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m0nty

Pup wins another toss and puts the Injuns in.

Tony

Will Clarke putting the Indians in here in Perth have the same effect as Ponting sending the Poms in at Edgy in 2005? We better not waste the early going.

Tony

I think I prefer Welcome to Country more than the anthems. Nice work, Doc Walley.

Tony

Excellent AAF too. Clear, simple, no garnish, just right.

Tony

Since this is the WACA, I trust the the groundsman has his hammer ready to "fix" the sightscreen?

Tony

f this is a day 3 pitch, as Tawny says, what would a day 1 pitch have looked like?

Tony

The green, green grass of Gnome.

2BarRiff

I hope leaving Lyon out for Starc will be a master stroke. But I doubt it.

Jonathan

Since Clarke doesn't seem to like bowling Lyon anyway, it can't hurt much.

Soups

The Indian management didn't let the scoreboard operators know Kumar was a chance to be picked. He has no name on the scoreboard. They're probably furiously painting as I type.

Tony

Adios, V-Slog.

1/4.

Sloggy can settle back into the rooms with a long cool beer.

Tony

Soupsy, is Kumar at Number 11? Ho. Ho.

Tony

2 Bar and Jonathon, the WACA pitch has held up for five days over recent years, so anything less than a Warne-like spinner who can take advantage late in the game is nigh on pointless.

Nathan of Perth

Well, time to see if beer-battering is as good for pitches as it is for chips.

Tony

Good to see beer-battering get a run and not the un-PC beer-batsmanering.

Tony

Out: Chappell. In: Brayshaw.

2BarRiff

Was wondering why Chappell was comentating on Indian TV...

Tony

Chappelli's been rotated out for the Perth Test.

Tony

Pitch it up, Koo.

Soups

The scoreboard has Kumar at 8 (in Ashwin's empty space) but crookinfo has him @ 11. Who knows?

Soups

Why is Sids off the ground?
We're only an hour in.

Soups

... And now he's bowling. Pre-spell widdle?

Soups

... And now's he bowled the artist formally known as The Wall for 9. 2/32.

Tony

Siddle bowls Wall-E.

2/32.

When you get bowled on the WACA you know for certain that you have a monkeygate on your back.

The Wall has become The Picket Fence.

The Wall is falling over the ball more than The Ponting.

2BarRiff

Starc dragged after 3 overs?

Tony

Vodafone coverage does not work in Perth, like West Australians.

Tony

Starc bowled some good agates, but more pies.

2BarRiff

But 8 runs off 3 overs with 1 maiden is hardly a Johnson-like spray-fest.

Tony

Only because the batsman could not reach (or did not have to play) so many of Koo Starc's balls.

Tony

The WACA ground staff are drinking beer behind the sight screen.

Tony

TLM PLUMB!

3/59.

If the umpires don't give those, then you may as well remove LBW from the Laws of Cricket for Perth Tests.

chris

Bye Bye TLM - can we organise for him to be dropped for the fourth test - maybe after a failure in the second dig in Perth?

Tony

Goodbye, Gumby.

4/63.

Haddin holds on!

chris

And now Gumby too.

They're hopeless.

Tony

What has Cam Sutherland got to hide? "We don't want to be poking and prodding with people around."

Watch that comment fly.

Tony

The WACA ground staff were merely using stubbies to tap Polyfiller the wicket. No dramas. No worries. Get a dog up ya.

Nathan of Perth

Was saying for years (okay, not really, but it felt like it) that the bowling coach was much to blame for our misfortunes. New bowling coach and all of a sudden the bouncy but otherwise docile pitch is still producing wickets.

Would still like to see Cam Sutherland get down there after stumps and use the stubbies to hammer the chisel into the pitch.

2BarRiff

Cricinfo provided a paragraph I thought I'd never read again:

"It was top bowling from Australia's quicks again. They kept probing away outside off, prompting the mistakes and once again they have given Australia control of the match."

Brings a tear to the eye ...

Tony

Not sure Cooley Dooley ever did much for our bowling. He turned Johnson onto a rolled mud spud. Ever since the Home Porn star took over we have looked heaps better. Who'd have thought piching it up was a good idea, hey. Only had to compare the two attacks from last summer.

Nathan of Perth

Well, the story had been that previous bowling coach didn't believe in swing.

Tony

Funny that Cooley was given the credit for getting the Poms swinging it in 2005, then he comes home and our bowlers barely move it off the straight for the next 5 years. (That includes when McGrath was taking wickets, but he was not a swinger.) I reckon Cooley was the Manchurian bowling coach, sent here to infiltrate our bowling and stuff us up for 2009 and 2010/11.

Tony

Guess it is harder to swing the ball when you are not rubbing lollies into the leather.

Also, Johnson's rubbish ball control (scrambled seam, etc, blah, blah) screwed the ball for the other quicks. We could never bowl as a team with Mitchell bowling pies, wrecking the ball and bleeding runs.

Tony

Surely it's well past time Gnome got into the ABC box to start raving about sensational, magnificent, toughest-fighter-ever Ponting.

Tony

Driving home from work in late 2009 Australia was playing the Windies in Perth and the whole way Gnome B.N. was slurping on about Ponting's fighting spirit. Nauseating.

Tony

E-Kohli caught Cow Corner, bowled P-Siddy.

5/131.

Not a fan of send-offs. Why does Siddle need to give it a huge "FUCK OFF!"?

Vindicate

Anyone know what channel Gem is on the foxtel box?

Tony

It's not on my Foxtel box, but my brother say's it's on HD. I've got it through my digital receiver in the telly.

Nathan of Perth

He wasn't saying "Fuck Off" he was .... umm ... expressing his love for chocolate milk? "Choc yeah?"

Tony

Lindt balls?

m0nty

I'm looking forward to Klutzy and Yakety having a jaw.

The Wall has turned into The Gate.

Tony

Nine is working overtime to play down Groundstaffboozingonthepitchgate.

m0nty

That one was going to hit Kumar's white castle.

Tony

Kumar at Number 8 LBW Koo Starc.

7/152.

Tony

Koo has been threatening an LB like that all day.

Tony

Klutzy: "Welcome to the wicket, Zaheer old chum."

Tony

Kebabs caught Punter bowled Hotel.

8/152.

The Indians are trying to get Australia in while there is still sting in the wicket.

lou

Our top 3 must be feeling nervous.

Tony

The way India have been batting on this tour our top three were nervous when Clarke won the toss and sent India in.

lou

It's a bit pathetic. It's like the Aussies were last summer. The Indian fans must be ripe for murder.

Tony

The effigy factories are working double shifts.

m0nty

How many Australian wickets down by stumps? Over/under is 4.5 I reckon.

m0nty

Collapso Lotto, let's call it.

Tony

At least three, surely.

2BarRiff

Tawny getting stuck in ...

Tony

Yakety Zak gawn slogging.

9/157.

Tawny: "That is such weak batting. Absolutely no guts."

Tony

Instant caught Klutzy, bowled Koo.

All out 161.

Now Australia bats...

bruce

I am starting to feel optimistic about the current and future prospects of the Aussie bowlers.

This is not paper over the cracks. This is paper removed (Hilditch), rot removed (Studsy), existing good plaster cleaned up (Sizz and House) and some new plaster and a bit of spackfiller (Pattinson and Starc) applied. Allow to set, sand off the rough edges and Bob's your Auntie's live in lover.

Tony

Still need a good spinner. Then there's the batting.

Tony

Mind you, Lyon looks handy and is certainly the most promising of the tweakers we've used since Warne.

bruce

I'd rather see the keeper as the next thing to change for the better.

All just a swallow so far - hoping they will turn into a girlfriend.

m0nty

The yarn in the big paper the other day about Studsy saying what a relief it was not to be in the team any more was a joke. Apart from the obvious gag that he can't be as relieved as we all are, what does that say about how he was going, and what he thinks of the team? No self-awareness about how he was damaging the rest of the side. Selfish to the extreme.

Tony

Despite what Studly says, he will struggle to get back, which blessedly puts an end to the ugly 2 year experiment.

Tony

Never seen so many batsmen and bowlers pulling out of their stances and run-ups.

I blame the WACA ground staff and the WACA sight screen.

Usual suspects.

Tony

Tubby just realised the outfield is quick. I realised it was quick when I noticed the ground staff last night had pool cues.

m0nty

Mitchell Johnson is Studsy, TT. Studly is Chad Cornes. Know your studs.

Tony

I thought Studly was Graham Cornes.

m0nty

Chad inherited many things from his dad, that was one of them.

Tony

Here's hoping he does not inherit his father's farcical on-air partnership with KG. Community radio slop.

2BarRiff

Crap, Yadavs worked out the swinging yorker. This could get ugly ...

m0nty

Harsha is enabling Karaoke F in shameless fashion.

Tony

Twitter has spoken:

Crispin

It's like listening to Roy & HG. Funny stuff: "@AfterGrogBlog: Instant caught Klutzy, bowled Koo. All out 161. Now Australia bats..."

Tony

I thought Karaoke had been declared a crime against humanity.

m0nty

Cow Corner is scoring like it's a pyjama affair.

m0nty

Crispin should have heard us on the SGW! Roy & HG were shown up as the antediluvian, Sydney-centric old duffers they are.

Tony

JB is commentating like it's a pyjama affair. I'll swear he thinks Australia must make hay in the first 15 overs, while the field is up.

m0nty

Bit of chirp between Instant and Cow Corner. The dogs are already on the growl.

Tony

Arf.

2BarRiff

That's a welcome to Test Cricket.

m0nty

That was a fair shot by Cow Corner. Shire boys generally lift their game when their blood is boiling from a decent sledge.

Tony

Test20.

Tony

Another 21 runs and Australia avoid the half-follow-on.

m0nty

The dogs are limping.

m0nty

It may look a little char shuney at the moment, but there is more than time enough for Klutzy to lead us to an ignominious Wild Dogs II defeat.

2BarRiff

Cowan made that french cut look almost deliberate ... is it the new reverse sweep?

Tony

Don't be an idiot, Tawny. Your key on-air partner went to private school and was an esteemed Australian captain.

Tony

Morris & Barnes. Simpson & Lawry. Hayden & Langer. Cow Corner & Cowan Corner.

m0nty

Key to getting your tweet displayed on Nine: suck up the arse of the Nine commentators.

Tony

Can't believe Nine would not display my Tweets. They. Are. Gold.

m0nty

Now that's traditional Cow Corner values, a chip shot to cow corner.

Tony

Ha. Ha. Ha. "Didn't carry at the WACA" is like "didn't get drunk in Bali". Suffer in ya jocks.

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