A tram driver was "distracted" by two teenagers having sex in a "stupid position".
Crash blamed on sex
A tram driver has beaten a charge of careless driving after a magistrate heard he was distracted by passengers having sex.
Samy Metry, 53, crashed into the back of a stationary car because he was shocked and surprised by a teenage couple "hard at it" in a "stupid position" in the otherwise empty tram.
Distracted? More like he was having a right old perve while trying not to get sprung.
Someone at the Herald Sun must think so, too, if you compare the paper excerpt above with the archive excerpt below.
Driver gets off
A TRAM driver has beaten a charge of careless driving after a magistrate heard he was distracted by passengers having sex.
Samy Metry, 53, crashed into the back of a stationary car because he was shocked and surprised by a teenage couple "hard at it" in a "stupid position" in the otherwise empty tram.
Well if they remembered to validate their ticket, there's no problem, surely?
Posted by: TimT | 21 September 2007 at 11:34
Depends on which zone.
Posted by: Tony T. | 21 September 2007 at 11:38
Depending on which way you look at* it all positions in sex are stupid or no position for sex could possibly be stupid. Except if you are not in the position to get any sex.
* and the driver was looking at it in the rear view mirror
Posted by: Francis Xavier Holden | 21 September 2007 at 12:37
* and the driver was leering at it in the rear view mirror.
Just like in so many movies. Substitute tram driver for taxi driver and have the girl-sexer sneer "What are you looking at?"
Posted by: Tony T. | 21 September 2007 at 12:45
Very good. Carry on Tony.
Posted by: Scott Wickstein | 21 September 2007 at 13:29
Stupid sex position: each person puts left hand between own legs, under right knee, and raises hand to head, placing index finger in right ear. They then have sex.
Posted by: Laura | 21 September 2007 at 13:43
Laura - what number tram is that one?
Posted by: Francis Xavier Holden | 21 September 2007 at 18:10
Well, I don't know my tram roots like I used to, but it's not the one that went up Glenferrie Road.
Posted by: Tony T. | 21 September 2007 at 18:54
Coming soon to a cinema near you!
TRAM DRIVER
A film set in the mean streets of Melbourne City... the story of a man who went to the wrong side of the Tram Tracks - and stayed there.
"Each night when I return the tram to the depot, I have to clean the cum off the back seat. Some nights, I clean off the blood."
Posted by: TimT | 21 September 2007 at 21:07
Usually it's headjobs on the #86. This is a step up.
Posted by: Adam 1.0 | 22 September 2007 at 10:51
10 songs for "The Party before the Storm":
1) The Sick Bed Of Cameron Smith - The Pogues
2) Melbourne Kiss the Dirt - INXS
3) Hey St. Nathan - Flash and the Hindmarsh
4) Should I defend or score a try? - The Clashing Eels
5) Just Cant Pass the ball Enough (to Jarryd Hayne) - Depeche Mode
6) Just Keep Walking Melbourne - INXS of Parra penalties
7) Making Plans for Cooper Cronk - Victory is XTC
8) Chase the Wagon - Beasts of Bourbon
9) Crocker, Fui Fui Moi Moi! - TISM
10) It a week off to laugh, a Grand Final missed to cry - Bob "Hagan" Dylan
Posted by: pat | 22 September 2007 at 18:47
Damn, "It TAKES a week off to laugh, a Grand Final missed to cry - Bob "Hagan" Dylan"
Posted by: pat | 22 September 2007 at 18:50
At half time, the conclusion is that neither of these teams can win the GF. What a shit and woeful game. Whoever wins tomorrow gets the Provan Summons.
Posted by: pat | 22 September 2007 at 20:48
At full time, it remains the same. The gayest game of the year. The Storm or the Eels. Whoever wins tomorrow wins the GF.
Posted by: pat | 22 September 2007 at 22:19
I reckon both the Eels and Seagles have what it takes to beat the Storm.
Posted by: Tony T. | 23 September 2007 at 16:50
Anyone done any Siemens Combino jokes yet?
Posted by: Big Ramifications | 24 September 2007 at 13:54
Well done to the Storm. They've been the best team all year and, deserve (I suppose) to get their go this Sunday.
I thought Parra played a blinder but just couldn't get that final kick or pass going on the 6th tackle at crucial times. The Storm did.
Even though the luck of the bounce, ref calls not to mention Billy on the Video went against Parra they pushed the Storm all the way. A great final. Probably the best of the series. Tahu was brilliant and both sets of forwards pounded each other to a standstill. Great stuff.
Billy certainly has a fine eye if not great predictive powers. A tackled Warrior 7 metres out would have scored, he can see a stud touching the touch line where no one else can, and can see that a dropped ball over the line probably should be given the benefit of the doubt. I've promised myself not to swear on your blog so I'll leave it at that.
Don't know who to go for next Sunday. Probably the Storm as there still is a very small man inside me that hates Manly. Though not as much as the Bulldogs. Go Storm!
Posted by: pat | 24 September 2007 at 23:13
Biggy: They have now. Good work.
Pat: Melbourne were pretty lucky with at least two key decisions (toe on the line, dropped ball) and I still reckon they're vulnerable to sustained pressure (yeah, who isn't). But if Manly give them a sniff, they'll romp home. Will be interesting to see how Orford controls Manly's tempo. If his kicking game's off and Melbourne are allowed to get consistently good field possy they will be in trouble. And I reckon Melbourne like to play millionaire footy and if their passing game gets too ambitious at the wrong times, they'll give up easy points and lose.
Still, IT IS Manly, they moneybags pigs.
Posted by: Tony T. | 25 September 2007 at 17:22