CHUCKTORIA

Paul Keating once said "Never get between a premier and a bucket of money." You can apply the same general thrust, and pejorative colour, to sport: "Never get between a sports administrator and a chance at a premiership."

Muralidaran confirmed starter for Bushrangers

VICTORIA'S domestic cricket campaign will have a distinct subcontinental influence this season, with the Bushrangers to boast a champion Sri Lankan spinner as a player and an Indian property developer as their major sponsor.

I've played a lot of cricket here in Victoria, and know a lot of cricketers. It's fair to say that very few of us think Murali is legal.

Couple that with our recent spin summit:

"There was unanimous agreement that the off-spinner’s ‘other-one’, the doosra, should not be coached in Australia."

Throw in the long-held belief that English cricket – or Mike Atherton's English system - has suffered because it has too many foreign players.

So, what does Victoria do? It imports a player who most everyone thinks chucks; who is the very epitome of the doosra that the gurus have sought to ban; and who, to make it a hat-trick, is foreign.

Yer gaggin', right?

As a passionate follower of Victorian cricket, even the Big Bash - which, ironically, NSW won on the back of the efforts of their own chucker Aaron Bird - I've enjoyed the few wins, and sucked up the many losses. But it's been a long time since I've had my nose rubbed it in with such vigour.

Naturally, Tony Dodemaide was spinning it to within an inch of its bottom line:

"I think this has cracked the boundaries of what state cricket was conceived as being. It's very much now on the international stage … and international companies are interested in being involved with us."

No mention of stakeholders? Lift your game. Translated, what TD is saying is basically "There are pots of loot in it for us, so it's all good."

Not good here. I'll be all over the Shield, as usual, but the KFC Big Chicken can kiss my sharries.

Comments

[RT]

Very sad day for Vic cricket.

The other disturbing aspect of that announcement is that they are bringing out Bravo as well. So two spots are now taken up by internationals, with this Big Bash being the poor old Vic based players only real chance to play in front of half decent crowds. Obviously gonna be the norm for other states as they chase the Indian champions league loot.

Also Dubai-focused property developer Dheeraj and East Coast has taken over the sponsorship from CUB. That crowd sounds synergistic with Victoria...

Cricket with its double standards and compromised administrations sometimes just tires you out. It's gonna be such an unexciting cricketing summer.

[m0nty]

Dodemaide is the best spinner in the country, on that form.

[m0nty]

Speaking of the Bushwhackers, Tone, did you hear Brad Hodge on SEN last night with Chuck Berry accusing the NSW players in the Test team of white-anting him on tour because he was a Victorian?

http://podsentral.com/node/2309

Sounded to me like the interview questions were all pre-planned, with Chuck bowling pies outside off stump and Hodge spanking them through the covers. Then John Buchanan was on this morning and said there was a "modicum of truth" to it.

[Tony]

RT: Wonder if those half decent crowds will now be choc-a-bloc full of the local Shrees.

Mont: While Hodgey seems to cop it from the selectors, I also here that he's about as popular as Dean Jones. In fact, when he first came on the scene he was called Little Deano.

[Tony]

By the way. Is Bravo getting any runs? Is he getting any wickets? Is he even playing?

[m0nty]

Perhaps those rumours are part of that white-anting, Tone. Which came first, NSW mafia tactics or Victorians with a siege mentality?

[Hangover Black]

From http://www.smh.com.au/news/sport/cricket/nsw-bowler-aaron-bird-banned-for-illegal-bowling-action/2009/02/25/1235237714593.html

"Bird was reported by the match umpires in NSW's one-day matches against Queensland on October 18 and South Australia on October 22, as well as the Twenty20 Big Bash final against Victoria on January 24."

Cricket Australia have this wonderful thing called, "Doubtful Bowling Action Procedures, where any bowler who is mentioned by three different umpires in the same season is reported".

I wonder if three different umpires will have the balls to mention Murali this season. Bet there is something in his contract that he can pack his bag and go home on full pay if he does get mentioned.

[Pedro the Ignorant]

Likewise on the KFC Krap, Tony. They won't see any of my hard earned.

Lucky there was nothing breakable in range when I first read about the google eyed chucker playing for Victoria. When I saw it is only that tip and giggle rubbish, I sez to myself, who cares if they chuck the ball, everybody in the crowd is either too drunk to know what is going on or haven't a clue about the Laws of Cricket.

Dodemaide sounds like the late Big Kev; "I'm Excited"!

[Adsy]

Hmm, boo a chucker or cheer a Vic?

I'd like to actually go to a game and see him bowl in the flesh to finally make up my mind. The Vics will have 40,000 at home games now instead of the 2,000-5,000 they used to get last season. I don't really care if he throws it in these games anyway to be honest.

[David Barry]

HB, Aaron Bird has since undergone remedial work and is OK to bowl this summer. It must be a silky smooth action now, because all of his balls were under 15 degrees on the second round of testing.

[Bruce]

I'll be barracking for South Australia this year - only because the Canberra Comets are no more.

I will support the worst team in Australia rather than one of the best if they put that chucking prick into it.

[Tony]

Best to simply ignore it. I can't barrack for one of the other states.

[Adsy]

Might get on the New South bandwagon seeing there's a spot vacated by Hodgey. Surely they have some young keeper or quick or decent bat that will get the nod before any other Vic does, thanks to Lil Deano.

Sounds like a rapper.

[Tony]

Touch wood Lil Deano doesn't start rapping like the CGU beeyotch and all the SEN personnel who have piled on: Lil KB, Big Rita, Notorious Doran, et al.

[m0nty]

My name is Tony
And I write a sporting blog
I crack the cricket funnies
Like Studsy goes the slog

When Australia's not winning
I tend to get the shits
So I get a lot of chances
To call them all fvckwits

Whoever you are... Tony!
Whatever you do... cricket blogger!
We put the U in CGU...

[Tony]

My name is m0n Tee
Footy stats are my thing
I track hard ball gets
Rank clangers on the wing

With Cox in the ruck
I rub my hands with glee
When Chappy did a 'string
I cursed and said fvck me

Whoever you are... m0nty!
Whatever you do... fan footy!
We put the U in CGU...

[m0nty]

St Peter is going to bring this thread up when I die.