BOOT UP URANUS

Boynton was just reading out the horoscopes from The Australian. The Stars aren't strictly my cup of tea; they're a great steaming pile of nonsense, if you ask me.

"July 6 to 23 is amazing for rebooting conviviality. Meanwhile, Uranus is zooming backwards through your house of love."

Mind you, that is quite the pearl; you really can't say fairer.

Comments

[Clem Snide]

The best horoscope ever, in Sydney's "Daily Telegraph" from at least a decade ago if memory serves correctly, was a simple: "Sorry, it was cloudy". Some spoilsport (obviously a Sagittarius) wrote in to the letters section pointing out that the astrologist could have looked up the stars' position in an ephemeris. The astrologer replied asking how he could possibly see the stars if it was cloudy, avoiding the issue somewhat.

[Brett Pee]

The only thing i will be rebooting is my computer. And i don't give a damn if Uranus is rising in the ascendancy giving me potential joy for the following week. The whole thing is designed for idiots and is 'forecast' by total idiots. But there are, worryingly, folks out there who believe every last bloody word of 'em. Jeez.

[Francis Xavier Holden]

I'd be worried if my anus was zooming backwards - even if it was in "The House of Love", baby.

[Dorian]

I'm sorry to hear it Tony. Maybe try a different newspaper.

[Tony.T]

Think I'll just give it a miss, thanks Dorian. Don't want to inflame my ephemeris; I hear it's a painful condition.

[BourbonBird]

My (ex)mother-in-law is a big believer of those horoscope things. She says that they really apply to her and the people she cares about when she reads them...

Then again, she's a complete nutbag.

[SB]

I'm a Gemini. All geminis are bisexual. What is worse, I'm married to a Sagittarius, and they are all murderers.

[Tony.T]

I bet you drive a Gemini.

I am a Sagittarius, too. What you say is correct. Sadly, they only ever let me out of here with an escort.