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Mercy Bo-Coop, Monsieur AB. You latté swilling Magpie dog. Is Prince Rainier dead yet?

Nope.

Is he the one was married to Grace Kelly?

Yup.

Check.

Good.

Snap.

I'll speak to you after, Far Car…

Is that fair dinkum?

Or is it "Knightsbridge" or something similar with a sticker over it?

Like this wag has on The Underground?

https://www.notetoself.co.uk/old/2002/06/making_the_tube.html

You've got to click on the picture, Queue me old ball. This blog is the prince of multi-layered gag-play. In fact, the shimmering wittiness often makes me gag.

On an artificial respirator - doesn't sound like he'll be at the next Monaco game but I'll keep an eye our for him.

Sounds grim. I take it he won't be tossing any flares, darts or hot coins, then. Or brawling with the Marsailles fans. Tough break.

This strange obsession with Hasselhoff & Kit the car and all associated topics is halfway to borderline insanity Tony. Do you talk to YOUR car ? Have you got a weekend job down there on your (admitedly poor) beaches ? Are you an extremely bad singer who has a bit of success with German audiences ?

Brett LOL!!!

Hmmm I was starting to wonder the same thing. What is it between you and David Hasselhoff?

A condom, one would hope.

I'm disappointed in you three. I'm beginning to suspect you don't recognise or appreciate true talent.

PS: I do talk to my car. His friends call him Max. You three can call him Mr Mazda.

they have 'Hogshead' pubs over there now ? Serving warm ale no doubt. They don't do cold ones like the Aussies.

You know something, Brett, when I lived in the UK, I never for a moment noticed the beer was warm. It never seemed warm to me, and always tasted fine.

Now, though, I'm off the sauce, so I can categorically state ALL beer is evil. And beer drinkers are sinners.

ALL beer is evil. A comment that is nothing short of bloody scandalous mate. You should be held under a vat of cold lager for the precise time of 2 minutes 20 seconds and then recant that horrible sentence. As beer is my God and all that.

Now, though, I'm off the sauce, so I can categorically state ALL beer is evil.

"The only thing worse than a whore is a reformed whore." – Roy Bean.


There are an awful lot of crosses on that map. What are they, hospitals or cemeteries?

Justice, you sons of bitches!

The misapprehension arises because ale is usually vaguely warm, whereas lager is chilled.

Meanwhile, when my parents where still together back in the mists of time, and I was 7 or 8 years old, my father, who works for HM Customs, took me down to the docks before school and into one of the warehouses: within was both the Knightrider car and the Batmobile from the first Tim Burton film. I sat in both. KITT was disappointingly plasticky inside.

Sat in both Kitt and the Batmobile? Now THAT'S street cred. No matter how plasticky.

It was a good experience though. I was hyper all day at school - my teacher accused me of lying about it and made me apologise to the class. Fuckers.

https://c.myspace.com/00071/81/14/71354118_s.gif

Fuckin' teachers, alright! Fuckers!

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