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And I'll get very mad if one of yooz says anything along the lines of "Why would the Strayan have a disclaimer banning relatives of Kellogg's employees"?

But only very mad.

Looks like they might be biased toward Rodney of Armadale.

Dearest Tony,

I consider myself to possess at least below average intelligence, yet I have never really managed to figure out the cryptic crossword (albeit without ever putting a great deal of effort in).

But now, even with the questions and answers on full display, I can make neither head nor tail of the infernal puzzle.

How the fuck do you do these things?

Can I have a hint? How does "Heroin apt to destory sportsman" equal "Ian Thorpe"? And how does one sensibly arrive at "mistress" from the "clue": "Rules but taking mistress finally abdicates"?


( ... or even arrive at "resigns", rather than "mistress". See! It's nonsensical!)

B: As it happens, I didn't know Rodney (the admiral) was from Armadale, except to know it was a Perth suburb. But he is.

G: it works this way.

"Heroin apt to destory sportsman"

"Heroin apt" is destoried; in other words, it is an anagram. Anagram of what? Anagram of Ian Thorpe, a "sportsman".

"Rules but taking mistress finally abdicates"

"Rules" = reigns. "Taking mistress finally" means you incorporate the last letter of mistress, S. Thus, reigns incorporates s to give resign, or "abdicate".

The thing about AGB is I know I'll always see something that I never ever imagined I would see.

Can't help showing a completed cryptic on a blog is vaguely in the "getting a root and going down the pub and telling your mates about it" category. Not totally convinced though.

"Phwoar, that's a lovely grid vicar!"

There is a most definitely a touch - grope? - of the "getting a root and going down the pub and telling your mates about it", but I'm really just telling the world the answers before the closing date. It's my spitey riposte to The Oz for not giving me the prize.

At least, that's the way I spin it. What's good for the Collingwood goose is good for the AGB goose.

New contract addendum for all AFL players : Do 3 cryptic crosswords a week. That should keep them out of trouble.

nick: ... and keep 'em all out of the game as well.

onya Tony. If Maxwell Newton was still running The Australian you would have won their stupid bloody dictionary by now.

... and re
"Phillip Adams probably uses his to prop up a sarcophagus"

- when it isn't propping up his oesophagus.

Theres a piece of your mind you don't need? Ask around first.

N: Doing the giant crossword in People ought to keep them out of trouble. Or easy Sudokus.

(Sorry, Age readers, gentle Sudokus. Ponces!)

B: Who's Max Newton, and why would he be favourably disposed to my entry?

FX: Yeah, I don't need the cerebrum-brum-brum. The part that deals with interest in motor cars.

Hi guys, thanks for the link, but I'm a bit bemused to see we're under the sports category. As much as I love a bit of male rough-and-tumble-and-grabarse, we're not a sports blog.

Sorry, John, a mix up in the listing. I meant to put you in the blogs section.


Actually, that explains why I puzzled yesterday "I thought I linked Random Brainwave".

Max Newton was a journalistic right-hand man of Uncle Rupert back in the 60's and 70's.

Maybe right-hand man is perhaps too high up the order; maybe right ankle man gives a better sense of Newton's place in the hierarchy. A bon-viviant, by all accounts, and used to be fond of a drink as well. But he snuffed it in 1980 so he's faded into journalistic lore.

At least, I think thats right. Corrections welcomed.

thanks tony!

I recently obtained a mini-speaker for my walkman (yes, someone still uses cassettes) from a packet of Neutral Brains -- and I didn't weigh the packet on the supermarket scales as some unscrupulous types do -- of course there were signs of neanderthal activity, as some packets on the shelf had just been torn open.

for Scott Wickstein: I though Newton was the founding Editor of The Australian ? I Goggled the name and got this:

" if I was searching around for a modern Australian Voltaire, Maxwell Newton would be. right up there.

In 1968 there was a man called Maxwell Newton who has set himself up as a publisher in Canberra. He was a brilliant journalist and economist. ...
www.fsvonline.org/docs/ackland.doc -

Alcohol Helped Kill A Talented Journalist
Maxwell Newton was one of the most talented journalists of his generation. He became the Editor of the "Financial Review" and took the paper from being an ...

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