extension, Melbourne - should recruit Brendan Fevola:

"You've got to walk the walk so you can talk the talk so the proof is in the pudding."

Posted by Tony Tea on 08 March 2011 at 10:20 in Aussie Rules, Radio | Permalink | Comments (6)

RIGHTS ON THE MONEY!

Last year on July 29, a wise person wrote:

SHE'LL BE RIGHTS

The AFL are, allegedly, looking to push the price for the TV rights from $750 million to $1 billion. Currently marquee games are on delay: Friday night, Saturday night and Sunday. Yet the AFL want an extra $250 million as well as have the TV stations alter their current programming to run the matches live. Does this not smack of cake and eat it, too?

Can the TV stations make up the extra dosh by moving from delayed to live broadcasts? Do the TV stations want the football enough to push the price out to $1 billion?

do the TV stations run games on delay purely to fit into their schedules? Channel Seven go on about viewer loyalty of Better Homes & Gardens, but do they really care that much about the BH&G income stream? Could running big games on delay means they can better pad their coverage? Surely, they would want to avoid having viewers turn off the sound and listen to the radio. Yes, there is the delay, but technology such as the Delay-o-Tron allows viewers to synchronise the sound and picture.

Up until now, the AFL have been unwilling to force TV stations to cough up more money and run all matches live. Belatedly, after the last contract negotiations were complete, the punters realised that, yet again, Friday night live was somehow left out of the agreement. Instead we were informed that Friday night matches were supposedly covered by and article of faith, a "discretionary" agreement, whereby the AFL crossed their fingers and hoped that maybe the TV stations would do the right thing by the viewers and show a match live if the match warranted the live treatment. For an extra $250 million, is this likely to change?

Today in the Herald Sun, Michael Warner (who really should have consulted the AGB, but instead consulted rent-a-quote footy oaf, Joffa):

Friday footy set to remain on delay as Channel 7 stands firm

FOOTY fans face another five years of delayed Friday night TV broadcasts.

As the AFL closes in on a new TV rights deal expected to top $1 billion, Channel 7 is refusing to give in to pressure to sacrifice top-rating Better Homes & Gardens and show footy live.

Also today in the Herald Sun, Mike Sheahan:

AFL needs to sweeten next TV deal if it wants to go live on Friday night

OF course the Seven network wants to preserve and extend the status quo.

Why would a network, any network, want to tamper in any way with an arrangement that guarantees fours hours of high-rating, prime-time television on Friday nights for the best part of 30 weeks?

No, if we are finally to get live football on Friday night every week, the AFL is going to have to concede a slice of the rights generated by the Friday night component.

Posted by Tony Tea on 24 February 2011 at 10:25 in Aussie Rules, Television | Permalink | Comments (14)

OFF: HIRD; ON: ROOS

What are the Key Selection Criteria for an effective football special comments commentator? Identify game trends? Pick apart tactics? Predict what might happen? Simple language, good timing, clear communication skills? It's not asking for much, is it? Or is it? Has there ever been a special comments commentator who, during the course of play, has been able to consistently describe the game along those simple lines? Most tell you superfluous stats, what you already know, what you've just seen, the bleedin' obvious. Many talk rubbish. Many talk rubbish and have their on air partners chime in with their own rubbish like "Blighty, you genius" and "you said it, Leigh" and "You have done your research, Tom." Well, I guess they are trying to sell their product.

Nathan Buckley was excellent, but Paul Roos, judging by his laconic demeanour, clear communication and obvious understanding of the caper may well go closest to meeting all the commentator KSCs. Not that the bar is raised particularly high, or to put it in the modern commentarial parlance, not that the vertical augmentation appliance is elevated to a satisfactory altitude:

Paul Roos to call game as it is in special comments role for Fox Sports

PAUL Roos says too many AFL commentators fail to do their research and simply tell viewers how they believe the game should be played.

The former Sydney coach is the star signing for Fox Sports, where he will give special comments and appear on review show On The Couch.

But Roos says he is determined to call the game as it is, rather than how he would like it to be played. He believes it is too easy for former players and coaches out of touch with the game to influence the views of the supporters.

I would love to see Bruce McAvaney (a true pro; used to gush; was over-exposed; got the balance right; discovered his sense of humour, probably because he is working with Dennis Cometti), Dennis Cometti (easily the best in the business) and Paul Roos do the Friday night matches.

Posted by Tony Tea on 18 February 2011 at 11:35 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (15)

ROGER, WILLCOPY

What happens when you lack the facts to fatten a story? You go and get them:

Herald Hun: Bomber star Merrett suffers stroke

well known for his fierce, hard attack on the ball and his dashing moustache. He struck fear into the hearts of opposition players over a long career.

He is considered by many as the greatest Brisbane Bear in the club's short history. He used his height and kicking abilities to spearhead the club as their leading goalkicker for many seasons before Alastair Lynch proved a suitable replacement.

Wikipedia: Roger Merrett

Well known for his fierce, hard attack on the ball and his dashing moustache, he struck fear into the hearts of opposition players over a long career. He is considered by many as the greatest Brisbane Bear in the club's short history.

he was able to use his height and kicking abilities to spearhead the club as their leading goalkicker for many seasons before Alastair Lynch proved a suitable replacement.

Surely you mix it up, cover your tracks, not just cut and paste. I'm tipping the "greatest Brisbane Bear" gave it away. (Right, Biggy?) And the "dashing moustache" lacks oomph under a picture of Merrett without a moustache.

Posted by Tony Tea on 01 February 2011 at 15:25 in Aussie Rules | Permalink | Comments (25)

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