"He smashed his car on Saturday night," remarked fellow teacher Jake yesterday. Jake was talking about one of our hoons. "No surprise there," I said, "no doubt he was driving like a clown. The bloke is a fair dinkum imbo."
"Was."
UPDATE: Let's make one thing crystal clear; especially for those hard of thinking. Becoming a teacher for the holidays is not "joining the profession for the wrong reasons"; it's the only reason. There is bugger all satisfaction to be had from trying to stuff knowledge into the porridge our students laughingly call their brains. And the main challenge is trying not to mock when lazy arseholes fail. Sisyphus, anyone?
VICTORIAN classrooms are under threat from teachers who may have joined the profession for the wrong reasons.
An inquiry found many became teachers because they failed to get into the career of their choice, wanted long holidays or were tired of studying.
Graduate secondary school teachers, in particular, were found to be motivated more by convenience than a desire to work with children.
Ouch. That'll learn him. So was every stinkin' teenager in the joint bawling for their great mate Hoonboy and seeking counselling and shit?
Posted by: The Hack | 01 March 2005 at 12:49
The one student I mentioned it to just shrugged and said "Yeah? He was a fuckwit, you know. What sort of car was he driving?"
Posted by: Tony.T | 01 March 2005 at 13:23
In Sydney we had two deaths when a stolen car crashed and now its riots in the streets, and all the fault of the police for chasing the car theives.
The police should deploy snipers.
Posted by: SB | 01 March 2005 at 18:03
My my, that Hack fellow is a sensitive and caring type, isn't he? I feel sorry for anyone who ever agreed to marry him.
Posted by: Caz | 01 March 2005 at 20:18
"The police should deploy snipers."
And cameras.
"You've seen Death Race 2000 and played Grand Theft Auto! Now feel the power! hear the roar! smell the fumes! savour the bad language! and enjoy the heartstopping action of the real thing! Now on cable, DVD or visit the website www.hoonhellriders.com."
Make sure everyone gets a cut of the revenue stream, get an Annalise Bracknwhatisit to co-host with the guy from "Blokes World", interview George Miller for the broadsheets to keep the chattering classes onside and get the TAB onboard. Everyone wins. Except for the odd claret smear on the asphalt.
It'd make NASCAR look like lawn bowls.
Posted by: Nabakov | 01 March 2005 at 20:28
No one at school seems to be too fussed. The kids are all more interested in the car and mocked the guy for being a sh'ouse driver. The teachers were just surprised it hadn't happened earlier.
We're all numbed out here, anyway. A couple years ago two students mugged and killed an old lady. And you remember that guy who was macheted with a sharpened fence picket in Altona? Yep. Also one of our lads.
It's a tough campus.
Posted by: Tony.T | 01 March 2005 at 21:19
As a teacher in Korea... At least your kids speak English...
Posted by: peemil | 02 March 2005 at 09:04
I'm not sure I'd call what they speak English, peemil. It's more a kind of Pigeon Teenager.
Posted by: Tony.T | 02 March 2005 at 10:30
Will they be playing the bogan funeral song of choice, Gone Too Hoon?
The first verse is particularly apt.
Posted by: Big Ramifications | 02 March 2005 at 15:16
I like a big cock.
Posted by: Hefty Boneshank | 03 March 2005 at 00:20
Sorry: Gone Too Hoon.
Posted by: Big Ramifications | 03 March 2005 at 11:05
Wondered what you were on about, Biggy Boy.
Speaking of Big, I wonder also what's the story with ole Hefty up there.
Posted by: Tony.T | 03 March 2005 at 11:07
um yeah.. what is the story? Well... that sure was a conversation killer... or was the conversation over anyway?
Posted by: AdventureGirl | 05 March 2005 at 06:30
It just started up again, Addy. I dunno what Hefty's story is, but I'm sure there's more to him than merely complaining to the internet (the whole world, in fact) about his tragically small chap.
But I could be wrong.
Posted by: Tony.T | 05 March 2005 at 13:48