Yeah, yeah, I deemed The Hoff dead, only the rest of the world doesn't seem to agree. On Valentine's Day the AGB received more than 3,000 hits looking for this picture, the sad lovelorn dags. Because the picture was over 100K, this surge meant my monthly bandwidth went from fuck all to fuck me! 90.64% to be precise, and it's only halfway through the month.
To me bandwidth was one of those nebulous terms you hear about, but tend to ignore. Like free trade agreement or multiculturalism. But now? Well, I looked it up, didn't I.
Your bandwidth allotment
The amount of transfer you are allowed with your membership per month.
When your pages are visited or files are downloaded, the data is transferred and this counts as bandwidth.
Simple really. Now that I know what it means, though, two things leap to mind:
1) Bandwidth is a misleading term. To me, an electronic engineer full bottle on Schottke diodes, SCR firing angles and Darlington pairs, bandwidth represents a frequency range. No wonder I was puzzled. Bandwidth as used on the internet only came into circulation around 1994 but for some reason represents data usage. The turds! Why didn't they call it data usage or download tally or, if they absolutely must, byteage.
2) Better slow things down around here. Bailing furiously, I've mimimised the data transfer, optimizing the picture, as well as taking down Chopper Reads The Weather. Fingers crossed things settle before the end of the month.
Does anyone know what happens if you exceed your limit? Typepad goons probably won't come calling, but is there some other sort of nasty retribution they may exact? Is there even a chance this esteemed organ of record will go belly up?
Note: Organ + belly = tummy banana. As I said - esteemed.
'bandwidth' is one of those terms that evolved from the original usage. Back when network engineers used frequency modulation to send data within a specific band of frequencies, the bandwidth was an accurate term for how much you could send -- well before 1994. As date-transmission technologies changed it got carried over, but still referred to the data transfer rate on a connection. Now though, it has been adopted by companies who don't know better to refer to the total data transfer of a user, and has nothing to do with the connection size, or the frequency bands the line uses.
Not sure what typepad does. Most places increase the monthly fee for going over the usage limits, either at a penalty rate, or by calling you and putting you on the gold-plated expensive plan. Or they'll just cut you off.
Posted by: Russ | 16 February 2006 at 14:15
A-ha. Superb stuff, Russ.
From now on I'm going to fill my car up with 'steam'.
I'm already on the gold-plated plan, so I might just send them an email asking what their prices are for increased bandwidth. Although, I hope I don't have to bother forking out.
Posted by: Tony.T | 16 February 2006 at 15:23
bold prediction: you will start blogging about paypal donation buttons
Posted by: girtbysea | 16 February 2006 at 15:23
I will not!
Not this week, anyway.
Posted by: Tony.T | 16 February 2006 at 15:30
Posted by: girtbysea | 16 February 2006 at 15:44
well that was a big fuckin waste of effort.
Posted by: girtbysea | 16 February 2006 at 15:45
Yes, I agree. Well put.
Posted by: Tony.T | 16 February 2006 at 15:45
you killed two birds with one stone with that one Tony (or two rabbits with one stubby where I come from)
Posted by: girtbysea | 16 February 2006 at 15:47
Use shorter words and more abbrv.?
Ask commenters to keep it under 15 words when
Posted by: Nabakov | 16 February 2006 at 16:48
That's the thing, really. You have to pitch things so you've got a core of regulars who keep it interesting, but not so many that you get a ridiculous bill at the end of the month / your site vanishes in a puff of logic.
Better be really, really boring for the next two weeks, just to be sure.
Posted by: carneagles | 16 February 2006 at 17:27
If you exceed your limit, the usual punishment is your website is replaced with a nice blank page reading "bandwidth limit exceeded".
You could always come over to the dark side, Tone. Gravett.org blogs have no bandwidth limit.
Posted by: Yobbo | 16 February 2006 at 19:46
"Better be really, really boring for the next two weeks, just to be sure."
Okey-dokey, one GrogFlog about Ingmar Berman coming up shortly.
Posted by: Nabakov | 16 February 2006 at 22:54
The counter ticks over at a fair rate of knots, but it's only us 'old familiars' that write in the comments box. I think some of the 'lurkers' could put their hands up and at least say hello or something.
That Gareth Parker now, I bet he's still lurking about. Keeps stum a lot though.
Posted by: Scott Wickstein | 16 February 2006 at 23:48
Lurking now. Oops, gave myself away!
Posted by: Wicking | 17 February 2006 at 11:06
Am not lurking Wicky. Why, I never read the AGB.
Posted by: Gareth | 17 February 2006 at 13:55
A-ha! Lurkers.
Posted by: Tony.T | 17 February 2006 at 14:28
Knew that would flush them out!
Posted by: Scott Wickstein | 17 February 2006 at 16:38
"Flushing a lurker." Now there's a phrase that warrants greater prominence.
Posted by: Tony.T | 17 February 2006 at 17:17
One of the downsides to high-fibre diets is unflushable lurkers.
Posted by: Wicking | 17 February 2006 at 17:46
I have no work to do today either, Tony.
Posted by: Wicking | 17 February 2006 at 17:50
Sorry, lurk a bit.
I also lurk at Yobbo's and Kev Gillet's.
I'm sorry.
Posted by: youcancallmemeyer | 17 February 2006 at 18:00