BEGRUDGE MATCH

I'm sick of the hoopla that accompanies every Australia loss. You'd think we're invincible. No one wins every game, and the more games we play, the more likely it is we'll lose. Especially in a tin-pot tourney like the ICC World Twenty20, which incidentally, is not the Twenty20 World Cup.

There is a feeling that Australia had this coming. Their attitude towards Twenty20 has verged on the indifferent from the format's very inception, and at the end Ricky Ponting tellingly said "we've got to start respecting the game a bit more." He admitted he was embarrassed by the result adding that there "would be many Australians back home feeling the same way."

While Straya being beaten by Zimbabwe is an upset that is mildly upsetting, it is also a surprise that is not very surprising. The shorter you make the game, the more likely an upset becomes. Think about football. How often is the lesser team in front or "on the pace" at quarter time, only to get blown away once the favourite gets into stride. Chuck in a shit pitch (not, of itself, a bad thing), rock all practice, overcast conditions, the Zims doing everything right and our reluctance to even be there - it's batslotto.

Be interesting to see how a grouchy, stuck-in-the-mud Spanky writes it up given he shitcanned the tournament today:

Cricket's slogfest fails to hit the heights

ONLY stick-in-the-muds were unable to enjoy cricket's first multi-national staging of a frenzied game. Only grumps did not cheer as the ball was belted to every corner of a famous arena.

Only grouches did not appreciate the flashing lights, blaring music, fireworks, skimpily clad dancers and slogs laid before a heaving and cosmopolitan crowd. On another balmy African evening, thousands upon thousands feasted upon a brazen display of batsmanship.

Many wore red miners' hats, although not, surprisingly, matching red noses. They all looked distressingly happy.

And yet it was, in many respects, awful.

Comments

[Em]

Its the tall poppy syndrome. Everybody wants to bring the smartarse down. You'll read about this for weeks. Being an aussie fan must be like being a weagles fan because you would expect them to smash every game,every game they loose would be a one they were expected to win. You'll never get that satisfaction of unexpected victory.

[Tony T.]

I reckon you've got something there, Em.

But hopefully we won't soon start savouring unexpected upset victories. That would be like returning to the Eighties.

[Scott Wickstein]

Never mind the games, or the losing, what about the uniforms they are wearing? Ghastly. I'd want to lose wearing that outfit too!

[Professor Rosseforp]

I'm surprised that anyone cares enough to notice that Australia lost. Without casting aspersions as the Australians, if Pakistan lost to Zimbabwe in the final, would we be crying out for an investigation into gambling on the event?
Incidentally, speaking of irrelevant cricketing fixtures designed to speed up the game, can anyone remember the old single wicket competitions which were popular in the late 60s-early 70s? They are about ready for a comeback, as are the 19th century novelty games such as "Left-handers vs right-handers", "One-arms vs one-legs". I would love to see a team of all-rounders play against a team of wicket-keepers -- either that or a decent tourney of vigoro.

[nick]

Twenty20 will keep the plebs happy, and inject some more cash into the game. What did I think? Entertainment value - low. 40 overs bowled in 2 hours 40 minutes - with no no balls. Good fielding - by Zim. Further denigration of the art of bowling.

I thought the best quotes of the night were from Chappelli, 'bowlers might have to start chucking', and Gilly (in the post Pak vs Scot) commentating on the one dayer 'Say 4 for 60 Gilly...','Australia right on top, England struggling, like they have all summer, Australia 4 for 60'. Gold.

[13th Man]

Well, everyone's said it already - who really cares? I forgot we were playing last night. Whilst it is annoying to be beaten by Zim, it's not like it was real cricket. I know that just sounds like sour grapes, but Straya is top in the two forms of the game where it counts (real and one-day cricket). 20-20 is all about entertaining the plebs and levelling the playing field - and surely the latter is just wrong. Why would a top team want to level the field? Surely the lesser sides should rise to our level - not rely on the introduction of a variant where a school side could jag a win on the day? This variant will be beloved of shit sides like the poms, who can't play the real game - so they'll concentrate on this and talk it up in an effort to give it some credibility. Fact is: you don't want a contest where anyone can win - you want one where the best wins.
Heaven help the rest of the world if we ever do start to take it seriously, but frankly, I hope we never do. That'd be the message to send: Straya top in Test and 50's, clearly not giving a rat's about 20-20. I suspect we were contractually compelled to attend this joke tournament, but I wish we'd refused to go.

[Vindicate]

I watched it, until rain stopped play and I figured our lads would get emselves together long enough to offsee these upstarts, who, amazingly didn't drop a catch, didn't miss a stumping, and bowled more or less respectably.

Credit where it's due lads, Zim did emselves proud.

If they beat us smack in the middle of peak cricket season when our lads are up and firing I'd be rightly pissed off, perhaps shitty even.

5 months of rust, slow pitch, porridge outfield, and an opponent with nothing to lose and actually gets it together on the day - I say it's comforting.

Because that's about the only time Australia lose.

[Mugabe]

Zimbabarque!

Our team must continue to strike fear in the heart of the white man, our real enemy!

By the way that Taylor honky can play.

[nick]

What about Mike Hussey in the advert? Mr Cricket looks like he's been hanging out with Mr Hungry Jacks for 6 months...

[Pedro the Ignorant]

20/20 joke cricket should suit the bug eyed chucker.

[Ben P]

2020 World Cup is hard to care about when the Hawks are still alive in September - or should I say that they are Septopic?

International cricket died along with Bob Woolmer at the fiasco that was the World Cup in the West Indies - and until certain race-baiting, bribe-taking, showpony cricketing nations get serious about playing to win and forget about postcolonial political shenanigans, and show Daryl Hair some respect, I'll be off somewhere reading a book - hope someone will come and let me know (having said that - why did I bother renewing my MCC subs? Oh yeah, the Hawks...)

[pat]

Cricket? But none of this matters, no none of it. In 24 hours we will know the fate of the Mighty Eels. Either the Spring sadness begins yet again or Winter continues with the fight!

An Ashes series, a World Cup, 10 x Twenty20 for a Provan & Summons in 2007!

[pat]

No, make that NEVER win a Twenty20 for the NRL Gladiators Trophy.

[pat]

This is a tad embarrassing.

[Tony T.]

That's gold, Pat. As a noted cricket writer, I'm sure Spanky would shrug and concede timing's everything.

I like his mozz:

Unless Australia improve substantially, they will be out of the competition by the time this newspaper hits the streets.

And this:

England have plenty of options and a bag full of tricks.

If said bag of tricks is supposed to contain Maddy, Wright, Schofield, Mascarenhas and Kirtley then, to quote the old Lotto ad, they should have brought a bigger bag.

Maybe one that includes those idiots from last summer: Joyce, Loye and Nixon.

Nevertheless, it's early days and I haven't see a lot of the Twenty/20 Canny Poms. Who knows, they might yet have what it takes.

[nick]

Apparently Murali is at home planning Twenty20Twenty - where only players with over 20 degrees of arm flexion will compete for the Slinky Cup. Shoaib Akthar will be joining him as a bat consultant - to help players achieve the required limb bend.

[Professor Rosseforp]

The Twenty20twenty trophy will be a gold-plated set of protractors, opened at a 35 degree angle, but marked 19.5 degrees.

[Tony T.]

The trophy will be called the Foster Elliott Sub-Tractor.