UP YER DATE!
Were you asked for your three favourite sporting moments, chances are you'd remember when and where those moments occurred. You know, like when Cliffy Young won the Sydney to Hobart in a pair of thongs at the Hammersmith Odeon. Not so Cameron Ling on SEN who recently pick his three, one of which was: "Well, obviously there's Kieren Perkins' swim at the 2000 Sydney Olympics." Obviously, that's news to Perkins. The only thing Kieren was swimming in at Sydney 2000 was autograph hunters. [Update! And the wake of Grant Hackett.] Whenever you see these polls it's hard not to conclude that the person doing the picking is just picking the usual suspects, naming names they're expected to name.
BULLY SHIT!
Then there's Gerard Neesham who was talking wacky tactics (Who better?) on White Line Fever: "Australia lost the hockey at the 1976 Olympics when the Indians lay down in the penalty area to render any shot at goal 'lifted'. India then snuck away for one goal at the other end and won the gold." A result that might surprise our Kiwi frien ... acquaintances who won the hockey gold at Montreal. By the way, Kiwis I bump into always seem to want to remind me of this monumental affair. My standard reply: "Like, bro - hockey?"
GAIN EVENT
The good: Nine's Tony Jones tees up his mates to toss in $10 each so they can have a barby at Jones' house and watch the Green/Mundine stoush on Main Event.
The bad: Nine's Tony Jones invites his mates around to his house for a barby so as to watch the Green/Mundine stoush on Main Event. Tone then bails them up at the door, hitting them for $10 each.
You decide.
BLACK AND NIGHTMARE
This subby in The Australian knows either nothing about football in Melbourne, or Unca Rupy has ordered a Sinney beat-up. AFL puppets, The Pinks, could win the next three flags, as far as I'm concerned, as long as it prevents Collingwood from winning just one. I mean, really, name me just one non-Collingwood supporter here in Poohtown, 3000 who wants The Poys to win the premiership.
CONTROL THE DICE
"Rolling the dice" has got out of hand. (Ho. Ho.) Initially, it was the pet phrase of Jason Junktime Bennett, and to a lesser extent Steve Quartermaine, but lately it's slithered into everything football. The AFL makes a decision on the rules, they are rolling the dice. Aint Kilda sack Grant Thomas, they are rolling the dice. Mark Williams moves Chad Cornes to full-forward, he's rolling the dice. Terry Wallace goes all-out flood, he's rolling the dice. Neil Craig finally mans up, he's rolling the dice. David Nietz rolls a dice, he's rolling the dice. For fuck sake, stop it!
Hold on...so if I read between the lines, are you telling me that Melbourne teams have a history of winning AFL premierships. Crazy! First I've heard it...
Soon you'll be saying Santa Claus isn't real
Posted by: Russell Allen | 24 May 2006 at 13:02
It's an odd concept for sure, Russ. But Vic teams have been known to win the odd flag way back when.
Santa probably barracks for Sydney.
Posted by: Tony.T | 24 May 2006 at 13:04
Such a well crafted and thoughtfully written post. A joy to read. It is right up there in the rarified air of the blogosphere this one is.
Posted by: girtbysea | 24 May 2006 at 13:24
Stop using the phrase "rolling the dice" is rolling the dice... or taking the pill to the fat side in junk time (is it me or do most of those terms have dietary connotations?)
Before we all get conscripted into the Magpie Army, I might wait until they get an injury of any description and see how they go. Its this sort of dream run with your side that you want at the end of the season, not 8 rounds in... see Sydeney circa 2005.
Posted by: Adsy | 24 May 2006 at 18:54
Kieren Perkins did swim at the Sydney Olympics - he just won a silver medal behind Hackett.
Posted by: ns | 24 May 2006 at 19:31
Melbourne are bound to win the AFL this year now. After all, I've been converted to fanship (fandom?) after my one game. I have a scarf and everything. I even vaguely understood the rules of the game. Better than the Yanks standing behind me, anyway.
Many thanks again for your hospitality, Tony. Next time you're in the northern backwaters of England or in the even more backwater-like environs of London, I hope to be able to reciprocate.
Posted by: Paul B | 24 May 2006 at 20:28
Thanks, Girt.
Adsy: ALL predictions need the rider "injuries notwithstanding".
NS: Well I'll be buggered. Still, it wasn't the swim Cling was talking about. Unless, of course, his Great Moments sights are set very low.
Paul: No worries, a pleasure to have you along. I suggest my password upon someday entering northern England be "Whatever you reckon, mate."
Posted by: Tony.T | 24 May 2006 at 22:54
When interstate teams win we don't have to put up with as many local idiots climbing the bandwagon and going around with their Collingwood/Essendon scarves that have been under the bed since the last time they went to a game in 1995.
Therefore if we're not going to win it go Freo.
Posted by: Adam 1.0 | 25 May 2006 at 10:21
TT ... it's a scandal that you've duped Paul into supporting the Dees, does he realise he's in for a lifetime of grief? But then, if he's from Ooop North, maybe he's despised and acquainted with grief already?
Adam ... if the bloody Dockers win the flag the West will be uninhabitable and I'll have to migrate to South Africa. An easy threat to make, it's not gonna happen. Go Eags.
My greatest moments in sporting history was when Woosha ironed out Derm, when Lethal broke the point post and when "Fatty" Lamb took an overhead mark.
Posted by: os | 25 May 2006 at 13:02
I don't believe it. Fatty never took and overhead mark.
Posted by: Tony.T | 25 May 2006 at 16:07
Yup, did so - he was lairising mind you. And that's not all - once I saw Banno kick on his right foot twice in a row.
Posted by: os | 25 May 2006 at 16:41
Surely that's not Drew Banfield. You mean Dave Banovich, former coach of South Perth, right?
Posted by: Tony.T | 25 May 2006 at 16:54
Dear old Fatty. I've got a tape from the 1995 preseason where Lamb was trying out for a special comments gig. Did a good job, except for the slight drawback that he's got a voice that makes Damien Oliver sound like Barry White.
Paul, ever seen your new team lose? Prepare to.
That Tony Jones story has to be made-up. That clown has mates now?
Posted by: carneagles | 25 May 2006 at 17:54
[blockquote]David Nietz rolls a dice, he's rolling the dice. For fuck sake, stop it![/blockquote]
I feel your pain, Tony. It's very hard to take when you know, deep down, that he was actually rolling a die.
Posted by: Clem Snide | 25 May 2006 at 22:43
Good call Clem, one does not a dice make. Anyway, what happened to "alea jacta est" - why don't we get a bit of lah de dah in our commentary, Mr Gunner Graham?
Posted by: os | 26 May 2006 at 11:36
Die, dice men!
Posted by: Tony.T | 26 May 2006 at 14:58