BOOK NAKED

With the Victorian government stripping back reading in school (Vic Lit?) there has been an accidental corollary - a surge of interest in the naked lady business.

Comments

[Tony.T]

Tasteless, you say? Hate mail to the usual address then.

[Paul.M]

Is she reading A Tale Of Two Tities?

[Tony.T]

King Leer.

[BourbonBird]

Accidental?

[Tony.T]

What's that, BB? You reckon the Vic Govt have plunged our magic beans into the sex industry?

[DJ]

The Cunt Of Monte Christo.

[Tony.T]

The Origin of Faeces. It's a shithouse book.

[DJ]

Gear and Clothing in Las Vegas.

-- A biting satire on fashion and gambling.

[Tony.T]

Watcher In The Rye.

-- A scathing critique of the perve mentality. With farming.

[BourbonBird]

Throws a whole new spin on Blume's 'Freckle Juice.'

[BourbonBird]

Voltaire's thrushalicious with Candida.

[Tony.T]

Or Beauty And The Yeast.

[kath]

Withering Tights

The tradgedy of unrestrained hosery

[Paul.M]

Yeast Of Eden.

A Vege-mighty Wind. Well it IS yeast!

[kath]

Bugger, that would be a tragedy.

I blame too many wines and not enough food at Friday luncheon.

[Tony.T]

The Naked Luncheon.

[hungbunny]

Michael Jackson: The Magic and the Madness.

[kath]

We remained fully clothed today Tony, but you know that for you....

[Republic of Mancunia]

Gary Glitter: Young love
(should kill him to be fair)

[Republic of Mancunia]

Geoff Boycott: My way or no way bitch

Phil Mcfadden: Walking the dog towards Love
(with ref to Phils recent outing as a seasoned dogger: if your not sure what 'dogging' is I can explain, if your not sure who Mcfadden is, well do you guys get Eastenders over there? Phil Mitchell)

[Republic of Mancunia]

One more jibe about the cricket
'Winning Test Side Story

[carneagles]

"Fuck this, I'll be a stripper" she says, clutching her book.

Well, if she can fuck that, she'll be a superb stripper.

[kath]

Girls can grind against practically anything with an angle to get a result, books are somewhat superior to many objects, since they come equipped with stiff spines.

[Republic of Mancunia]

so I suppose impotentce could be classed a paperback in the bookworld

[Republic of Mancunia]

One more puurrrllleaaasse.

Gary Glitter, Jonathan King joint venture called
'Silence of the prams' or is that sick

[hungbunny]

Wake me up when he's gone, someone.

[Republic of Mancunia]

Ha Ha Its nice to know I got up your southern Hemispere nose hugs. I will endeaver as always to piss you off to the maximum my abilities will allow

[hungbunny]

Southern hemisphere? Has it crossed your mind that your comments might be boring to English people too?

[Republic of Mancunia]

It had not crossed my mind, but if it makes you feel better, Northern Hemisphere nose aswell, I really could not give a fuck you pompus twat, junt 9 of M60 now and I will make you sit in the car and bore you to death with my ongoing tales of the great Manchester United side of years gone by.
The reason for your comments are probably due to the fact you have Gary Glitters greatest hits at home in your alphabetically organised LP collection and shed a tear when he was sent down for kiddie-fiddling. We have CD's now, flares have been in and out of fasion again twice since you first had them. You also probably thought Mr King was a top DJ, well why don't you fuck off to Cambodia with the rest of your filth

[Republic of Mancunia]

Bet you lot are loving this!!!!England V England and I bet we still get beat

[Republic of Mancunia]

Bet you lot are loving this!!!!! England V England and we will still probably get beat

[hungbunny]

Sorry about using your blog as a boxing ring, Tony, but this cunt needs bringing down a peg or two.

Listen, you fucking northern monkey. I spent seven years at school in Manchester and the IRA bomb was the best thing to ever happen there. I have never had flares, I own precisely NO LPs, and I'm bored to death already without your wittering on about a sport that is only played by pretty boys and rapists. Now try and exercise some self-restraint and only say things that are worth saying, rather than posting every little bit of badly-constructed English that pops into your underdeveloped provincial brain.

[Republic of Mancunia]

Thats about right coming from an arrogant southern shite like you! As it happens I enjoy cricket slightly more than football due to the fact the sport has not sold its soul.
As for the IRA bomb yes you are correct as we have had numerous billions of pounds invested since and we now live in a cultural city not an industrial cess-pit
As for the example,poor choice, should we ask Jon Ball's dad if thinks IRA bombs are good, or how about the famlies of the victims of Omargh.
So how about you show a bit of self-restraint and when you are posting your word perfect messages spare a thought for what you are using as an example.
Maybe use New York, or maybe Bali next? Tell you what Iraq had a bad day yesterday, why not tell them really it was the best thing ever to have happened. Typical prick using shite like that to get a point across.
What ever happened to 'fuck off you northern twat,you are pissing me off' to which I would reply 'no fuck you, you southern cunt and go and jump in the thames' to which you reply 'no, go fuck yourself and go get shot in moss-side'. Get the picture, insults are fun and you do not need to use poor examples to get your point across.
As for my english, yes you are correct it is poor, as for your integrity see you hell knob cheese.
Have I touched a nerve with my ref to you liking Gary Glitter, as for flares, I have a snazzy pair of jeans at the moment that are flared.
Anyway come on lets make up 'do you wanna be in my gang,my gang,my gang

[hungbunny]

"Fuck off you northern twat, you are pissing me off" is slightly unimaginative, not to mention an understatement. And don't lecture me on insults, you who posted a wog joke on this site the other day. I don't care if your wife is half-black, that's like saying "some of my best friends are gay" as you vote in favour of Clause 28. Your obsession with Gary Glitter and sport indicates that you are a tabloid reader, which would explain everything.

[Republic of Mancunia]

No I read both, I read broadsheet for my own satisfaction(even with my poor english) and I read the soaraway Sun so I can find out what the lads on the site are talking about, as it helps me to manage them.
As for gay people, well, none of my best friends are gay, as for Gay Glitter it was not just tabloids that reported his arrest.With ref to wogs, I do have numerous black friends and it was Danny (who is black for the record) who sent me that as a joke via text.
Malcom X, Martin Luther King, Cassius Clay saying 'no vietnamese ever called me nigger' shows I have a respect for black history, the joke was not intended as rascist,merely as a joke.
Did you know a famous black person once kept a photo of a young black person who was from the deep south. Well he was beaten to death by a white person as he looked at the white persons daughter,while being beaten the white person was saying ' no nigger is looks at my daughter' I define that as rascist.
Did you know that wog comes from gollywog and is merely a term to describe something that resembles something else.Making an old black women or heavily pregnant woman stand on the bus because she is black, I define that as rascist.If you truely understood the concept of racism and what it means to a black person then you would not be going on from your ivory tower.
I have a contact for al-queda if you wish to carry on with your obsession of bombs.
You could hang out with Bin Laden and sing 'I'm the leader,the leader I'm the leader of .....

[hungbunny]

I mentioned the word "bomb" once - does that make it an obsession? You, on the other hand, have mentioned Gary Glitter in almost every piss-poor statement you've made. I'd make a pot and kettle comment except your warped mind would probably construe it as racist.

For the record, the origin of the term "wog" is disputed. But I quote from Wikipedia: It is generally considered unwise to use it in modern Britain without expecting an extreme reaction.

[Republic of Mancunia]

OK you got me, I am but a poor developer of land, whose english is crap, I am rascist, and yes I run the Gary Glitter fan club.
Lets call a truce you are highly intelligent judging by your use of words and I am not
I have nothing of interest to say, and I truly apologize to your far greater understanding of the modern world.
You are not obsessed by bombs and I am wrong for saying so, I am also homophobic.
I am northern and you are from the south where the sun shines a lot more than my lttle part of the world.
I also have my bread delivered by bike by a young boy and instead of a paper round which most of southerners did as kids, us notherners cleaned chimneys.....

[hungbunny]

Your woeful attempt at sarcasm is a cop-out. Never mind, Tony will be getting up soon and he'll probably call us both a couple of cunts. I'm off to get drunk.

[Republic of Mancunia]

I'll join you, they will take the piss though, hey I thought that was a good attempt.
Where abouts in the golden isle are you from

[edward]

I come in here to make a rational comment about young girls stripping, and this is what I find. Good day!

[Rob]

You are not northern you cunt, you are from the midlands.

[Darlene]

Heavens, boys take it outside.

Aren't we commenting on a little girl planning her future?

[BourbonBird]

Shit. I thought we were talking about yeast.

[Tony.T]

Fuck, is that all? I want more. You ARE a couple of cunts!

[Tony.T]

Note to self: do more stripper posts.

Carry on.

[Scott Wickstein]

Yeah, fight, fight, you bastards. I hate peace.

[pat]

But being an Oz blog I believe "wog" is an acceptable term. Being called convicts is ok as well, in my case it is true, my ancestor arriving as a result of the Irish uprising of 1798. And as far as you poms arguing please remember that all poms are known as "ankles" i.e. 3 feet below a cunt.

[pat]

Whoops, that should read " 3 feet *beneath* a cunt." Didn't want to ruin the impact of such an excellent joke.

[Tony.T]

Wicky: When does the bell go to start Round 1 at the Ramsgate Tavern?

Pat: Champain stuff. Commedy gold, in fuct.

[Republic of Mancunia]

Edward, from the north west me mate.Your obviously from some far flung outpost like carlisle, or northumberland
And or those calling me a cunt, well I cant be as a cunt is useful.

[kath]

More talk of nuding up generally please Tony.

Also, my nerdy and somewhat disturbing crush has resulting in AGB being first on Google for 'cunting Ford.'

I hope the cunting Ford appreciates that.

[Tony.T]

I've been to Carlisle; hideous bloody place.

[Republic of Mancunia]

But if you went south west to the lakes for about 100 miles,stunning is the only word to describe it, only problem with Lake District is the in-breeding, ie I met a girl and she said this is my mum,sister,cousin,auntie and grandma but there was only one woman there, 3 eyes, four arms, and a second nose are the norm there.
Believe there is an area not to far from Oz which is known for in-breeding (teeing you up here tony for a dig at you nearest and dearest neighbours)

[Republic of Mancunia]

And thats not Mrs Smith from no 38

[Republic of Mancunia]

Kath, just tried cunting ford, I am disturbed how you thought of trying that search.
Care to explain?

[kath]

It's no wonder you confuse which hemispheres people come from Bollocksboy, if you haven't read any of the sexy brained Tony's previous posts before coming and abusing all and sundry and alleging, quite wrongly, that this blog is a haven for the kind of cheap and racist comments you seem to excel in.

You really are on the wrong blog aren't you.

[Tony.T]

Our whipping boys (and girls) in that department are the Tasmanians. When doing attendances at sports events they do a head count then divide by two.

You are right, Kath. Top of the table for Cunting Ford. No show on the Nude Ford, though. But back at No.1 with nerdy crush.

[Tony.T]

Oooo! Sexy brained, me. If a little heavy in the cheap stereotype department.

[Tony.T]

Now come on! Own up. Who was searching for this?

[Dirk Thruster]

I've been to Carlisle; hideous bloody place.
I had a girlfriend from Carlisle. She was a stunner.
Obviously not a product of her environment.

[kath]

You'll never be a cheap stereotype to me Tony, or even a cliche, but you will remain my nerdy crush.

But if I say 'nude Tony' enough in your comments, and get you to number one, will there be a picture?

Nude Tony
Nude Tony
Nude Tony
Nude Tony
Nude Tony
Nude Tony
Nude Tony
Nude Tony
Nude Tony
Nude Tony
Nude Tony
Nude Tony
Nude Tony

*crosses fingers*

[Brett Pee]

Carlisle gets flooded quite often doesn't it ? Saw a picco of their footie stadium under water.

[pat]

Could Vaughny's Bollocks be the Mancunian Candidate? A pommy sleeper programmed here in Oz and sent back to the old dart to cause massive shame and humiliation on Ozzie demand.*

*this is a coded message which Vaughny has been programmed to react to.

[Tony.T]

That's one hottie, but not too much else famous out of Carlisle.

England's Number One: Great Adventures of a Serial Soccer Yob maybe.

[kath]

Arrrgh.

Naked Tony.

Needed to say naked Tony.

Need to see naked Tony (not Danza).

Need to put all thoughts of naked sexy brained Tony T out of mind and get a grip.

[edward]

"Edward, from the north west me mate.Your obviously from some far flung outpost like carlisle, or northumberland"

Hmm.I actually live in Brixton. You'd like it here :|

[hungbunny]

Apologies Tony, it was a crap fight in the end. A bit like one of those heavyweight bouts where a few punches are thrown and then they start hugging each other. Ugh.

"Ankle", I like that. Although the word suggests something delicate and slender, whereas the truth is more like http://health-pictures.com/images/Elephantiasis.jpg>this.

[carneagles]

Carlisle's a bit of a dump but it's gentrifying furiously at the moment. It's getting all the overflow from people who can't afford to live in Victoria Park but wouldn't be seen dead in Rivervale.

[Boudica Of Suburbia]

Hung gets my vote. You should do a popularity poll.

xxB

[SB]

Slight points decision to hung, but they are both juvenile twats. Still their banter was better than the perverted premise of this post.

And what kind of sicko wants to see Tony naked?

_

[Mr Modest]

Not me, that's for sure.

[Republic of Mancuunia]

Sorry Edward, that post was meant for Rob who claims manchester is in the midlands, well no intrest to me really,just pointing out it is in the North West.
As for Brixton, well I have fond memories of the Brixton Academy in 1988, jibbing the train to London and then making it to the Academy to see the Stone Roses, great gig.
Kath, I do look at other threads (black ford) oh no!!! I am rascist I have mentioned the word black, go and roll a big reefer, put some tunes on, chill out
Hung, really do not have any energy left for you, please leave me alone as I have said, you are far better than me, and your educated arse shites all over my council estate upbringing
Pt- Are you a sheep? Do you always jump on a bandwagon? Before you retaliate, anything you say, fuck off
Tony thanks for the memories,great site,sledging was great while the cricket was on, but it's not my cup of tea as these people are a bit to far up their own arse for my taste!!!!
And yes rejoice,rejoice,rejoice and all the bollocks that you sarcastic fingers will now type, heres an idea for the british bloggers, get of your computer, travel round Britains coast (paticulary Northumberland) and appreciate the world around around you, it beats looking at a computer screen.
As for the Aussies, hold your thumb in a horizontal position with the finger next to it in the verticval position, hold that to your forehead and you have 'L' for loser, which sums up your cricket team really.
Good area shane, Bowling Warney and all that!!! See you in 15 months

[pat]

He came into my life like a breath of fresh air and now he leaves as suddenly as he came. Parting is such sweet sorrow. I'll miss Vaughny's Bollocks.

[Tony.T]

Well, that's it then. I am the best, and all the rest of you are swine.

[Vaugnys swollen scrotum]

pt, your kind words touch me, thankyou.
Tony do you teach at Monash Uni?
If you do, I feel very sorry for Mrs Tone if the photo is anything to go by. Now I am no oil painting but jeez, if I were in a pub full of totty I would definatly stand next to you all night.
If it is you,bet you are grateful for phrases such as 'never judge a book by its cover' and 'it's the personality that counts'.
I am back with avengence, rising from the ashes like a fucking massive phoenix,on a mission to piss everyone off to the max, paticulary 'Kath 'the black persons choice', oh shit vaughny you rascist twat you said black again, and the intolerable ' Hungbunny the southern slayer' I coming after both of you with more nukes than an Iranian Chip Shop
DING DING ROUND 2 LET BATTLE COMMENCE

p.s Tone, scan on your name and melbourne on google and its the first option, if it is you ,the above blog is only a joke ( but trust me there are a few prayers on this side of the globe for you)

[Tony.T]

Vaughny, I am lost.

[Vaughnys swollen scrotum]

Tony taylor melbourne, enter that into google, select the first link and a picture of a Tony Taylor comes up (who looks like a cross between Gollum and ET), Whe n you said melbourne was your fav oz city I thought to scan on Tony Taylor Melbourne on google and this horror of someone who teaches at monash uni came up. You said you were a teacher so I put 2 and 2 together and made 9.45 by the state of confusion in your last blog

[kath]

Lookout Hungbunny!

Bollocksboy is back and he's planning to overcome us with garbled nonsensical ramblings from a small damp room in the North.

Hide me Tony.

[Tony.T]

What's that? Give you a hiding? Kinky.

[kath]

*dons PVC outfit and waggles arse at Tony*

[Tony.T]

Where's your purple skivvy?

Oh, right - waggles.

[carneagles]

Orright! Don't forget to use a book in some way.

[kath]

You really are kinky, what if I changed the words to Big Red Car to suit the cunting Ford?

[Tony.T]

Or little red wagon. As in fix your. RRRRRRRRRRR.

[kath]

You can fix it, yes you can.

[kath]

Sorry Tony, went off on a little Bob the Builder tangent there.

He's a slightly better perversion than the Wiggles, Bob's got his own tools.

[Vaughny]

Kath, how did you know my room was damp???
I prefer Wendy to Bob obviously, but I do have a strange fetish for scoop

[bruce]

I love Gary Glitter! Noone ever stops to think that he has never been convicted of abusing anyone.

So what did he do wrong? He owned some photos of young girls with their clothes off? big deal.

All over the world the age of concent and the deffinition of art is differeent.

What gives one person the right to decide what is art and what is pornography?

I think sleeping with someone over the age of 40 is gross, should it be illigial? should it be illigael to own photos of naked humans over the age of 40?

What about animals? naked animals ...thats what we all are. Should it be illeagal to own a naked animal? I think so!

[Tony.T]

Eeee Gadd!

[carneagles]

Oh, come on. Come on!

[Tony.T]

Ooo. Now there's a coincidence. Good work, Carna.

[Innomen]

You'll love what I did with the image above, find the essay entitled "Marriage has cost us the cure for cancer."

[Snaz75.com]

This is GREAT!!! She is probably looking at one of our catalogs.... www.snaz75.com

[Harrison]

Dr. Seuss books turn small girls into strippers, there's our proof.