Been to the quack. Having been in hospital last year my GP advised a once-over from a specialist. "Just need to make sure," he said. "Tick the boxes, an all that." I said he sounded like a football coach.
Anyhoo, the specialist said exactly the same thing as the hospital quack who lost my records, the hospital quack who didn't lose my records, and my GP: I have low blood pressure. THAT box-ticking cost me $160. There are at least 160 different things I'd rather do with the money. Bet on the ICC scapegoating Darrell Hair, for a start, despite the piss poor odds. These medicos are on a good wicket, aren't they. Slyly manoevering their patients around to rake in the dough. What a lurk.
You'll be happy to know the low blood pressure isn't bad. Because I'm too cool for my own good, I've plenty of room left to throw violent tantrums without the related stress issues. So, that's something to look forward to. But at 160 bucks for 10 minutes, you'd think the doctor would have come up with a better remedy than "Eat more salt." That's right - salt. Surprised he didn't pull out a jar of leeches, or stick mercury up my date.
<-- A snack best served with a cleansing beaker of brine.
BOO!
Posted by: DJ | 29 August 2006 at 16:21
There are many reasons I look forward to reading your blog Tony but the image of a doctor sticking mercury up your date is not one of them.
A very big BOO from me too.
Posted by: The (WHMECDM) President | 29 August 2006 at 16:26
Mercury is one of them full-sized planets...Pluto in the date would have been better. When you go the date, go dwarf as a rule of thumb
Posted by: Russell Allen | 29 August 2006 at 16:57
I mean doodle. What was I thinking? Clearly mercury is a cure for the front end.
BOO! to the lot of you.
Posted by: Tony.T | 29 August 2006 at 17:54
Get a job where you actually have to do something. Then your blood pressure wil go up just like the rest of us.
Hope that helps. Just give a yell if you need more advice.
Posted by: Francis Xavier Holden | 29 August 2006 at 19:46
Teaching may be therapeutic then. Young people make my blood pressure rise.
PS: I have a splinter in my arse. Should I stand up?
Posted by: Tony.T | 29 August 2006 at 20:07
Don't eat more salt, Tony. It makes you want beer.
Posted by: hungbunny | 30 August 2006 at 03:26
You wanna know something, Bunny? The longer you are off the piss, the worse the stuff stinks. Red wine is the worst; it smells revolting.
Posted by: Tony.T | 30 August 2006 at 07:07
"Red wine is the worst; it smells revolting."
.. let's not talk cigarette smoke smell eh?
Having been the filter tip wagon for 18 months and we can suss out the smoke from a 1 mg Horizon at 100,000 paces.
Not that I'm being a Damascus Road converted zealot. True! I keep telling my few remaining "this side of the ashes to ashes ceremony" huff'n'puff friends, "Go for it! Be it on your own epitaph youse losers." (But I DO how much I enjoyed lighting up.)
But as Maggie, the pin up totty of the conservatives once almost said, "The lad's not for turning."
Posted by: Sedgwick | 30 August 2006 at 18:46