PLAYING THE PERCENTAGES

The latest Aussie Rules research from Roy Morgan. Yawn. The AGB has done its own research.

Adelaide Crows supporters are:

• 490% more likely to think KG & Cornsey are adults

Brisbane Lions supporters are:

• 276% more likely to think Kevin Murray is a river

Carlton Blues supporters are:

• 221% more likely to have participated in white collar crime

Collingwood Magpies supporters are:

• 332% more likely to eat through a straw

Essedon Bombers supporters are:

• 167% more likely to have inherited a speech impediment

Fremantle Dockers supporters are:

• 304% more likely to celebrate too hard, too early

Geelong Cats supporters are:

• 245% more likely to be retrenched by Ford in the next 4 years

Hawthorn Hawks supporters are:

• 145% more likely to have been kicked out of a nightclub

Melbourne Demons supporters are:

• The best

North Melbourne Kangaroos supporters are:

• 148% more likely to have sold their holiday shack on the Gold Coast

Port Adelaide Power supporters are:

• 396% more likely to have received stolen goods

Richmond Tigers supporters are:

• 162% more likely to have children named after soap stars

St Kilda Saints supporters are:

• 397% more likely to over-rate their chances

Sydney Swans supporters are:

• 498% more likely to have danced and sung along to Kylie Minogue

West Coast Eagles supporters are:

• 286% more likely to think this statistic will be about drugs

Western Bulldogs supporters are:

• I couldn't find any

Comments

[RT]

Roy must be related to Val. Nod off while reading.

Can't find fault in your research, TT.

[RT]

Although Pies supporters 332% more likely to eat straw (than eat thru one).

[keri]

I'm and Esssssendon Sup sup supporter and I've got no speeech problems at all at all

[Tadpole]

Tony, long time lurker, first time contributor.

Ex-pat Melb living in Syd and a NMFC man from way back. I've never had a shack on the Gold Coast (gold toast?)... Spot on with the Bloods supporters up here though.

Best post I've seen so far. Love your work.

[Random]

Melbourne supporters are several per cent more likely to be unable to spell Essendon. Also there are five other people in my workplace, three of them are doggies supporters. Two of those are Kiwis. Make of that what you will.

[Tony T.]

Keri: You're write.

Tad: Thanks for that.

Random: 'Bout time someone spotted my finely honed "gag". Essedon supporters traditionally leave out the n. (And their cheer squad once spelled it Bombres, but not in a Spanish way.)

[John Ryan]

456% of the Melbourne Media believe anything the AFL tells them,and just lately they have been telling some whoppers

[Tony T]

But they are rigorously investigated, statistically accredited, crossed I, dotted T, Adrian Anderson endorsed whoppers, John, so it's OK.

[Lad Litter]

Have a go at Bombre fans at your peril, Tone. There are so many Carlton supporters living locally these days there's not a suburb nearby that doesn't have its pronunciation mangled: Kei-LORE; As-COT Vale.

Why don't you all f-f-fade away? Don't try and dig what we all s-s-say.

[Tony T]

I dig what you're saying: "Talking 'bout my re-generation." It's a very Melbourne/Essendon term these days.