Just watched King Arthur (Director's Cut). It's hard to imagine this was an improvement. What's one body part being hacked off compared with another? That's mainly what the film amounted to, Arthur and the team slicing up Saxons, and Keira Nighty in wode. But it's a bit rich, don't you think, for a movie released in 2004. Shouldn't a little more time pass? It would give the director a chance to reflect on things, or develop a drinking problem, at the very least. How long can it be until first release fillums are labelled Director's Cut?
Still, it gave me an idea. If bigtime film people can change their gazillion dollar projects because they don't like the way the claret splatters, why can't I change my posts? There is no reason, is there.
So, at the risk of being labelled a fractious auteur, here is yesterday's post which had been butchered after producers read the rough cut. It incorporates ALL that legendary stolen lost footage and the second pun in the title which market research deemed laugh-lite:
Sox Offiender (Director's Cut)
People complain a little too much about socks worn with sandals. Do you know why that is so? Well, I will tell you why that is so. It is because they are boring, and most likely bloggers.
Better, don't you agree.
The Director should be cut
Posted by: Francis Xavier Holden | 11 January 2006 at 16:41
The Director's Half-Cut. Obviously.
Posted by: Wicking | 11 January 2006 at 16:47
Cut that out!
In news just in: I've got a digital set-top box. Channel 2 clear as day. Hot stuff, what.
Posted by: Tony.T | 11 January 2006 at 17:32
Yeah... No. Really.
Posted by: anne | 11 January 2006 at 19:02
Yeah... No? You ever played football here, Anne?
Posted by: Tony.T | 11 January 2006 at 19:07
I didn't have any FTA reception, so had to pay $80p.m. for fifty channels of shit. Over Xmas (who was X, anyway?) I bought a STB. I should have done a bit of investigating; it needed a terrestrial antenna to receive a signal. Oops.
I bought a satellite STB on Monday for only five times the price of the terrestrial unit, so now I have FTA. Yay for me.
Posted by: Dirk Thruster | 11 January 2006 at 19:29
Any bloopers come with that? Or do the socks and sandals suffice?
Posted by: pat | 11 January 2006 at 19:31
I got a TV digital /analogue tuner + FM for my son's PC for xmas.(and yeah it was for me to record stuff)
All it does is reboot when I use the software for anything - haven't even seena bit of TV yet - let alone recorded any digital or otherwise. It's going back to my local chineses shop on morrow.
Posted by: Francis Xavier Holden | 11 January 2006 at 20:33
How long can it be until first release fillums are labelled Director's Cut?
Already happened. Well, sort of. Here in Britain, upon the DVD release of the critically-bashed Alexander, the public were presented immediately with the choice of both the theatrical version and the Director's Cut, meaning the theatrical version didn't have time to fail. In some ways, I have to say I view this as something of an improvement upon the behaviour of people like George Lucas, who has taken to fiddling around with 30-year old films in order to make them 'fit' their modern-day sequels.
Posted by: Steve | 11 January 2006 at 22:41
I especially liked the bit where the director got 209 death threats from Hello Kitty fans.
Posted by: carneagles | 12 January 2006 at 00:33
It just isn't his socks.
http://wherearemysocks.blogspot.com/2006/01/going-to-territory.html
Posted by: peemil | 12 January 2006 at 06:42
HELLO KITTY VIRUS SPREADING
Washington: A new and dangerous mutation in the Hello Kitty virus has been confirmed in Australia.
The AGB-N1 strain of the virus is unexpectedly spreading from socks to cars.
Already endemic in many Asian countries, Hello Kitty has killed at least 70 people since 2003.
So watch out.
Posted by: Wicking | 12 January 2006 at 09:51
And guess what? I am the only person with the vaccine. I haven't taken it yet, mind, I'm hoarding it out of spite.
The Set Top Box Rox! Here in Tigerland the reception is dismal. Virtually no picture on SBS or ABC and doddgy on Ten. Only Nine and Seven were good. Now though?!? Sen! Sational! All round!
Posted by: Tony.T | 12 January 2006 at 15:22
so pleased you will be able to enjoy Creature Comforts at 9pm on Ch2.
Have all you pre-2005 bloggers already done posts on the legendary Hello Kitty laptop first seen at slashdot ?
Posted by: Brownie | 12 January 2006 at 22:37