THE GETTING OF QUIZDOM

Sunday night, anyone catch Australia's Brainiest Quiz Master? No? Well, it wasn't too bad, as far as these things go.

First of all, the format was intriguing. Five rounds were made up of an initial qualifier; three rounds of set categories that you picked based on your score in the qualifier; and one final round made up of five questions from a previously selected special category. The lowest scores at the end of each round were eliminated.

There was a catch with the last round. (Three players were left.) The five questions in your special category were assigned a number which was plonked on a grid of 40 squares. The contestants needed to remember where their five numbers were to get two points for each. Further spicing up matters, if the contestant picked one of the other contestant's numbers and got that question right, they received three points, and the other contestant lost one of the questions from their category. If they picked any one of the non-assigned 25 squares and answered a general knowledge question correctly, they received one point.

Next, the questions were reasonably hard. They weren't dollies, duds and gimmes like most of those on WWTBAM, which is a farce up until $32,000. No, they were consistently challenging throughout the whole show. How many questions do they ask on Miwyonaire? Ten, is it? With maybe 15 asked on any one night. Well, on ABQM they asked more than 100. Good going, if you ask me. And ABQM was certainly better than Sale, with that show's emphasis on speed meaning the questions themselves were relatively simple.

Thirdly, the show skipped along at a fair clip. No surprise there, considering how many questions were asked. What was surprising was that the questions, while coming thick and fast, never seemed rushed or shoehorned into the format. They were a neat fit.

That's the upside. But thanks to Isaac Newton we know that for every action there is an equal and opposite apple.

The scores were too infrequently on the screen. Towards the end it was obvious the game was close and you could hear the audience ooo-ing and aaa-ing, but us viewers couldn't see the comparative scores.

Sandra Sully Nude did a reasonable job asking the questions, but she compromised her clout by trying to deliver some awful patter with some awful timing. Too many lines were howlers. Here's hoping a 'writer' hadn't sat around wracking his or her braincell to come up with that rubbish.

The guy who won, the big ginger. If he was the brainiest contestant, I'll eat my dictionary. He had two favourable categories to pick from which kept him in the game, and then in the last round he was able to gain maximum value from remembering where his five squares were. His special category? Stinking Star Wars, for fuck sake! The other two finalists, William from The Einstein Factor and Tony Delroy's quiz, and Rob Fulton, the fat baldy from Miwyonaire repeatedly answered tougher questions, but ended up coming second and third because they couldn't remember where all their squares were.

Not sure that Ten can run it again, once you've done Australia's Brainiest Quiz Master where do you go from there? Australia's Brainiest Quiz Master II lacks a certain verity. But if they did, somehow, run it again, they need to tweak the format so that brainiousness is better rewarded. You can't claim someone has the smartiest pants if they've won based partly on luck.

Quiz Brieflets:

Cary Young, the tool who continually adjusted his bow-tie on Sale all those years ago, and who sits around home memorising lists, blitzed in the category where dates featured, but sucked when the questions required a little thinking.

The ginger wanted to argue the toss over whether Dr No or From Russia With Love was the second Bond fillum. The official answer was FRWL, but Ginger had answered DN, citing Casino Royale as the first. It's a hoot when someone thinks they are right when they are not. I mean, EVERYONE knows the early Casino Royale was a TV show, not a movie.

No Nevin.

Everyone I have talked to about the show thought it was going to be a competition between Quiz Masters, as opposed to Quiz Masters. Know what I'm saying? A contest between Tony Barber, Eddie McGuire, Glen Ridge, etc.

The men came 1 to 6 and the nonmen 7, 8 and 9. Just thought I'd mention that, in the interests of fairness and full disclosure. It's the right thing to do, you understand.

Comments

[Tony.T]

And before you say it: like I'm really gonna watch Australia’s Brainiest Kid.

[jair]

I'd love to see the Toned Barber vs Glenn's Ridge vs Eddie McSpanker match. Would show once and for all that Eddie has absolutely no fucking clue when it comes to, well, anything.

[Tony.T]

I reckon you'd be surprised about how much The Barber knows, but I've no idea what Edwardo or Ridgey would be like.

To be fair, though, they don't need to know anything and, in Eddie's case, he's never professed to being a professor.

[jair]

I've always thought TBarb would know a thing or two, Ridgetastic wouldn't be the brightest spark in the world (Targa racing in Taswegia?), and Edina would know nada. But then, I think Edina's a cunt, so I may be biased.

[boynton]

They should have a World Series ABQM with as many drawn-out qualification rounds as the tri-nations croquet tournament.
Perhaps they could tweak the rules to sort out the clever sheep from the rote goats.
One thing that WWTBAM has over this is the reasoning over reflex, which can be good to watch sometimes.
That might favour certain brains, although the non-women might suffer.

[Some other Bruce]

Did I ever tell you about the time I punched Glenn Ridge in the guts?

WWTBAM and it's reasoning process is a reason to turn it off. Watching some idiot working their way through four choices for Scooby-Doo's best friend for $1000 is painful.

[boynton]

I agree

But watching Trevor nut out the correct answer at 125k 250k and 500k was good.
And T might recall that chilling episode featuring a very smart nonman working her way slowly through tough questions from about the $4000 mark using clever thinking.

[International Dust]

Hi there - long time listener, first time caller...

I was thinking Australia's Brainiest Pantsman might be worth a shot. I spose the questions would be irrelevant as the real test is who could shag Sully

[Norman Nonwoman]

Ugh.

[Tony.T]

B: Agree with the reasoning bit, but all too often it's a dubious process. Especially, as Bruce said, when it is used to work out Scooby Doo's pals, and other stupid topics. The good questions only make up a small percentage of the show's format.

SOB: Top work, that. Celebs don't get punched in the guts anywhere near enough.

ID: I thought that said "postman" for a moment and was about to disagree. Not quite the excitement machine, is your everyday posty. Of course, you could sack him and give him a gun. Might spice things up.

The pantsman concept would have Sam Newman as a certain starter.

[boynton]

And seeing how the format borrowed heavily from the Eintstein factor, it's a pity they didn't have a past Champion on board. The first one maybe. Another non-man.

[Tony.T]

William was their Einy contestant. Not a winner, not a nonman, either, but he did come second.

[Adam 1.0]

Haven't heard anything about the Nevin pilot yet. I wouldn't be surprised if such a fatally flawed concept didn't get up, especially given the fact that pilot itself was a technical fiasco where the computer kept breaking down every five minutes.

There was a studio audience of Deal Or Not Deal style bogans. When they found out they couldn't be picked as contestants half of them left. Then 20 of them escaped en masse after asking to go to the toilet. By the time it was over there was two people in the audience.

[Tony.T]

Brilliant! Fiacso TV is very much my go. All of that needs to somehow be incorporated into the show's format.

[DB]

It was a disgrace how the ginger chap chose SW Trilogy as his specialise subject and not the sextet. Why didn't he just choose A New Hope: Special Edition if he was going to be stingy about it all.

[Tony.T]

Why alright! Why didn't the producers of the show just say "Pick a better topic, cunt!"?

[Francis Xavier Holden]

I didn't even know it was on - I must mix in the wrong circles. I'm usually a big quiz fan but satisfy myself with Tones Delroy.

What's the Nevin story? He isn't clever or funny just got a memory - it would be easy to get rid of him (aside from sending him hunting with the USA VP) - just ask him something that required thinking or something outside of his bedsit world.

[Tony.T]

Spot on, FX - very bedsit.

[Francis Xavier Holden]

hey I want to compliment you. That piece on Nevin was good. Well spotted.

You are clearly much brighter and more intelligent than you seem on the blog and in person.

[Tony.T]

Thank you, FX, thank you very little.