I've had enough of fake yobbos in advertisements. Booze ads are the worst, the VB campaign has outstayed its welcome, but that bastard Bundy Bear business bites me hardest. Does anyone seriously believe those three dicks who chuck the red sock in the bear's bath aren't your classic Brunsroy trendoids? The tall dick, the one in the middle, he needs extra working on. Why is he wearing a tee-shirt over his windcheater? Wanker. Why would ANYONE do that? It can only be because they think they're "dressed" sharp. They aren't. They look stupid. Last night I walked down the shops and this bloke who lives nearby was sitting on his stoop playing a guitar. Horrible sound, it was. Get inside. If you're going to show out, have something good to show out with, don't just annoy the neighbours with vile strumming. Anyway, he was also arse-about in the poly-cotton department. Talk about twice the sin. I bet he had one of those girly Chinese-writing tattoos, too. Strolling past I gave him a cheery "You got you clothes on back-to-front, Mush." He looked at me kind of odd, wondering what I meant but eventually said bugger all. On the way home I noticed he'd gone back inside. I'd like to think he'd scarpered in to change his clothes and smash his guitar against the wall. But given first appearances, it's doubtful he has any shame. More like he'd gone to polish his piercings and throw on another tee - one with a giant brand label.
Nope, a talking pink bear I can handle, but fake yobbos - get out of it!
Update! Fauxbo: a fake bum.
They should get Dick Cheney over to hunt out that fucking bear. Hopefully the bullets that miss hit those 3 dicks.
Posted by: RT | 13 June 2006 at 14:47
They manufacture shirts like that now. No actual shirt underneath, just sleeves made out of a different fabric sewn on.
Um, so I'm told.
Posted by: carneagles | 13 June 2006 at 16:36
Nothing to do with the above blog Tony, but I fully expected something relating to your comeback against Japan in Germany yesterday
Posted by: vaughny | 13 June 2006 at 17:03
Three dicks who chuck the red sock ...
Now there's a phrase you wouldn't want to mispronounce. Maybe I've been struck with a sudden case of dyslexia, but when I first glanced over this post, I thought, 'Bloody hell! that TonyT's being saucy today!'
Posted by: TimT | 13 June 2006 at 17:42
I must admit that I always think of beastiality when I see that advert. Like, what's next? Flogging fizzy drinks with vodka to young nubiles and the chicks turn up with a female green sheep and all the blokes go apeshit for the bah bah.
No Inzed jokes please.
Posted by: youcancallmemeyer | 13 June 2006 at 18:23
Those guys go to the Smoko Van to look like they're one of the lads, buy a Four n Twenty, then sneak off back home to watch Judge Judy. Cancerous Polyp on the Anus of Australia, the lot of 'em.
Posted by: Russell Allen | 13 June 2006 at 18:43
It's the bear that shits me the most. That arrogant swagger, the voice that is equal parts sneer and stupidity ... bloody hell, I know the type.
Posted by: TimT | 13 June 2006 at 19:03
As hideous as it sounds I'd rather have a rum with the bear than any of the three humans.
The bear should just eat them and be done with it.
Posted by: gav | 13 June 2006 at 19:27
If I'd ever seen the ad you're talking about I'd have a smartarse comment to make. But. No.
OTOH I'm having a hard time stopping myself from walking up to young girls with fur coats, scarves, ugg boots and warm trousers but with their kidneys and belly exposed to artic winds and telling them they'll catch a cold or something.
Posted by: Francis Xavier Holden | 13 June 2006 at 19:45
my mummy raised me to be a good & true Brunsroy trendoid, and I'm damned confused as to what I was doing in a Bundy ad anyway. Isn't rose making a comeback?
Posted by: via collins | 13 June 2006 at 21:02
Rose Hancock? Hope not.
Posted by: carneagles | 13 June 2006 at 21:10
Rose auditioned for the role of the red sock. Passed it, too. Look closely next time, that's not dye, it's rouge.
Posted by: Tony.T | 13 June 2006 at 21:34
I bet Rose's drop of choice is, indeed, rosé. Mateus, or maybe Coolibah casks.
Posted by: Tony.T | 13 June 2006 at 21:44
the carlton draught big-ad was a superb use of the fake yobbo in a beer commercial. I say fake yobbo because they all looked like demis roussos - arguably worse than tshirts on the outer.
Posted by: girtbysea | 13 June 2006 at 23:00
It's wonderful what you can do with a yobbo and some classical music.
Posted by: Tony.T | 14 June 2006 at 14:20
Lucky me to escape seeing these vile ads.
While you are squirming, we get farm products ads on Regional TV - mainly for all the evil chemicals they stuff your meat dinners with; and if you saw them, you wouldn't eat it.
Posted by: brownie | 16 June 2006 at 18:32
When you mentioned a fake bum, I thought you meant some kind of pink plastic arse.
Me to SO the other night, watching ad in question:
"That bear shits me. If they're trying to make him look cool-and-hip, why are they making him say "fellas"? No one of any intelligence says "fellas"."
SO; "Ummmm, do you notice you are criticising the bear's choice of words, but you have no problem at all about the fact there are people in a pub with a giant talking bear?"
I had to admit he had a point.
Posted by: Helen | 19 June 2006 at 09:53
Like I said, Helen. Talking pink bear - good. Fake yobbos talking rubbish to a talking pink bear - bad.
Posted by: Tony.T | 19 June 2006 at 22:24
Fake bum?
Posted by: Tony.T | 20 June 2006 at 06:56