BITCH HUNT

It's ridiculous Australia are playing a test in Bangladesh less than a week after they played one in Sorth Efrica. Even without the trampolines to sand-pits it's pretty much a no-win situation. Very no-win, as it's turned out. So. Just what does any self-respecting sports fan do in this situation? Have a bitch, of course, then go witch hunting for scape goats.

Bitch: What's with the pitch? Was it this bad yesterday?

Hunt: What the fuck was Damien Martyn thinking?

Feel free to register your objectionables.

Comments

[Tiger.W]

Australia are playing like spazzes.

[Russell Allen]

Serves em right for playing with putters

[Tony.T]

Don't ya mean puttees?

[Tony.T]

8:30. On the Couch then.

[pat]

What is the point of this Bangladesh tour? What is the point of Marto, or Dizzy? And can someone at last see the point of Magilla?

[Tony.T]

Magilla? Whaddaya talking about, Pat? He's an eight wicket hero with a better cellar than Warne.

[pat]

That's what I'm saying Tony: can't the selectors at last see his value, what more does he have to do to prove himself, 10 wickets in both innings?- they only ever chuck Magilla in when the matches are of little consequence. When he does get a run he's an absolute champion. He should've played in the last Ashes series - he is a man harshly dealt with unlike Marto (Dizzy should have made way for an up and comer).

[Tony.T]

Magilla should certainly have played in the 4th and 5th tests in England. In 100 years time (when tests are 50 over a side) punters will be astounded when the records showed Magilla with around 200 wickets was a second choice bowler.

Still, he DOES get a lot of wickets with long-hops. Then again, so did Botham.

[pat]

Acknowledged about the long hops but there is more to his non-selection I reckon. Either it is felt that he disrupts team harmony (some sort of perceived elitism on Magilla's part, Wine Wanker vs Victor Bravo) or the selectors have it in for him.

Same goes for Bracken. Another performer when he gets a go - but he rarely gets the go. Is it his helmet haircut, I just dunno.

PS. Pup's starten to give me the shits.

[Tony.T]

I never know what to make of those claims that players need to fit into the team dynamic. It's often held as a reason Magilla can't get in. More like they just rate Warne as a better bowler and don't like going into a match sacrificing a quick.

That ball that got Clarke wasn't as good as everyone makes out. Sure it was a tidy delivery, but Clarke would have played it comfortably if he hadn't angled his bat and been lazy with is front foot. Precisely what a test batsman should have been watchful about in the conditions.

[Vindicate]

Well I dunno what the Aussies were eating on the plane to banged-up-ladesh but I sure know what they, and we, are eating a whole lot of now.

Either that or the lads will come out tommorrow and say: right boys, funs over, uncle Warnie has sent enough lollies for you to smack to the boundary - he's a bit sore and a little grumpy so here's where the fun stops... , and proceed to bowl em out for all of 26... half of those being No Balls from Lee and Clarke as they attempt to snare the wickets before the master spinner weaves his web.

Or not.

[Tony.T]

They are probably still hungover from winning the last test last week.

I'd settle for us overhauling their total, setting them a curly target. Then have them choke as we roll them for fuck-all thus avoiding a last innings chase.

Or ... umm ... you know.

[nick]

9th April 2006 - close of play, at Centrebet, Bangladesh $34.00 for the win. 10th April 2006 - close of play, Centrebet again, Bangladesh $3.35 the win. Oh. My. God. Where will this rank in the pantheon of sporting shame? I vote second only to the loss of the Ashes.

[Pedro the Ignorant]

Attitude.
I'll bet they were all on the piss after shoving Serf Effrica's nose in the dirt (And quite rightly, too!), then decided that the Deshis would be as easy to beat as the Footerscray U-17's.

Ho hoho, chaps, let's have a bit of fun with the easybeats, what?

Whoops.

[Tony.T]

Bangladesh are $3.35? Generous bookies. Get on board before the odds shrink any further.

[Tony.T]

Pedro: Perhaps the whole team pulled a Symonds. Not just ... err ... Symonds.

[nick]

Symonds is drunk as a skunk because he is thanking god he won't be forever associated with this debacle. No Symonds, no win against Bangladesh. Punter - beaten by the Poms and the Banglas. Fuck. Steve Waugh will kill him.

[Clem Snide]

Don't forget that Ian Chappell shares the distinction with his nemesis Don Bradman of playing in an Australian team that lost to Canada. But those two debacles were some 40 years apart. To lose twice against Bangladesh within a year trumps that.

[Dirk Thruster]

Still, he DOES get a lot of wickets with long-hops.
I don't care how he gets'em, so long as he gets'em.

[girtbysea]

magilla never got a fair go, but lately he is making his case for selection every time he gets on telly. it is shitting me a bit coz he sounds up himself when he does it. it is sad that the selectors haven driven such a great man to feel he needs to do this. i am surprised he didn't go play for someone else.

[Some other Bruce]

Did the Aussies even have a net session? The pitch is essentially the same but the Bangers are playing it their way rather than trying to force their natural game ont it. Lee and Clark were trying to bang it in and all it did was sit up and say "hit me!" Whereas the Bangers are sending down fast off-breaks and playing to the ball staying down. Watching Punter struggle by going back across to pull a ball based on length and then chop down as it hadn't even reached knee high - I knew we were in trouble.

[Tony.T]

I knew we were in trouble from the very first ball when Hayden only just managed to keep out a shooter.

[Tony.T]

It says in the Hun that the Aussies had one net session. I wouldn't bother reading the rest of the article, if I was youse. Here's a sample:

"Even Martyn, who is generally comfortable on the dead subcontinent wickets, couldn't do a thing about Rafique's fourth ball of the day."

[Mr Z]

What about selectors then?

Trevor Hohns vacates chairman's seat, replaced by Andrew Hilditch and Steve Rixon to fill the empty spot!

Was Murray Bennett already retired? Bob Holland dead? Peter Taylor out fishing? Were Warwick Darling, Trevor Chappell or Dirk Whelam unavailable?

[Tony.T]

Graeme Beard was playing darts.

[Mr Z]

Ray Bright and Bruce Laird were unavailable for comment.

[Snr Nubi]

Where's Harry Frei..Played footy too you know!

[Harry.F]

Ich bin hier - Hündchen! Hündchen! Hündchen! Woof! Woof! Woof!

[Toni der Lehrer: If you've been to Phone Dome, you'll know what Harry is on about.]

[Some other Bruce]

At least the ultimate humiliation has been avoided thanks to a Gilly ton and some wall work from Dizzy.

Thank fuck for that.

[Tony.T]

Pity Dizzy played a shocker to get out. The big goose.

[Tony.T]

Doesn't it give you the shits when an umpire is steadfast in his refusal to give anything other than a plumb LB, then finally pays a shocker?

Well, it gives me the shits.

[Scott Wickstein]

Brett Lee bowling with one slip with the new ball gives me the shits too.

[Tony.T]

Especially when he fires so many down leg side.

[Stu]

MacGill's record is only this good, coz he only gets picked on the absolute turners! It's like taking someone along to only play when the tracks are flat, hard and true, and the grounds tiny, then bragging because he has a good batting average - the guy needs to take a long hard look at himself...

On the umpiring - I think they're guessing.

[Stu]

Half of Bangladesh's first 50 runs in this innings came through edges to third man of fine leg, yet they remove a slip and don't put in a third man - the should be 5 for 80!