And another thing. Can people - and by people I mean pinheads who prefer the sound of their own rhetoric - please stop droning on about the IPL player auction. "When I heard about the hideous indignities at the IPL slave market, I choked on my larks tongues." Just shut up. Since when did slaves have a choice? Since when were slaves given big money for their work? It's no slave market. There was no indignity. There was just a bunch of highly skilled, willing participants ready to accept a lot of wonga for their services in an open and transparent bidding system. Pity it doesn't spread to the AFL.
Mark has more:
There have been a series of predictably snarky comments, both on the crystal box and in the chip wrappers, about the amount of money cricketers will earn from the IPL.
I think you're just offended because a player auction is the only way Melbourne will win another flag...
Posted by: nick | 27 February 2008 at 12:51
Dunno about that. A player auction would see Wet Toast, the Cows, Eddiewood and the Carlton Crew scooping all the good players while Melbourne spent millions on hacks and crocks.
Posted by: Tony T | 27 February 2008 at 13:00
The Crows would need every cent just to get a team on the park - and then more $ to supervise the idiots afterwards (yes, Rhett, I mean you), Eddie's gang have been spending like drunken sailors for years with little result, Carlton have surely bought Judd's soul, and Wet Toast will be paying players on a 'barter' system...Melbourne just need a 'steady hand on the tiller' - maybe JWH could come out of retirement for them?
Posted by: nick | 27 February 2008 at 14:38
Also the monkey / monkey grinder analogy and associated gnashing of teeth. "Oh noes! They might have to turn up to some sponsors nosh ups and schmooze and talk to people and stuff. Oh the humidity!!!"
No worse that the poor kiddies who have to jump thru hoops to join the Nutra Grain surf series. Or just about any other sponsored series you can think of. And on 100 times the coin.
I'd schmooze nude for that money. Shut the fuck up all of you.
Posted by: Big Ramifications | 27 February 2008 at 15:57
Nutri Grain surf series? Does that still go around?
Posted by: Tony T | 27 February 2008 at 19:35
There's nothing I'd love more than a whole lot more Wonga. Mmm mmmmmm. Or, as we like to say, "woop woop"!
Posted by: Willy Wonga | 27 February 2008 at 19:59
What happened to "coo coo"?
Posted by: Tony T | 27 February 2008 at 20:15
Come to think of it. Does anyone still eat Nutri Grain? I can remember when Tony Grieg was spruiking the "little cricket bats with holes" and everywhere you went they were on the breaky table. But I don't remember anyone actually liking the tasteless little dried cardboard blobs.
Posted by: Tony T | 27 February 2008 at 20:18
Coo coo is old skool cuz. Get wid de flo bro!
Posted by: Willy Wonga | 27 February 2008 at 20:53
The cricket bats with holes are still big on our breaky menu. I don't eat them of course but the kids love em. I'm more Coco Pops, cause they're coco-licious.
Posted by: pat | 27 February 2008 at 20:57
Oh no, Tones. You obviously don't understand that capitalism sucks the free will from the human soul. What kind of fascist teachers college did you go to?
Posted by: Murph | 27 February 2008 at 20:59
I can remember when Tony Grieg was spruiking the "little cricket bats with holes"
Correct me if I'm wrong, but the ad went something like:
[Tawny Greig and Greg Chappell are playing golf. Tawny tees off]
Greg: "Nice one Greiggy, that'll be four."
Tawny: "No way, chum. Six."
Er. Unless it was for a completely different product. The ad certainly existed.
Posted by: Big Ramifications | 27 February 2008 at 21:44
Willy: Gotcha. Speaking of strange language... at school today the students had never heard "cutting laps".
Pat: What sort of doting parent feeds their kids? Talk about spoilt. The king of cereals.
Murph: I wear a black shirt to union rallies. Then check out stock prices. Afterwards I eat vegetarian. It's all about balance.
Biggy: I reckon that's it. And at the end Greg says to Grieg: "Just like a shit milkshake, only crunchy."
Posted by: Tony T | 27 February 2008 at 21:55
Point of order Mr Speaker....
It's "brekky", not "breaky". Breaky looks like it should be pronounced "brake-y" and that's just plain wrong.
I'm willing to write to the BCCI, CA, the ICC, Peter Roebuck AND the Surf Lifesaving Assocation on this point, I'm just THAT het up about it!!!!
Posted by: Carrot | 27 February 2008 at 22:17
If I misunderstand correctly, brekky is Hindu for monkey.
Posted by: Tony T | 27 February 2008 at 22:19
Sorry to nitpick, but for the umpteenth time in my life ...
A 'Hindu' is an adherent of Hinduism. The language is 'Hindi'.
Posted by: Boo | 27 February 2008 at 22:46
So: is brekky Hindi for monkey then?
(Actually, I thought it was Punjabi for...)
Posted by: 13th Man | 28 February 2008 at 00:19
No, it's Gujarati for 'm*f*ing monkey'. :)
Posted by: Boo | 28 February 2008 at 00:42
I am amused by Symonds comments that he won't tour Pakistan because of the safety issie.
In the IPL he is with what side? Does he have any idea of the huge foot he has put into his mouth.
No wonder Stewy isn't liked in the Aussie team.
He can actually think.
Yes I saw those commercials for nutrigrain
Posted by: Bring Back CL's blog | 28 February 2008 at 09:29
And to answer a question from way back, yes, the Nutri Grain series is still on. I accidentally watched it the other weekend and saw wide ass Naomi Flood break thru to win her first ever race.
I'm amused that the lasses spend a lot of time adjusting their togs while racing. And I'm amused that someone can be so bloody fit and still be a wobble bottom.
Speaking of jumping thru hoops. Surf iron woman Hayley Bateup has joined TVs Gladiators because she was told to jump thru one too many hoops if she wanted to join the latest series, so she told 'em to take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut. Nutri Grain or Uncle Toby's or something else I don't know.
Where's Patrick Smith shrieking about this one, eh?
Posted by: Big Ramifications | 28 February 2008 at 11:44
Nothing wrong with a wobble bottom I say. As Spinal Tap sang The bigger the cushion, the sweeter the pushin
I've a strong sense of Deja Vu on this. Sorry if I repeat myself.
Posted by: pat | 28 February 2008 at 13:13
Yes I saw those commercials for nutrigrain
There was an old send up of the 'Duncan' song which went:
"I love to have a beer with Greigy
South Africa's favourite son
Griegy brought the Nutri Grain
And everyone got the runs."
As far as the cricketers go they aren't so much slaves as high priced whores.
Posted by: SB | 28 February 2008 at 14:26