Part 1: Look! Oooh! Woww! Ahhh! Crackers.
Received the following corrective E-mail from Bill:
Have you got the right day attached to your Cupdate Updates. For instance today should be Day 6 and not Day 5. I wonder if you're forgetting the Opening Ceremony.
Your point being Bill?
I don't do opening ceremonies. Why? Two reasons.
One, Crackers! Here in Melbourne the opening of a new double-mirrored, metal-plated wine-bar is an excuse for fireworks. They probably had them at Federation Square on Thursday morning. Let's find out from an Intrepid Reporter who was on the spot. No! Whaddaya mean? No!
Down the road from me is Olympic Park. The Melbourne Storm play there and have crackers every second Sunday arvo. That's arvo. Not night. Fireworks in the daytime? What's the point? They'd have them at a vacant OP on away games if they could. They even have them on their website!
Then across the road, not 200 metres from where I type, is the Melbourne Cricket Ground. I'm convinced the only reason The AFL wants to move the Grand Final to Saturday night is so they can have more penny bungers! It's the lure of the Whizz-gablet and the Zzzing-popper. TV rights don't enter into it.
And Two. Big Events! The Oscars, The Grammies, The Golden Globes, The Logies. Nope! Boring! Not even slightly interested.
And what do you get when you combine Big Events and Fireworks? Yes. You guessed it. Opening Ceremonies. That's what! They're even less interesting than slightly interesting. Never forget the evil banality unleashed on humanity by Rick Birch at the S'Siddey Olympics? World, I give you Nicky Webster.
I'm in it for the cricket, the football, the soccer, the motor racing, the baseball, the tiddlywinks. Well, maybe not the motor racing. A parade of past players and a few team photos on the morning of the first match would do me.
Meanwhile I'll continue to watch SBS re-runs of classic Spaghetti Westerns.
Part 2: Well, sort of.
A prize to anyone who can successfully marry the words cricket and blogger. Crogger? Blicketter? Appalling!
Anyhoo, I'm adding one to the AGB links: London Ozblogger, or is that Aussie Lonblogger, Michael Jennings.
But what's this atop his Blog? "You appear to be viewing this blog from Frankston, Australia. Welcome."
Frankston? Do I look like I've been fighting? I think your Global Blogging Sattelite needs a tweak.
I was living in London when the Aussies won the World Cup in 1987. Work the next night was very satisfying. Apropos to that, Michael must have had great fun at work on Thursday.
Part 3: Saturday night at the Tee Vee.
What with all the wine, beer, ribs, cheese and bickies, errrr, I mean dried fruit, rice crackers and mineral water I've had tonight it's obvious; Cricket Blogging = Clogging. Sounds healthy. Is healthy.
Well. Well. Dear old things - All out for 125.
Gill'pie is a gun. Is he the best fast bowler in the world??
Why go to Oprah or Maury Povich when our very own help line, Gabbin' With Grog, provides all the answers you're ever likely to need. Answers to significant questions such as this one from Anonymous at Google.
Well, Anonymous, I think I can help you there. My well-placed sources inform me it was something along the lines of; "See you in court White C***!"