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Same for you, Headingly 81!

Bloody hell, I thought it was all over when I went to bed last night, and then it was.

Well done to the Strayans, and the mercurial Shane Warne, I havn't seen any of the match yet but the figures make for bad reading this morning.

Surely we've got to drop Gilo now in favour of a spinner who can actually take wickets, I think our manager may be in for some tough questioning from the Brit press.

Better than Edgbaston.

Failing to pinch a match that should have been lost is different from losing a game that never should have been a contest.

Les Burdett - genius!

Well that was a relief.

See ya Marto, King Of (s)Pain and the Secretary (PA) as well I would think... at least for the rest of the Ashes.

Maybe Gerisnt Jones as well??

And didn't the Aussies look emotional afterwards...

They won't say it publicly... but welcome back The Ashes!!

13thMan is a very lucky man.

"You're always best off at the ground. Watching these things on telly is agony." Too true. Bye all - I'm off.

It's a great omen, Jimbo. Tomorrow night we'll come home like a rocket with 20 in the music round.

TT I think I would prefer to come home like a rocket the following week... LOL

Duncan Fletcher: "We included Giles because we wanted to bat to No. 8 ... we think Ashley can do a better job at that."

Hahaha... can't bat, can't spin it and can't catch 'em either.

Sounds vaguely familiar...

Monty can't do any WORSE can he?!?!?!

I'll tell ya what though, Martyn's dismissal is the only evidence anyone needs for the selectors to give him the bone.

How old is he? Take a leaf out of The Huss' book for christ sake.

YS and Jim: Why Giles bowled so much is completely beyond me. Every time he ran in, you knew a little pressure was released. Whether Monty is any better is an arguable point, but he certainly might have come in handy today. Fletcher's reluctance to pick him will almost certainly be equated with Ponting's decision to bowl at Birmingham last year. A career defining mistake; right or wrong.

Marto would be a monty - ho ho - to get boned, but apparently Watson is still struggling and is a long shot to be available in Perth. He might just hang on. Team balance, chemistry, all that bollocks.

Well TT although I haven't seen him play Monty seems to be universally regarded as a more potent spin weapon than the King Of Spain...

Certainly an aggressive move as opposed to the usual defensive one.

But also remember that Punter's decision to bowl at Birm was presumably a (sort of) instant decision thing whereas Chevy Chase (Fletch) has had quite a while to think about which spinner to choose (or both in view of Anderson's ineffectualness... ineffectuality?? ineffectualisciousness?? whatever...)

I think Chevy is a victim of the old boy syndrome.. LOL

Thank God.

Yeah, there's no doubt Chevy did his own thing in picking The Gilo. He's gonna wear it forever.

The Pommy papers are going to be ruthless. Even the so-called sensible papers will let England have it between the eyes, flush on the jaw and right up the gonga.

No points for guessing the scape goats.

I assume Normblog Geras was at the SACA, too. Lucky, lucky bastard!

Geoff Boycott was highly critical of the umpiring when England batted, and to be fair, there were a couple of roughies. But he WAS NOT highly critical when Straya were dudded in England last year. He was very much in "that's the rub of the green" territory. Git.

Mistakes in the Pommy Sun:

No side in the 123-year history of the competition has ever come back to level the series after going two behind.

Au contraire, mon tabloid. 1936-37 in Australia: Straya lost the first two and then won the next three. So they tied the series before going on to win it.

Nor is it a 123-year history. The first test was in 1877, making it a 129-year history.

Bwa...bwa...bwahahahahahahhhahahahahahhaha...

Who the FUCK declares at 6-551 with two batsman* at the crease?! Freddie must have been born too close to the ICI plant at Runcorn. That decision was AS bad if not worse than Punter's decision to bowl at Edgbaston.

*I'm assuming Giles is a batsman cuz he's certainly can't bowl and can't catch.

BTW, gotta say that Warney labelling Bell "The Sherminator" is a classic.

Come on, Murph. If it was Australia, they would have declared then, too. Two days at the crease is plenty enough time to set up a big lead. If The Gilo didn't have butter thumbs, we would have been fucked.

Get a load of this rubbish. Dicky Pounder is going to have a fit.

Shoaib and Asif acquitted

Shoaib Akhtar and Mohammad Asif have been acquitted by the tribunal appointed to review their appeals against the drugs ban imposed on them by an earlier committee. The three-man committee, headed by Justice Fakhruddin Ebrahim, voted two to one in favour of the acquittal. Haseeb Ahsan, former Test cricketer, and Ebrahim were in favour of the acquittal while the third member, Danish Zaheer, dissented.

"This appeal committee holds that Shoaib Akhtar and Mohammad Asif will not be deemed to have committed a doping offence," Ibrahim told reporters in Karachi. "The ban and punishment imposed by the earlier tribunal is hereby set aside as being contrary to the provision of laws."

"At home you just feel shouse and bark at the telly from the next room because you can't watch."
That's exactly what I was doing throughout the second session. Then again, the cleaning I was engaged in (yep - I was that desperate) was rivetting compared to The Pies innings.
Oh what an entirely out of character decision of mine it was to wander in for the final session. Un-fucking-believable. Without a doubt one of - fuck that, THE - greatest sporting event I've been at.
My thought: The Chef and 'Donkey' Martyn can pack their bags now. Langer should, at the very least, be out shopping for luggage, coz he's next. What a mob of tools. Hungry and Watto in for Perth in place of the first two wankers, and Haddin to follow if Gilly doesn't continue to improve.
The Poms should never have lost this. They brought it all upon themselves. At best, we should have gotten a draw, but they should have batted faster in the first innings and won the match. I particularly like the fact that their batsmen were as shithouse as ours were in Pomgolia last year.
Piss off Edgbaston!

I still disagree Tony. They should have tried for 700 and then had a crack at Australia twice (possibly consecutively). Psychologically, 700 is much more to overcome than 550.

Agreed about Giles. But who's fault is that? I couldn't believe that, in a post-match interview with Athers, Duncan Fletcher stuck to his guns that Giles was rightfully picked...for his batting.

Ridiculous.

Why not pick another batsman who's an effective part-time bowler? They've got to have one or two around the traps. Collingwood can bowl (medium), so can the Jarpie bogan.

I guess being Freddie's bumchum gets you a long way.

Even so, no team can win without taking 20 wickets. Freddie is carrying an injury, Harmison is nowhere, Anderson is a passenger. They would have been better with Panesar or, even, Mahmood on that pitch.

BTW. Collingwood got screwed in the Man of the Match contest.

Well, I've posted my post match thoughts in the previous entry, but I'll paraphrase:
SU-FUCKING-PERB!! Our lot went off, and finally managed to shut those Barmy pricks up. A truly magical moment. I can almost taste those Ashes - and for a change, the taste is goooooood!
The only really bad umpiring decision was Freeman's (love that Tone!) re: Strauss. Then again, I reckon Pietersen got lucky a couple of times, so that was, perhaps, the evener-upper.

Well, no - apparently I somehow managed to put my post-match thoughts a few posts up in this entry. Dunno how I did that. A mystery.
Perhaps I'm still all giddy from the excitement.

I repeat my thoughts of two days ago just a coupla posts down: "The poms need a win. Where is the press pressure? The poms bat again - what are they gonna set? Think about it. The pressure is on them. They have to set a target.

This test is a draw or an Oz win - who will bet me? Email me."

I haven't come to gloat, nay that is beneath me. Vindication is enough satisfaction for any man.

13th man

I reckon Marto will get another crack (his last) at the WACA. Australia are sitting pretty at 2-0, so there's no point in rushing Watto back and risking further injury. Although, Hussey's promotion to No4 was ominous.

Hayden is a real worry. He'll get one more go.

By the time the show rolls into Melbourne the likely team will be:

Langer, Jacques, Ponting, Hussey, Clarke, Watson, Gilchrist, Warne, Lee, Clark, McGrath

I'd even be tempted to put Watto at No4 to see how he goes.

Hard to see England coming back from today - must be absolutely shattered. The Ashes are ours already, can't see England winning anything, and Warne and McGill will rip through England in Sydney. England just doesn't have the bowlers to beat Australia here. Only Hoggard and Flintoff have shown anything remotely like Test standard bowling, and even then they are still looser than our bowlers. Anderson and Giles are just a waste of space on the team sheet. I'd thought the batting was fine until today - now they've failed dismally twice out of 4 innings, so thats hardly up to scratch. I can't see what England can do to change things for the better this series. Can't imagine Panesar is going to rip through our batting (although he'd be better than Giles and his straight breaks), Saj Mahmood bowled rubbish the only time I've seen him out here. Don't know about Read, haven't seen him - actually I've thought Jones has gone ok in the 2 games so far without setting the world on fire.

No one would have been surprise with a draw, pat, but good call on the win.

My best call on a win was in a Sheff. Shield match in 1991. Qld set SA 506, and our openers put on 200 at stumps, and I bet on an SA win from there. Picked up a yummy slab of beer.

No one had got 506 in the fourth innings to win a FC match before. Mind you against this English attack, I'd fancy Australia's chances, given time.

Lots of hyperbole by the players. Nothing will come close to 1989 for me. Winning back the Frankie in 1995 was better as well. But this was a damn sweet win.

Quite agree SW, nothing can compare to "Winning back the Frankie in 1995" and especially the sheer satisfaction of hearing Richie Richardson bitterly pronounce at series end "This is the worst Australian team I have ever played against." I had that wav on windows startup, shutdown, new mail - everything. It was the series that just kept on giving.

Now I wanna hear Chappeli, Greig, Lawson, Lillee and every other has been announce that they are completely consumed with bitterness, envy, capriciousness, avarice and every other like word in the thesaurus - so much so in fact that it is time to move on and hand over to the next generation of commentators. And I wanna see every pom removed from radio and tv commentary here in Oz. If I wanna hear their opinions I'll read and English paper. Otherwise - they can fuck off.

I want to see England smashed into the ground.

Damn, according to my Foxtel, they are going to show another two hours highlights of today's play.

How good is this Foxtel thingy?

Now the journos are calling for Fletcher's head. Cricket journalism is offensively stupid.

England beat Oz in England because of Fletcher's strategy and tactics and the English team's discipline under Vaughan to stick to the plan. Troy Cooley made an ordinary bunch of bowlers seem like world beaters.

Australia lost because of - dropped catches. It's that simple. Punter's captaincy didn't help but then again I remember Waugh struggled in his first series as Captain in the Windies as well.

Now Cooley is with our bowlers, Vaughan's injured, and the English lack the discipline to stick to a plan. Flintoff is carrying an ankle injury. Hoggard is still great but the rest of them are massively over rated. Especially Pietersen. Harmison is bowling like Harmison has always bowled. Why does everyone suddenly bag him now as if it were all a big surprise? And of course they miss Jones. So what has Fletcher got to do with it - nothing. He's doing the best with what he's got.

I'm not writing off the poms. They have the coach and some talent to win them this series still. First thing, ignore the press. Punter let them get to him in England but now he's a changed man. The English can do it too. First they must close ranks against the press. They could do with a talk by Wayne Bennett on how to turn the press to your advantage and make an ordinary bunch of sportsmen absolute genius maniacs.

Pat:

Good to see the anger management is going well.

Tone, on these Mumbaiesque wickets we couldn't take 20 wickets with our current attack fit, nevermind hobbling, so I blame Fletch for trying to force a win when the first of four draws could have seen us lose the series 1-0 and then blame our injuries for the next two years till we get your lot on proper wickets with a Simon Jones propelled duke ball.

The sex pest drug cheat(what d'you mean bitter?)was outstanding, but atrocious shots, a comedy run out and two dreadful umpiring decisions were half the equation. The ball that got Harmison lbw would have fucking sconed Langer!

In the end, though, any team that finds a place for Gilo cannot be considered a proper test outfit.

I don't know who got man of the match but I would have given it to Stuey Clark - excellent line and length bowling and a thoroughly decent chap.

Here we go. Blame the umps. That's right: England lost because their no10 batsman got a bad lbw decision.

ffs! grow up.

Back again - had to watch all of the evening sports shows to help retain that warm glow. Even watched 'Sports Tonight'! Of course, all I rally have to do is close my eyes and watch the picture show in my head...
Man of the Match went to Punter. IMHO, it could have gone to any of a bunch: S.Clark for his superb efforts, Piggy Hoggard for a superb bowling effort, Shameless ofr best ever support act in two innings, and Punter for doing the necessary. Collingwood is probably a Poms tip, but really: on that deck, half of each side could have scored at least a ton. And his efforts didn't turn out to be match-winning, so fuck him. I agree with Warnie - he's just not that good.
Fletcher is a clown - he made some very bad selections (remember, he's a selector a la Bobby Simpson, and didn't that work a treat), so he deserves a fair bit of stick. Just one example: Panesar may not be the Messiah every Pom seems to hope he'll be, but he should have played in Adelaide. GiLo did his best. It wasn't even close to good enough, but he did his best. He shouldn't have been selected - he can't be overly blamed for trying in a situation where he was out of his depth.
As far as the Pakis go - what did anyone expect. At the time of the first hearing, it was important that they be seen to be doing the right thing. Since then, they've had their way with Hair, the ICC, and every cricket fan around the world. Of course they now revert to type: they are a bunch of fucking cheats. I look forward to Dick Pound and his latest salvo.

Read my post again.

Two bad decisons were a small part of the outright demise, that's all I'm saying. On a fifth day wicket Warney will have any team struggling and I full expected him to take 4-5 wickets, as he did all last series. On this belter of a strip we needed the rest of the boys to dig in, which only Collingwood did.

Flintoff and Jones played two atrocious shots( didn't I mention something like this before?)and the run out was terrible cricket from nervy players. As such OUR POOR CRICKET left ourselves hoping to avoid any dodgy decisions as OUR POOR CRICKET left us no room for manouevre(if that's spelt correctly, it'll be a first)

So calm down, Murph. I've watched England collapse for decades, it only took me 14 years to stop blaming the umpires.

Thanks to the win, I think Martyn, Hayden, Langer, Lee and McGrath have a one/two game reprieve before some changes occur. The selectors are giving them a chance to win back the Ashes in Perth or Melbourne, and then it's pink slip time.

Anyway, well done boys. Never doubted you for a second :-)

Regarding the Paks, I expected nothing less, and to be honest I don't mind. World cricket needs teams with decent bowling attacks. Placid pitches and pop gun bowling is a bit trying - unless watching a world full of Jimmy Andersons does it for you.

Yeah if it takes a few shots of horsedope to even up the contest between bat and ball, that is fine with me.

I also have to add a hearty fuck you to England as well.

See, the first test I went to was against the West Indies in Perth circa 84 and the memory still chills my blood. Then, for the best part of the next decade, it was a painful series of defeats with fleeting glimpses of success that never could satisfy.

I spent my teenage years (well parts of them) poring through cricket books and marvelling at names like Noble, Darling, Bradman, Harvey, Chappell, Lillee. Then watch as our team would peel off another series loss, each defeat another bitter blow, another mouthful of ashes.

And so, with the fondness of a Pole for the Germans, or a Czech for the Russians, do I regard the English, West Indian and New Zealand cricket teams. I don't care that the sides they field resemble the South Perth Boys Brigade 'C' team. I don't care that we've been top of the world for 10 years. Each defeat we inflict is thoroughly deserved. Each win, another wrong righted.

And no, I will never be satisfied.

Just watched the replay - actually, that's not quite correct, I revelled in the replay - and I was STILL nervous during the chase. I am probably pathetic.

Anyhoo, time for bed.

PS: Woody, I agree that Strauss was dudded. What's more, his his dismissal started the rot. But Harmy's ElBee was one of those that wasn't out on closer examination, but looked plumb when it happened. Boycott was sucking lemons about them, which was in stark contrast to his philosophical approach last year when we got stiffed in England. "Ohh well, it's just the rub of the green," he was then, and all that bollocks. He is a tool.

"Horsedope"??

I thought what Warney took was a steroid masking agent...

Am I the only Australian who's disappointed here? The amazing thing about the 2005 Ashes was not so much the result, but for what a brilliant contest it was, how close the middle three tests were, and for the feeling of a new era beginning on Day 5 of the Oval, similar to that in the West Indies in '95. I had a feeling that we wouldn't see that again, but thought we'd get a bit better than this!

I wanted to watch this series to see some good cricket. I didn't want to watch us humiliate them again.

I'd hardly say the last 3 days were a humiliation. Then again, I couldn't give a rat's arse about English feelings or sentiments right now. These arseclowns got a reception with Liz the Boss when they won last year.
We'll give our guys a few free drinks at the pub and get on with our lives, right after the Third Test win.

Fuck 'em, they deserved to lose.

Eat some carrots, or get your head out of your arse - that was Champagne Cricket today. Humiliation - bring it on!

Good cricket IS Warne tormenting and befuddling England's middle order. You'll never see the game at a higher level.

Carrot, you're not the only disappointed Aussie. I wanted to see a close draw, which it would have been but for more dodgy umpiring from the usual suspects. A close draw would have maintained interest in the series while giving a thrilling finish to this match. Now the series is all but certain to deliver more of the same crap we saw through the 1990's that made me lose interest in cricket until the Indian tour of 2003/04. Same with the Brisbane test - imagine if Freddie and Jaapie had not fallen to bad umpiring, and one of them had gone on to a marathon innings like Jaapie did in Brisbane innings 2 or Adelaide innings 1. An Aussie thrashing in Brisbane would have been far from certain, although an Aussie victory was still likely. As in 2005, the umpiring bias is turning matches, only the other way this time, while the only international umpire with any credibility is collecting his superannuation thanks to the corrupt, cheating, shameless Pakis. And again we see the total dependence on the venerable and venereal Warne for wickets on days 4/5. He could easily drop dead any time soon from some horrible
scrotal infection, then where will Australia be?

Tony, your sarcastic prediction yesterday of a run chase of 180 was pretty much spot on. You clearly have psychotic powers. However my memory of Boycs seems to be different to yours, as I recall Geoff Boycott during 2005 frequently expressing his dismay at the dreadful umpiring decisions against Australia, especially at Trent Bridge. When did he play the "rub of the green" card?

Well shit, I was truly hoping for a draw... and if England's boys had had the spine to hold the Aussies out for even 10 more overs it would of been. Nice work Pieterson, you let your ego throw away your teams best chance of retaining the ashes, as it was you pissed it up the wall, broke the barmy armys hearts, and completely fucked the series. Better make a ton or two in Perth to atone for your sins.

Bet Warne won't let him forget that one in a hurry either.

I do hope the poms locate their spines and reinsert by the time they hit the WACA, going to Melbourne in a dead rubber test would truly suck - although good on Punter for having every intention of making it a 5-0 jobbie and grinding them into the dust.

Brett Lees recent figures against the Poms:

1/51
1/98
1/139
2/35

And then getting himself fined.

Why doesn't someone dump the prat in Sydney harbour?

"while the only international umpire with any credibility is collecting his superannuation thanks to the corrupt, cheating, shameless Pakis."

Well there's also Simon Taufel, but he's not allowed to umpire our matches either.

Koertzen and Bucknor are both jokes and have been for some time.

I still smell an Indian Betting Syndicate scam. The odds are just about right for me to put a thousand on England to retain the Ashes.

Someone remind me, what do they have to do to do that then??

I can remember vividly the commentary last series when either McGrath or Lee were bowling, and should have had 2 wickets in two balls, apart from the fact the first one was bowled from a no ball and the second was an absolute sitter dropped.

Boycott's commentary went something along the lines of:

"Ha ha twice in 2 balls! Oh my! Couldn't have happened to a better bloke!"

Too right fuck him...

Martyn,Lee and probably whomever was the 12th man. All gotta go by Perth. Lee needs the ball belted up his jacksie, the expensive little twit. Where the hell is Andrew Symonds and Gill?

Symonds can't play Test. Then again, neither can Hayden, Martyn or Langer.

If Symonds was up to it, he'd be in now. The selectors would give anything for him to come good for tests, but they aren't prepared to take the risk (again) in such a big series.

Ah, but after Perth, it won't be such a big series.

Yeah - after Perth, I'd be experimenting like mad. Another run - maybe - for Roy. Hungry a cert in place of the Chef. Donkey gone to make room for Shameless, then Clarke in at 5. Watson in at 6, the Gilly (but keeping Haddin in mind). Sarfraz (that's gotta change), Warnie, Pigeon (if fit) and maybe Johnson in place of Lee. With Tait on the fringes. Unfortunately, a lot of the current mob are on the cusp of retirement, and I can see them all going in a brief period. A shattering period if we don't plan. We need to circumvent that, so start experimenting. Consider, also: each state side has at least one bloke who could probably make the step up. Consider further: Clark is 31, Shameless the same. They should have been in baggy green at least a year ago. Let's not keep making those mistakes. Some of the old guard need a gentle shove in the right direction - for the good of Strayan cricket.

Warney could easily bowl for another 5 years.

Being a fat, unfit old cunt isn't much different to being a fat, unfit young cunt.

There are leg spinners over 50 years of age bowling in first grade in suburban cricket. Their runup is no shorter than Warney's is.

As long as his finger holds up he could play until he's 45. Didn't Dutchey and Benaud play to that age anyway?

When he's not bowling, he sits at 1st slip, and when he's batting he swings from the bootlaces. You don't have to be in peak condition to do that.

And besides, what else would he do?

Mate, i'm not one for saying "i told you so " Tony, but.......

You seem to have a very Un Aussie (dare i say Victorian?) sense of negativity about our Ashes chances. This team has thought of nothing else since our unfortunate loss 18 months ago and every single one of them has made it their mandate to secure that little old Urn for another 20 years. Their intensity is frightening and i sense that Punter would knock over his old man in the street to beat the Poms this time around.

The Poms seem to be under the misapprehension that the WACA is as hard and fast as of old. Not when i was there last it wasn't-it's a bloody featherbed ? Where is the clay ?

Never mind all that, the Poms are a beaten bunch, a dishevelled rabble, undercooked and negativity abound. THIS time i want a 5-0. NO, i DEMAND it.

Brett, me old dawg, I'm not unAussie, I'm just unWilling to buy into the it's-all-over-fest. In short: Lid. On. It.

its.all.over.now.

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